Menopause: From Estrogen Washing to Social Silence, with Dr Aisling Quiery & Rati Roberta Riccardi
Release Date: 11/13/2025
Paul Noiles on, The Malevolent Nature of Emotional Abuse
The Gifts of Trauma
Hosted by Rosemary Davies-Janes & J’aime Rothbard. Produced by J’aime Rothbard. How do smart, accomplished people end up in emotionally abusive relationships without realizing it? As both a trauma coach and former victim, Paul illuminates how emotional abuse operates through fear, manipulation, and control—and why it's so difficult to recognize and name. He also touches on common signs; chronic invalidation, gaslighting, control disguised as concern, walking on eggshells, confusion, toxic shame, and how our earliest attachments can create susceptibility. In this...
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Mandy Rodstrom & Debbie Mason on, Creating Spaces for Stuttering to Exist
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Mandy Rodstrom & Debbie Mason on, Creating Spaces for Stuttering to Exist Hosted by Rosemary Davies-Janes. Produced by J’aime Rothbard. What if traditional fluency-focused approaches designed to "fix" stuttering cause more harm than healing? In this conversation, speech therapists Mandy Rodstrom and Debbie Mason share personal and clinical insights that reveal how trauma, nervous system dysregulation and social stigma profoundly impact those who stammer. They highlight the critical importance of connecting people who stutter with supportive communities where stuttering is welcomed and...
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Cat McCarthy on Emergent Authenticity & Rewriting Scripts
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Zach Bush, MD & Eva Dalak on Relating to Our Original Imprint: Nature & Collective Healing.
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Hosted by J’aime Rothbard & Rosemary Davies-Janes. Produced by J’aime Rothbard. What if the path to inner and outer peace—and to the survival of our species—runs through our biology, not just our psychology? In this bonus finale to our Relating Series, Eva and Zach guide us beyond the familiar terrain of human-to-human relating to the new ground of relating to our original imprint. This conversation weaves hard science with systems thinking and spiritual wisdom to show that rather than transcending our humanity, healing our separation wound is about fully embracing our original...
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Unsafe! Navigating Domestic, Public and Systemic Violence, with Dr Valerie (Vimalasara) Mason-John and Jordan Decker
The Gifts of Trauma
Hosted by Rosemary Davies-Janes and J’aime Rothbard. Produced by J’aime Rothbard. This vulnerable conversation continues exploring relating through the LGBTQ+ lens, as Vimalasara and Jordan share insights rarely disclosed to the heteronormative population. Jordan reflects on the inner work required to create safety for others—unpacking his own trauma so he can hold space for someone else's. Vimalasara addresses the harsh realities of domestic violence in LGBTQ+ communities, highlighting the barriers to seeking help—being subjected to transphobia, homophobia, or violence in...
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Gender & Identity, From Unconscious to Conscious with Valerie (Vimalasara) Mason-John and Jordan Decker
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Hosted by Rosemary Davies-Janes and J’aime Rothbard. Produced by J’aime Rothbard. This thought provoking conversation explores relating through the LGBTQ+ lens, but not only presented to that community. Instead it is a vulnerable and honest sharing in which Vimalarara and Jordan offer insights and perspectives rarely disclosed to the heteronormative population. In this inclusive episode they touch on the: - Use of pronouns can create a sense of safety and inclusion - Perspective of gender as a social construct rather than a personal identity - Historical impact of religious and...
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Reducing Relationship Issues Through Proactive Design & Planning, with Dr Stan Tatkin and Leila Bahri-Lucas
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Hosted by Rosemary Davies-Janes & Leila Bahri-Lucas. Produced by J’aime Rothbard. This episode reminds us that the unconscious processes that drive humans, our memories and survival instincts, often lead to misunderstandings and reactive behaviors. Consequently, most relationship issues, while they may seem personal, actually stem from our innate drives. Stan outlines that rather than being approached casually, successful relationships require deliberate design, shared purpose, defined roles, and agreed-upon principles. We also explore: - The PPPRRR Approach: Couples can...
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Polyamory: Attachment, Trauma & Relational Growth Unpacked, with Jessica Fern, David Cooley & JP Bolhuis
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Hosted by Rosemary Davies-Janes. Produced by J’aime Rothbard. This episode introduces Polyamory, a form of consensual non-monogamy, as a relational style involving multiple loving, consensual, romantic partners simultaneously. It emphasizes trust, open communication (as opposed to secretive ‘cheating’) and mutual agreement. Jessica and David, themselves polyamory practitioners and co-authors of two books on Polyamory, are joined by JP Bolhuis, a Psychosocial Therapist, Compassionate Inquiry Practitioner and Private Mentor who recently entered the world of polyamory. Jesica and David...
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Rethinking Sex Addiction: Trauma, Shame & Compulsive Sexuality, with Diana Safta & Silva Neves
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Hosted by J’aime Rothbard and Rosemary Davies-Janes. Produced by J’aime Rothbard. In this soft and flowing conversation, Silva Neves differentiates the term "sex addiction" from "sexual compulsivity," as addiction is an independent disorder, while compulsion arises from environmental distress. Like food, sex is a primary drive, and has a natural physiological stopping point not present in other addictions. The analogy of food and diverse cuisines to normalize conversations about sexuality, highlighting that different tastes and preferences in food are accepted, but similar...
