How A Simple Framework Can Help Us Communicate With Candor And Clarity
Release Date: 05/15/2025
Self Gratitude Is A Muscle That Needs Reps
Imperfect Mens Club
I open this one with a simple ask: if our stuff helps you, drop a quick rating/review on Apple. It really does get this message in front of guys who need it. What we cover Self-gratitude, defined. Appreciating and acknowledging yourself for who you are and what you’ve actually done—without chasing external approval. Bitter vs. better is a choice. The default is bitterness. Choosing better takes practice, self-awareness, and repetition. Regret, comparison, and the inner critic. How we reflect on past choices can inflame regret or dissolve it. Comparison is on my daily...
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Self Mastery - 12 Principles For A Rich Life
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of self mastery and self transformation. Jim found 12 rules of self mastery online Discipline Focus Resilience Consistency Solitude Energy Mind Body Legacy Time Surround Untouchable Jim explains how he was attracted to this framework He connects this exercise to self awareness. He shares that our life is “on us”. No one is coming to help. We are responsible for our lives Mark begins by reading the definition of each word. First is discipline. Mark suggests there is no destination. It’s a journey. Jim suggests discipline requires us to do hard things every day....
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What Life Teaches Us About Self-Discovery - Reflection, Humility, and Belonging
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of Self discovery He frames the topic with Carl Jung’s definition of what happens in life when we reach the age of 60 and then shares additional context about the beginning, middle and tail end of life and how we can “rediscover” ourselves many times over the course of our lives Jim views life in 5 and 10 year “stages”. He doesn’t think everyone goes thru self discovery exercises and then he brings the flywheel framework for context. He shares his research for this episode. He appreciates his solitude as an example of his self discovery and how the...
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Subconscious Self Doubt - The Silent Partner You Never Chose
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of the subconscious mind and the emotion of self doubt. He cites the science that shows we are driven by our subconscious. Somewhere between 85 and 95% of our actions are from subconscious memory Jim shares his opinion about how this topic fits into our wheel. He aligns the discussion to the wheel. He heard a podcast that talked about self doubt and money. He quotes the podcast and agrees with Marks incite into the science of the subconscious. Mark talks about his frame of reference being the people he knows that have varying degrees of emotional balance. Happy people...
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Why Neurodiverse Minds Crave "Frameworks"
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark brings up the topic of frameworks and mentions Jim’s recent adoption of hi “5M Framework” Manifesto Methodology Mentality Machine Mindset Jim found a manifesto that Mark had written 2 years ago while preparing to do some promotion of the podcast and he ties that in to the IMC framework. Our 5 areas of life flywheel Jim shares that the actual topic came from my being 1 minute late (I’m never late). Jim then goes over our flywheel of life framework and the 5 areas. He reflects on where he was in life when we first met. He was out of sorts and seeking answers. Then he talks about his...
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What Advice Would You Give Your 15 Year Old Self?
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of Jim’s interaction with his young niece at 15 asking him what he might do differently looking back at his 15 year old self Both guys thought it was cool for such a young person to ask such a wise question Mark reads the response that Jim sent in a text message to his niece Jim reflects on his response and how context and circumstance are so important. Mark agrees and cites the difference between good and bad advice. He iterates on the value of what you don’t do versus what you should do. Jim feels that what you should not do is more important than what you...
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Your Self-Narrative: Hero or Hostage?
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of one’s self narrative. He says you either take personal responsibility or seek blame. Mark reads the definition. He says it’s important to know what you can and can’t control. Jim relates the topic to the wheel. The self’s in the center. Jim says he’s been more aware of the self narratives of other people he’s encountered. He thinks conflict in this country is at an all time high. Jim brings up a recent encounter where trust was lost. He feels like he’s being judged as a white man. He said that this encounter was unnecessary. Mark thinks we’ve made...
