The Grief Men Are Never Taught to Talk About with Coach Martize
Grieve That Sh!t
Episode Description “Grief does not disappear when you ignore it. It just gets heavier when you carry it alone.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, opens an honest conversation about men, grief, and emotional pain. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is a full-body experience that affects thoughts, emotions, and the nervous system. And while grief impacts everyone, many men are taught early that strength means silence. This episode challenges the belief that “big boys...
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How to Grieve a Mother Who Was Your Best Friend with Nikki Part 2
Grieve That Sh!t
“She was more than her ending. And healing didn’t mean letting her go. It meant letting the pain stop running the show.” In Part 2 of this deeply personal episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, continues the raw conversation with Nikki about grieving a mother who was also her best friend. This episode moves beyond the loss and into what happens after the world keeps spinning and you’re still stuck. Nikki shares what it was really like to resist grief work, to believe that suffering was the only way to honor her mom, and to carry...
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How to Grieve a Mother Who Was Your Best Friend with Nikki Part 1
Grieve That Sh!t
“You were never meant to grieve quietly. Your emotions didn’t show up to hurt you. They showed up to help you process what just happened.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Nikki to talk about a kind of loss that cuts straight to the core. The loss of a mother who was also a best friend. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief isn’t one-dimensional. There are layers. And one of the most overlooked layers is the grief that comes from losing the person who knew you,...
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Your Grief Brain vs Your Grieving Heart
Grieve That Sh!t
“Your brain didn’t break when your person died. It’s just doing what it knows—trying to protect you from pain. But grief doesn’t live in your brain. It lives in your heart.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, dives deep into one of the biggest truths about grief: you can’t think your way out of it. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon discovered firsthand that grief isn’t logical—it’s emotional. Your brain tries to reason, fix, and explain the unexplainable, while your heart just breaks wide...
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How to Stop Treating Grief Like a System with Dr. Elijah Frazier Part 2
Grieve That Sh!t
In Part Two of this Grieve That Shit conversation, Sharon Brubaker and Dr. Elijah Frazier move past introductions and into the heart of what grievers struggle with most: choice, accountability, faith, emotions, and permission to heal. This episode challenges one of the most damaging beliefs grievers carry—that grief is something they must endure forever. Sharon and Dr. Frazier speak directly to the idea that pain is inevitable after loss, but staying trapped in suffering is not the only option. They talk honestly about how grief can steal joy, peace, and energy when we are not aware of the...
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How to Stop Treating Grief Like a System with Dr. Elijah Frazier Part 1
Grieve That Sh!t
In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker introduces a defining moment for The Grief School and the podcast. For the first time, she welcomes Dr. Elijah Frazier and shares the news that The Grief School is now powered by The Frazier Group. This is not an announcement episode filled with buzzwords or credentials. It’s a conversation about people, pain, and what real care actually looks like when someone is at their breaking point. Sharon and Dr. Frazier talk openly about why grief cannot be handled by systems, scripts, or one-size-fits-all solutions. They explore the difference...
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What Grief Is Not
Grieve That Sh!t
“Grief is not a mental illness. It’s not weakness. It’s not a checklist to finish or a line you’re supposed to move through. It’s love—with nowhere left to go.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, gets brutally honest about everything grief isn’t. For too long, society has treated grief like a disorder to diagnose, a problem to medicate, or a series of stages to climb. But grief isn’t logical, linear, or tidy—it’s wild, unpredictable, and deeply human. Sharon unpacks why labeling grief as...
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Forever Changed But Not Broken
Grieve That Sh!t
“When your person died, a part of you died too. Not your whole self—but the version of you that only existed in connection with them. That’s the part grief takes. That’s what forever changed really means.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, opens her heart about what it truly means to be forever changed—but not broken. After losing her nephew Austin and later her best friend Sharon, her life split into two: before and after. But in this episode, she invites you into the middle—the space between who you...