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Healing Northern Ireland: From Personal Trauma to Societal Change, with Dr Paul Gallagher
The Gifts of Trauma
Hosted by Kevin Young. Produced by J’aime Rothbard. In this conversation, Kevin introduces us to Dr Paul Gallagher, a lecturer in trauma studies at Cork University who started his formal education at age 40, after a significant "gap" in his life. Born in Belfast in 1972 at the height of "The Troubles," Paul recounts growing up in a war zone, where at 21, his home was invaded and his family held hostage. During this attack, he was shot and paralysed, and while physical and medical care were provided, psychological support was not. Paul highlights: - The crucial roles of...
info_outlineHosted by Kevin Young. Produced by J’aime Rothbard.
In this conversation, our guests forge a link between childhood trauma and the severity of menopausal symptoms. Aisling, a GP who is herself experiencing perimenopause, notes that the menopausal women who consult her often carry immense stress from being "sandwiched" between their peak career responsibilities and caring for children, grandchildren and aging parents.
Together Aisling and Rati contrast:
- "Estrogen Washing" a term Aisling coined to suggest that HRT often serves as a "wash" which may offer temporary relief but is covering deeper societal issues like capitalist demands, patriarchy, and the emotional burdens placed on women.
- Societal Silence: Despite a full 25% of the UK population being perimenopausal or menopausal, there's a significant lack of open discussion on this topic amongst women, and little to no discussion about it between menopausal women and the men in their lives.
- Negative Cultural Views of Menopause; In the west it’s often seen as an end of productivity and fertility. It’s associated with shame and unattractiveness. In Native American traditions, where older women are revered as "elders" and "wisdom keepers," menopause symptoms are often less severe.
The conversation concludes with supportive future visions for women in menopause. Rati suggests women need space, quiet, rest, and reduced workloads, along with curious, loving, and respectful listening from others. Aisling envisions women's menopausal struggles as harbingers of greater cultural challenges to come. She suggests men will take on more emotional load, and society will come to value aging women as wise, empathetic leaders.
Rati Roberta Riccardi, Somatic Therapist
After a 12-year career as a professional freelance translator in Italy, Rati started exploring. For the last two decades, she has been supporting people in expanding their consciousness and empowering them to find their inner healer/teacher through a variety of modalities.
A Compassionate Inquiry® Practitioner, Facilitator and Mentor, and a psychedelic assisted therapy preparation and integration practitioner, Rati has explored different healing traditions, including various shamanic approaches. She is trained in Mediterranean massage, Reconnective Healing and The Reconnection, Hatha Yoga, Nada Yoga, Meditation, Breathing Techniques and Intuitive Energy Work. She has studied the consciousness expanding and healing properties of sound extensively with Alexandre Tannous and facilitates group and one-on-one sound meditations.
Rati has travelled extensively, learning, studying, and guiding groups with prolonged stays in Brazil, Peru and Mexico to explore indigenous culture and traditions.
About Dr Aisling Quiery
Aisling is a Family Doctor (GP), a Compassionate Inquiry® Practitioner and a Health/Life Coach who combines her medical knowledge, her Compassionate Inquiry® training and Coaching to help people to heal through connection to their authentic selves, to the present moment, and to each other. With her support, her patients move beyond symptom management, to healing.
After training as a doctor in Scotland she worked as a GP in an economically deprived area of North Edinburgh where she also ran a community Hepatitis C clinic, a service for people who inject drugs and worked in a primary care service for people experiencing homelessness. It was through her addictions work that she first discovered the work of Gabor Maté.
Aisling attended a plant medicine retreat with Gabor and the Shipibo healers in Peru in 2019 and went on to train in Compassionate Inquiry®, a modality that changed how she sees herself, her patients and the medical model. She lives on an organic farm in County Down in the North of Ireland and works at GP practices in her local area as well as working privately with individuals and groups using Compassionate Inquiry®.
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Resources:
Websites:
Rati's Compassionate Inquiry Profile
Aisling's Professional Website
Aisling's Compassionate Inquiry Profile
Related Links
Margaret Mead
Books:
The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Trauma and Adversity
Quotes:
“Mary Jane Minkin, a researcher at Yale University, found that societies where elders and wise women are revered and celebrated show far less severe menopause symptoms than societies where they are not”. - Dr Aisling Queiry
“13 million women in the UK are perimenopausal/ menopausal, that’s 25% of the population…”
- Dr Aisling Queiry
“I've just read that the Arabic word for menopause translates as, 'age of despair.'”
- Dr Aisling Quiery
“...elephants, whales and human beings are the only three mammals that have a menopausal period for the female of that species. The only reason … is that childbirth is both dangerous, makes a female vulnerable and takes up a lot of her time. So when the reproduction is taken away from a female at a certain age, it frees her up to be a wisdom keeper and a knowledge passer.” - Kevin Young
“There is no greater power in the world than the zest of a postmenopausal woman.” - Margaret Mead
“...we're pushing ourselves so hard and not valuing the aging process and not valuing the wisdom that comes with being an elder, all of that. So let's be curious about that.” - Dr Aisling Quiery
Social Media
FB: Rati: https://www.facebook.com/rriccardi
Aisling: https://www.facebook.com/DrAislingQuiery
IG: Aisling: https://www.instagram.com/draislingquiery/