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Do You Have Sex in the Dark? Building Sexual Confidence for Men 💡

THE MEN'S SELF HELP PODCAST

Release Date: 10/27/2026

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More Episodes

Men struggle with sexual confidence more than people might think. Body image issues can affect how men see themselves, how comfortable they feel during intimacy, and how they navigate relationships.

In this episode of The Men’s Self-Help Podcast, Dr. John Moore explores the impact of body-image anxiety on men's intimacy, relationships, and everyday life. Sexual anxiety is also part of the discussion.

Through the story of a client named Ridge, Dr. John examines how concerns about physical appearance can extend far beyond the bedroom, affecting everything from mirrors and photographs to family gatherings, dating, and intimate relationships.

The episode also explores practical strategies for managing body-image anxiety and building sexual confidence, including visualization, affirmations, behavioral changes, and the “As If” technique.

Plus, Dr. John answers a listener question about recognizing when a long-term friendship may have run its course.

💙 Episode Sponsor: BetterHelp

This episode of The Men’s Self-Help Podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp.

Get started: Visit BetterHelp

🎧 In This Episode

• Male body image and appearance anxiety

• Sexual confidence, performance anxiety, and intimacy

• How shame and avoidance can affect relationships

• Why body insecurity can spread into other areas of life

• Using the “As If” technique to challenge anxious thinking

• Realistic visualization and behavioral change

• Recognizing when a friendship may need to change

📚 Recommended Reading

The Adonis Complex by Harrison G. Pope Jr., Katharine A. Phillips, and Roberto Olivardia

This book explores the psychological impact of male body-image concerns, including muscularity, appearance preoccupation, shame, and the pressure many men experience to look a certain way.

It's a useful resource for understanding how body-image anxiety can influence self-esteem, relationships, and everyday behavior.

Amazon: The Adonis Complex

🔗 Related Resources

Hypnosis vs. Meditation — What's the Difference?

Learn more about the differences between clinical hypnotherapy and meditation in this Psychology Today article by Dr. Ran Anbar.

Article on Psychology Today on clinical hypnotherapy and meditation by Dr Ran Anbar

🔬 Research on Men and Body Image

Men’s Body Satisfaction — Chapman University

Research involving more than 100,000 men examining satisfaction with physical appearance, body weight, muscle tone, and muscularity.

Study Findings via ScienceDaily

Body Image and Men — Mental Health Foundation

Information and research examining how body-image concerns affect men, including anxiety, social comparison, appearance-related distress, and efforts to conceal perceived physical imperfections.

Visit the Mental Health Foundation

⚠️ Disclaimer

The Men’s Self-Help Podcast is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It is not therapy and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or professional mental health treatment. If you are struggling, please contact a qualified professional where you live.

📱 Follow on Social Media

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Instagram: Guy Counseling

🧠 Thought Court Worksheet — Free Listener Resource

Want to challenge an unhelpful thought and examine it from a more balanced perspective?

Dr. John created a free Thought Court worksheet designed to help you identify, question, and reframe unhelpful thinking patterns. The accompanying Guy Counseling guide walks you through the exercise step by step.

No signup, no email address, and no strings attached. Just download the worksheet and use it whenever you find it helpful.

Download the Free Thought Court Worksheet + How-To Guide

☕ Support the Show

If you've found value in this podcast and would like to support its independent production, you can do so through Buy Me a Coffee.

Contributions help cover hosting, audio production, editing, and the development of future episodes of The Men’s Self-Help Podcast.

Support The Men’s Self-Help Podcast

✉️ Contact the Show

Have a question for Dr. John or a topic you'd like to hear discussed on a future episode?

You can reach the podcast through the Guy Counseling website.

Use the Contact Form

Please keep in mind that the show receives a significant amount of email, and not every question can be featured.

When writing, let us know whether you give permission for your question to be shared on the podcast. Identifying details may be changed to protect privacy.

🤝 Affiliate & Sponsor Disclosure

This episode may include paid sponsorships or affiliate links. If you make a purchase, sign up for a service, or take another qualifying action through one of these links, The Men’s Self-Help Podcast may receive compensation at no additional cost to you.

As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. Sponsors and recommended resources may vary by episode.

🎛️ Production Notes

Written and produced by Dr. John Moore, with Joel Oliver (audio) and editorial contributors. Artwork by Adobe Firefly; sounds by Pixabay. Episodes may combine live recording and synthesized audio for listener questions, production efficiency, and contributor privacy.