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When a Memory Hits You Like Fear
Grieve That Sh!t
Episode Summary: This episode cracks open one of the most frightening and misunderstood parts of grief: when a memory hits your body like a shock. You’re sitting still, lost in a moment with your person, and suddenly your stomach drops, your breath tightens, your heart races, and you remember all over again that they died. It feels like you’re grieving in two places at once. Sharon Brubaker takes you inside the neurobiology behind that jolt. She breaks down how the hippocampus pulls old memories like scenes from a movie, why the amygdala tags those memories as danger, and how your brain...
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Why Noise Feels Like an Attack In Grief
Grieve That Sh!t
Episode Summary: In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker talks about something most grievers never see coming: why normal sounds suddenly feel like an attack. The kids laughing, the microwave door slamming, a choir starting at church, a car alarm in the parking lot. Things you used to handle just fine now hit your body like lightning. Sharon walks you through what is really happening inside your grieving brain. She breaks down the amygdala, the nervous system, the HPA axis, and why grief flips all of them into survival mode. This is not you “being dramatic.” This is biology....
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In this raw, heart-opening episode of Healing Starts with the Heart, grief specialist Sharon Brubaker walks you through one of the deepest truths about loss—grief doesn't just take your person. It takes everything. And no one prepares you for that part.
With her own story and the stories of thousands of grievers she’s supported, Sharon names the unspoken: how grief sneaks in like a thief in the night and strips away your energy, your motivation, your peace, and even your sense of time. This isn’t just emotional pain. It’s physical, spiritual, mental—and it touches every part of your life.
If you’ve felt like grief broke something in you that you can't get back... this episode will make you feel seen. It’s not just you. This is what grief does. But this is also your invitation to take it back—your joy, your identity, your voice, your future.
Key Points Discussed:
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Grief doesn’t just take your person—
It takes you, the version of you who felt whole before the loss. -
Energy depletion and physical exhaustion—
Why simple tasks like getting out of bed, showering, or doing laundry can feel impossible. -
Loss of motivation and pleasure—
The things you used to love may now feel meaningless or numb. -
Sleep disruption—
Why nights are the hardest and how grief hijacks your ability to rest. -
Loss of confidence and focus—
How grief impacts your ability to think clearly, trust yourself, and feel secure in your identity. -
The collapse of inner peace—
Why your nervous system stays on high alert after your loss. -
Grief and identity loss—
Feeling like a stranger in your own life and questioning your role in the world. -
Grief takes your voice—
The silence we fall into when no one understands our pain or says the right thing. -
Time distortion—
Feeling stuck in the moment of loss while time speeds up or slows down around you. -
Future grief—
Mourning the dreams, milestones, and shared plans that will never happen. -
Control and patience vanish—
How grief can make you feel emotionally raw, snappy, and out of control. -
The truth no one tells you—
Grief may have taken everything... but you can take it back.
Journal Questions for Reflection:
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What’s something you’ve lost that no one talks about?
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What do you miss most about yourself—the version of you before the loss?
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Where do you feel most “not like yourself” these days?
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What’s one thing grief made you believe you couldn’t reclaim—but maybe you can?
Join the Journey:
You were not given a life sentence when your person died. You’re allowed to reclaim the pieces of your life that grief tried to steal. The healing starts when you stop pretending you’re okay, and begin honoring what you’ve lost—and what you still deserve to feel.
Subscribe now to Healing Starts with the Heart for new episodes every Wednesday.
You’re not alone. You never were.
Follow Us:
Website: healingstartswiththeheart.com
Facebook: Healing Starts with the Heart
Instagram: @healatthegriefschool
TikTok: @thegriefschool
Come to the Healing Weekend Intensive:
If this episode spoke to the places in you that feel broken, we invite you to spend the weekend with us. You’ll learn how to reclaim your voice, your energy, your identity, and your hope.
Click the link below to waitlist in the upcoming Grief Healing Weekend Intensive.
We’re saving you a seat.