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Rest & Laziness

Authentic Men's Group podcast

Release Date: 01/06/2022

Introducing The Shadow show art Introducing The Shadow

Authentic Men's Group podcast

The Shadow is all those parts of ourselves we’ve shoved into the dark because we were told they’re unacceptable. This is what we call repression – unconsciously hiding these aspects to fit in and feel loved. And no shame. This helped us survive as kids. But as adults, we take it a step further with suppression – consciously choosing to hide these parts, leading to inauthenticity. Resources we mentioned to start engaging in your own shadow work: Book: Podcast:  

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Authentic Grief - Finding Meaning in Your After (Part 4) show art Authentic Grief - Finding Meaning in Your After (Part 4)

Authentic Men's Group podcast

Chapter #7   Suicide The word “”committed” is usually used in the context of crimes.  2016 suicide was ranked the 10thcause of death in the US. Pg 116 men die from suicide 4x more then women.  Pain is a natural reaction to death but suffering is what our mind does to us. 118 Death by suicide is not a selfish act or even a choice. It’s a sign of a mind that needs help. 114 The path to freedom from the suffering caused by our minds is through finding meaning. Pg 118 There are many paths to meaning, and if you search for them, you will eventually find them. 119 Give the...

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Authentic Grief - Finding Meaning in Your After (Part 3) show art Authentic Grief - Finding Meaning in Your After (Part 3)

Authentic Men's Group podcast

Authentic Grief: Finding Meaning In Your After In this series of podcasts we want to address the topic of grief. Grief is something we all experience so we want to take an authentic look at this shared experience. David Kessler wrote a book as a 6th stage of grieving titled Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief. We will be recording this podcast series as an overview to this book and be inviting you to a conversation about grief and how we can approach it through meaning.  What is Grief? Grief is the response to the loss of something deemed important or essential, particularly to the...

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Authentic Grief - Finding Meaning in Your After (Part 2) show art Authentic Grief - Finding Meaning in Your After (Part 2)

Authentic Men's Group podcast

Authentic Grief: Finding Meaning In Your After In this series of podcasts we want to address the topic of grief. Grief is something we all experience so we want to take an authentic look at this shared experience. David Kessler wrote a book as a 6th stage of grieving titled Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief. We will be recording this podcast series as an overview to this book and be inviting you to a conversation about grief and how we can approach it through meaning.  What is Grief? Grief is the response to the loss of something deemed important or essential, particularly to the...

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Authentic Grief (Part 1) show art Authentic Grief (Part 1)

Authentic Men's Group podcast

Authentic Grief: Finding Meaning In Your After In this series of podcasts we want to address the topic of grief. Grief is something we all experience so we want to take an authentic look at this shared experience. David Kessler wrote a book as a 6th stage of grieving titled Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief. We will be recording this podcast series as an overview to this book and be inviting you to a conversation about grief and how we can approach it through meaning.  What is Grief? Grief is the response to the loss of something deemed important or essential, particularly to the...

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The Solution to Resolutions (Re-Release) show art The Solution to Resolutions (Re-Release)

Authentic Men's Group podcast

How effective are resolutions?  Do they work?

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Authenticity In An Artificial World Part 2 show art Authenticity In An Artificial World Part 2

Authentic Men's Group podcast

In a culture of “artificial intelligence” and “virtual reality” it can be a challenge to be authentic. In this podcast we continue this conversation and give 4 key factors of how to start unlocking our authentic self.  Michael Kernis and Brian Goldman developed an  They came up with a technical description of authenticity as "the unimpeded operation of one's true or core self in one's daily enterprise." People who score high in authenticity are also more likely to respond to difficulties with effective coping strategies, rather than resorting to drugs, , or...

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Authenticity in the Holidays show art Authenticity in the Holidays

Authentic Men's Group podcast

In this podcast we talk about what it is like to live authentically during the holidays. We reference the 8 qualities and how we personally will look to incorporate these into our holidway experience with friends and family. 8 Qualities of Authenticity:  Curiosity Calm Clarity Connectedness Confidence Courage Creativity Compassion  

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Authenticity in an Artificial World show art Authenticity in an Artificial World

Authentic Men's Group podcast

In a culture of “artificial intelligence” and “virtual reality” it can be a challenge to be authentic. Authenticity means erasing the gap between what you firmly believe inside and what you reveal to the outside world. Adam Grant Living an authentic life with courage is meeting your fear, looking it in the eye, but diving in anyway because it is how you want to show up for yourself. Brene Brown The idea of authenticity is a powerful shaping force for individual identity, a functional state, a way of moving through the world. Authenticity is also a feeling, and research shows it feels...

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Regretfully Yours (Part 2)  show art Regretfully Yours (Part 2)

Authentic Men's Group podcast

Regretfully Yours (Part 2)  The Four Categories of Regret from part 1 are: 1. Foundational Regrets - “If only I had more…” 2. Boldness Regrets - “If only took a risk …” 3. Moral Regret - “If I had that decision back I would have…” 4. Connection Regrets - “If I would have stayed connected to…”   How to Respond to Regret: 1. Be Aware of it (this is what the first podcast was dedicated to) Identify them in detail Explore why we have them. The keys to awareness 2. Express it - Do not deny regrets but express them with a select few trusted confidants....

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More Episodes

Men often struggle with understanding the difference between rest and laziness. We either rest and feel lazy or we are lazy and don't get rest. 

Here are some definitions of each:

Laziness: the quality of being unwilling to work or use energy; idleness.

Rest: to cease work or movement in order to relax, refresh oneself, or recover strength.

Laziness is apathetic, just letting whatever happens happen.

Here are 3 approaches to rest well:

1. Rest takes work.

2. Rest gives attention to the natural cycles and rhythms of life.

3. Rest Involves Mindfulness.

Rest is both intentional diligence and intentional negligence.

Diligence is knowing some of the activities that we are going to do when we have down time; things that truly refresh, rejuvenate and recharge us.

It would be a good idea to have certain activities ready to go and up and running so that we can just move into them when we get an opportunity.

We might suggest 3 to 5 different restful activities that you move to when you have time to do so.

Negligence is an important concept to discuss.  Negligence is often considered to be a negative trait for it means there has been failure to take proper care in doing something. That is exactly the thought here. Only what we are saying is not a failure to take proper care, it is actually a success. It is a success to leave office stress at the office, it is a success to leave the email unopened, it is a success to keep the phone in the care while watching your kids weekend games. Planned negligence in this way actually shows you care because you are putting all your attention to the activity (or should we say the inactivity) at hand.

Pay attention to sleep cycles, daily cycles, weekly cycles, monthly cycles and yearly cycles. 

In order to learn and turn bad days in to good data we must be mindful. 

The definition of mindfulness is “a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations.” 

When we are lazy, our mind is distracted. We’re busy trying to avoid our anxiety and stress at work. We just want to shut down our mind. We want to veg out. Our mind cannot observe, because seeing something clearly is precisely what we’re trying to avoid.

Conclusion. 

"In our hurried fast paced culture where busyness is the norm, rest keeps us from being like the rest."

“If we are tired, we may learn to rest so we don’t quit.”

 “Rest. Sleep. Let your spirit have the peace it deserves, let your mind have the dream it desires and let your body have the strength it wants.”