#152: Restoring the Lost Art of Being Family - A Rallying Cry for Kingdom Parenting
Release Date: 03/13/2025
LOVE IS FEARLESS
If you've been told your exhaustion is a personal failure — that better boundaries or better self-care would fix it — this episode is for you. Because what if the problem isn't how you manage your energy? What if the problem is where it's going? Janet and Doug name a pattern that lives quietly inside countless women's lives: the hidden energy tax of narrative management. The relentless, often unconscious work of holding your own pain and protecting others from the weight of their impact — simultaneously, in the same breath, sometimes in the same sentence. Janet tells her own story in...
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Introduction: "Pain has a way of interrupting purpose. And when pain lasts long enough, survival replaces growth." This devastating reality defines most of the systems we've built—medical, educational, even in the church. We've become really good at helping people survive, but we've stopped dreaming about helping them flourish. Today we're exploring the difference between empire dreams (optimizing within broken systems) and kingdom dreams (believing God has designed something better than we can imagine). You're in the right place if: You've settled into helping your kids just cope with...
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Guest: Dr. Lee Warren, Board-Certified Neurosurgeon Introduction: What if you could change your brain by changing your mind? Board-certified neurosurgeon Dr. Lee Warren joins us to reveal something revolutionary: you're not stuck with the brain you have. Through groundbreaking neuroscience research, we now know that what you repeatedly think about literally restructures your brain. For parents learning to live from agency instead of control, understanding what's actually happening in your nervous system changes everything. Dr. Warren's new book, The Life-Changing Art of Self-Brain Surgery:...
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Introduction: In all of history, there are only two ways to govern: by words or by force. As America celebrates its 250th birthday this year, we're asking: How will we govern our homes? Force demands compliance. Words invite relationship. And the operating system our children learn at home is the operating system they'll carry into the world. Today we're exploring how conversations—not arbitrary consequences—build the kind of trust that makes freedom and agency possible. You're in the right place if: Your child is old enough for tough topics (bullying, sexual identity, pornography,...
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What if the biggest risk isn't failing—but never discovering who God created you to be? In this episode, we revisit the letter B in the Love Is Fearless alphabet with fresh eyes. Back in Season 5 (), we introduced the idea that Beautiful offers safety, healing, and regard—while Functional is just about getting things done. But now we're going deeper. Beautiful isn't about being magazine-worthy. It's about being true. Beautiful is "the most true thing"—what reflects who God created you to be, what reminds you of your Source, what feeds your soul. Functional is what we reach for in...
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What if renewing your mind isn't just spiritual advice—it's actual brain training? In this episode, we explore how attention shapes affection, and how the difference between affections and addictions determines whether your family is being transformed or simply managed into conforming to the patterns of this world. We're introducing groundbreaking work on faith and neuroscience (stay tuned for our full interview with him next month), and discovering how Philippians 4:8 is God's prescription for mental health—not toxic positivity, but actual neural formation. This changes...
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We've become really good at managing crises, but somewhere along the way, we forgot how to live. In this season premiere, we introduce what it means to restore the lost art of being family—creating homes where a hard life is experienced differently, in secure relationships. This isn't about behavior modification or quick fixes. It's about life cultivation. Whether you're a parent, grandparent, or anyone raising or influencing children, this episode sets the foundation for everything we'll explore together this season. In This Episode, You'll Discover: Why modern parenting has become...
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Summary What if the "practical" parenting strategies you're searching for require something deeper first - the liberation of your own mind? In this episode, Janet and Doug explore the third instrument of formation: LIFE - the intentional pursuit and savoring of ideas that are good, true, and beautiful. Drawing on research about manufactured mental captivity and personal stories about breaking generational cycles, they reveal why parents can't create relational safety for their children while their own minds remain captured by anxiety-producing information systems. This isn't about adding more...
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What if the key to spiritual growth isn’t trying harder—but learning how to feel safe, seen, and loved? In this episode, Doug and Janet sit down with psychologist and author Dr. Todd Hall for a powerful conversation about attachment, transformation, and the kind of love that reshapes your life. Together, they explore how our early relational patterns affect not just our parenting and marriage—but our relationship with God. You’ll learn: How to recognize attachment patterns that keep you stuck Why behavior doesn’t change until your nervous system feels safe How to...
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What if discipline isn’t about becoming someone better—but about learning to live from the truth of who you already are? In this episode, we continue our conversation on discipline—not as punishment or control, but as the sacred practice of forming identity through daily habits of love, truth, and presence. We explore how discipline aligns with our new identity in Christ, and how we help our children grow into that truth—not by force, but by faithfulness. You’ll hear stories of real formation—what it looks like in parenting, in marriage, and even in how we relate to ourselves. We...
info_outline1. Great parents are first great children. Before you can lead your family well, you have to embrace your identity as a child of God. Parenting isn’t just about what you do—it’s about
- “The problem isn’t you—it’s the story you’ve been handed.”
- “Parents were never meant to carry the weight of shame—and our kids weren’t meant to inherit it.”
- “The Kingdom of God is at hand, and that changes everything.”
Find more great resources mentioned in this episode:
- Joshua Gordon - LazarusBooks.com - Senior Editor at theleadpastor.com
- #041: If I don't manipulate — How do I Get My Kids to Do the Right Thing Part 1
- #042: If I don't manipulate — How do I Get My Kids to Do the Right Thing Part 2
- Early updates on Janet’s upcoming e-book, church curriculum, and speaking events
- Encouraging blog posts and resources for your family’s journey
- Access to download the Restoring the Lost Art of Being Family manifesto for free