The Grief Men Are Never Taught to Talk About with Coach Martize
Grieve That Sh!t
Episode Description “Grief does not disappear when you ignore it. It just gets heavier when you carry it alone.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, opens an honest conversation about men, grief, and emotional pain. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is a full-body experience that affects thoughts, emotions, and the nervous system. And while grief impacts everyone, many men are taught early that strength means silence. This episode challenges the belief that “big boys...
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How to Grieve a Mother Who Was Your Best Friend with Nikki Part 2
Grieve That Sh!t
“She was more than her ending. And healing didn’t mean letting her go. It meant letting the pain stop running the show.” In Part 2 of this deeply personal episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, continues the raw conversation with Nikki about grieving a mother who was also her best friend. This episode moves beyond the loss and into what happens after the world keeps spinning and you’re still stuck. Nikki shares what it was really like to resist grief work, to believe that suffering was the only way to honor her mom, and to carry...
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How to Grieve a Mother Who Was Your Best Friend with Nikki Part 1
Grieve That Sh!t
“You were never meant to grieve quietly. Your emotions didn’t show up to hurt you. They showed up to help you process what just happened.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Nikki to talk about a kind of loss that cuts straight to the core. The loss of a mother who was also a best friend. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief isn’t one-dimensional. There are layers. And one of the most overlooked layers is the grief that comes from losing the person who knew you,...
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Your Grief Brain vs Your Grieving Heart
Grieve That Sh!t
“Your brain didn’t break when your person died. It’s just doing what it knows—trying to protect you from pain. But grief doesn’t live in your brain. It lives in your heart.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, dives deep into one of the biggest truths about grief: you can’t think your way out of it. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon discovered firsthand that grief isn’t logical—it’s emotional. Your brain tries to reason, fix, and explain the unexplainable, while your heart just breaks wide...
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How to Stop Treating Grief Like a System with Dr. Elijah Frazier Part 2
Grieve That Sh!t
In Part Two of this Grieve That Shit conversation, Sharon Brubaker and Dr. Elijah Frazier move past introductions and into the heart of what grievers struggle with most: choice, accountability, faith, emotions, and permission to heal. This episode challenges one of the most damaging beliefs grievers carry—that grief is something they must endure forever. Sharon and Dr. Frazier speak directly to the idea that pain is inevitable after loss, but staying trapped in suffering is not the only option. They talk honestly about how grief can steal joy, peace, and energy when we are not aware of the...
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How to Stop Treating Grief Like a System with Dr. Elijah Frazier Part 1
Grieve That Sh!t
In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker introduces a defining moment for The Grief School and the podcast. For the first time, she welcomes Dr. Elijah Frazier and shares the news that The Grief School is now powered by The Frazier Group. This is not an announcement episode filled with buzzwords or credentials. It’s a conversation about people, pain, and what real care actually looks like when someone is at their breaking point. Sharon and Dr. Frazier talk openly about why grief cannot be handled by systems, scripts, or one-size-fits-all solutions. They explore the difference...
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What Grief Is Not
Grieve That Sh!t
“Grief is not a mental illness. It’s not weakness. It’s not a checklist to finish or a line you’re supposed to move through. It’s love—with nowhere left to go.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, gets brutally honest about everything grief isn’t. For too long, society has treated grief like a disorder to diagnose, a problem to medicate, or a series of stages to climb. But grief isn’t logical, linear, or tidy—it’s wild, unpredictable, and deeply human. Sharon unpacks why labeling grief as...
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Forever Changed But Not Broken
Grieve That Sh!t
“When your person died, a part of you died too. Not your whole self—but the version of you that only existed in connection with them. That’s the part grief takes. That’s what forever changed really means.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, opens her heart about what it truly means to be forever changed—but not broken. After losing her nephew Austin and later her best friend Sharon, her life split into two: before and after. But in this episode, she invites you into the middle—the space between who you...
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When a Memory Hits You Like Fear
Grieve That Sh!t
Episode Summary: This episode cracks open one of the most frightening and misunderstood parts of grief: when a memory hits your body like a shock. You’re sitting still, lost in a moment with your person, and suddenly your stomach drops, your breath tightens, your heart races, and you remember all over again that they died. It feels like you’re grieving in two places at once. Sharon Brubaker takes you inside the neurobiology behind that jolt. She breaks down how the hippocampus pulls old memories like scenes from a movie, why the amygdala tags those memories as danger, and how your brain...
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Why Noise Feels Like an Attack In Grief
Grieve That Sh!t
Episode Summary: In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker talks about something most grievers never see coming: why normal sounds suddenly feel like an attack. The kids laughing, the microwave door slamming, a choir starting at church, a car alarm in the parking lot. Things you used to handle just fine now hit your body like lightning. Sharon walks you through what is really happening inside your grieving brain. She breaks down the amygdala, the nervous system, the HPA axis, and why grief flips all of them into survival mode. This is not you “being dramatic.” This is biology....
info_outlineEpisode Summary:
In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker talks about something most grievers never see coming: why normal sounds suddenly feel like an attack. The kids laughing, the microwave door slamming, a choir starting at church, a car alarm in the parking lot. Things you used to handle just fine now hit your body like lightning.
Sharon walks you through what is really happening inside your grieving brain. She breaks down the amygdala, the nervous system, the HPA axis, and why grief flips all of them into survival mode. This is not you “being dramatic.” This is biology. Your brain is trying to protect your broken heart and it does not know the difference between emotional danger and physical danger.
Through real stories from her clients, Sharon shows how jumpiness, noise sensitivity, snapping at people, and shutting down in crowds are not personality flaws. They are signs that your grief system is stuck on high alert and has not been taught how to turn off. Then she shows you the path out: learning how to calm your brain by processing the pain of grief instead of running from it.
Key Points Discussed:
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Why everyday noise can feel like an attack when you are grieving
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How the amygdala scans for emotional pain and treats it like danger
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What happens to your thinking center when grief hits and why you feel numb
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How the sympathetic nervous system keeps your body in survival mode
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Why your senses feel sharper, your reactions bigger, and your patience thinner
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The four grief responses Sharon sees most often: resisting, reacting, avoiding, and pretending
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How stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline keep your system on high alert
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Why this noise sensitivity is not permanent when you learn to process the pain
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How Processing the Pain of Grief helps calm your brain and soften your grief
Journal Questions for Reflection:
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What sounds or situations make your body jump or tense up now that you are grieving
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Where do you notice your thinking has slowed down or feels foggy
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When was the last time you snapped or shut down and later realized you were not really mad at that person or thing
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What background noise or repeated behavior from others feels harder to tolerate since your loss
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What would it look like to give your brain and body a place to calm down instead of just pushing through
Conclusion:
Noise sensitivity in grief is not you “losing it.” It is your grief biology doing its best to protect you with the only tools it knows. Your brain is on high alert. Your body is tired. Your system is trying to outrun the pain. But this does not have to be your forever.
When you learn how to process the pain of grief, your nervous system can settle. Your thoughts get clearer. Your reactions soften. The world gets a little quieter again. You will still miss your person, but the grief does not have to feel like an attack every time a memory or a sound shows up.
Contact Us:
Ready to calm your grief brain and learn how to process the pain, not just survive it
Join Sharon Brubaker inside Processing the Pain of Grief, her live classroom where you learn what your brain is doing, how grief works in the body, and how to move the pain out instead of holding it in.
Learn more and get support inside The Grief School community.
Website: thegriefschool.com
Contact: info@thegriefschool.com
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