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Your Inner Critic - Rewriting the Story You Tell Yourself
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the deep dive Jim took into the writing of Carl Jung and the specific topic he writes about - self talk Mark thinks most us have more negative self talk than positive Jim adds context - Jim likes stuff related to our podcast and our wheel. Particularly the self. He goes around our flywheel. When you’re challenging yourself, self talk can creep in Mark says this voice is powerful and not always positive. It’s also often subconscious. Mark reads the definition Mark reads Jung’s 5 archetypes The Good Student The Silent Healer The Starving Artist The Invisible One The Over...
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Navigating Our Response To Trauma With Grace
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of trauma and how we respond to trauma This topic came up from some family events and aging and how people respond to trauma Jim brings a framework to the discussion…The 5 “F’s” Jim fits trauma into our flywheel framework. He breaks down the 5 areas and we decide to focus on relationships and The Self We can’t seem to discuss anything without coming back to self awareness Jim got this framework from a podcast he listened to about trauma. The 5 F’s of trauma response are Fight Freeze Fawn Flop Flight Jim thinks most people opt for flight. They run Mark says...
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Self Alignment Toward That "One Thing"
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark brings in the topic in the context of our Wheel. The concept of focusing one only one thing until you momentum and can diversify with only the cash flow from that one thing. Simplicity Jim brings up the idea of focus and how that is bolstered with simplicity. He expands on our wheel and the five areas of life and the center of the wheel, the self Jim and Mark share their experience with the mainstream news. Both guys share that they have tried life with it and without it…and the impact is real. It’s a massive distraction Jim brings in self alignment in the context of being self...
info_outlineMark brings up the topic of communication in the context of self talk and self reflection
Then he shares a framework Jim brought that he uses for communication. The triple A method
Assumptions/Agreement/Action
Mark is a fan
Jim brings up a favorite quote of his - “The most important conversation you’ll ever have is the conversation you have with yourself”…and that’s a crazy person
Mark shares his self talk routine
Jim - simply…you have to turn the channel
He shares how his mind works. He finds or creates tools to help him. That’s where this AAA framework came from. He uses it to make meetings and conversation brief and productive. He does it out of respect and courtesy. It encourages personal accountability
Jim jokes that everything he just said doesn’t apply to women:). Joking aside, both guys see big differences, but believe them to be compliments
Mark sees the conversation being about personal responsibility as they talk about Stoicism
Jim distinguishes between different types of conversations and different times in our lives
Clarity, transparency and efficiency are all served by the framework
Mark shares the saying on his t-shirt - “What do you mean by that?”
Mark shares his appreciation for frameworks…specifically Jim’s AAA framework
Mark says a lot of people don’t like to be held accountable
Jim shares a visual rendering of his framework and offers some explanation of how the framework works. Mark chimes in in agreement
Mark shares his experience with people who are scared to speak up. Most people don’t like candor and confrontation. It makes them afraid
Jim clarifies his opinion of women as being better than men at many things
Jim also clarifies that his framework is not for more personal conversations. It’s a business framework
Mark shares his story about taking meeting notes in his sales meeting. How 10 people handed in 10 different sets of notes
Jim thinks AI tools will help with this. Transcripts. Word for word. He explains how he might use them to bring in. His framework on command. Prompts and percentages of time that people talk during the conversation
Mark shares how he started handing out transcripts of meeting notes. He was surprised at how reticent people were to be held to what they said by the transcript
Mark shares his stories about how he handled this before AI
Jim clarifies that his framework is to be used before, during and after conversations. Not just before.
Then Jim brings up our wheel to add context to our topic. He has redone it for his use in an upcoming speech. And because we haven’t updated it in a while. He reflects on all the selfs…agent, respect…
Both guys express their appreciation for the wheel. Their framework
Jims goes over the wheel in detail
Mark shares his opinion that he changes the way he communicates depending on what life area he’s in
Mark goes into detail about the difference between how Jim’s brain works versus Mark.
Jim continues to analyze how the wheel works and gets into ideology and politics as well as other levels outward on the wheel. He goes into details about the profession category. The differences between employed people and self employed people. Whose money are we playing with. Not a criticism. An observation
Both guys share their father’s perspective on this
Mark shares the power of “WHY” and “WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT”
The value is in the follow up question. Clarity and context