226 The Power of Showing Up: Embracing Imperfection and Struggles with PDA and RSD
Release Date: 01/16/2024
Unapologetically Sensitive
No Room for In-Between: Literal Thinking and Communication Ruptures In this raw and honest episode, Patricia (she/her) shares her ongoing challenges with neurodivergent miscommunication, community rupture, and the emotional toll of being misunderstood. From neighborhood conflicts to horse training lessons, from cancel culture to navigating friendships and travel as an autistic person, Patricia opens up about the messy, contradictory realities of life, belonging, and growth. Listeners will walk away feeling less alone in their struggles with relationships, self-advocacy, and embracing both...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
The Push-Pull of ADHD and Autism: Stretching Without Breaking In this candid conversation, Patricia Young (she/her) and B Lourenco (she/her) dive deep into the realities of living with ADHD, autism, and other forms of neurodivergence. They explore the push-pull between self-accommodation and stretching ourselves, how shame and internalized ableism impact daily life, and what it means to create realistic support systems at home, in relationships, and in the workplace. Expect raw honesty, relatable stories, and practical insights for navigating neurodivergent life. WHAT YOU’LL HEAR IN THIS...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Rupture without Repair, and the Discomfort of Being Misunderstood In this deeply personal episode, Patricia (she/her) unpacks the fallout from a neighborhood rupture and the painful loss of community connection. Through the lens of being autistic and AuDHD, she explores rejection sensitivity, communication breakdowns, friendship trauma, and why repair isn’t always possible. She also shares how co-regulation, body doubling, Costco runs, and fierce family love provide grounding. This conversation is raw, tender, and validating for anyone who has struggled with being misunderstood...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
When ADHD Wants Adventure and Autism Just Wants a Nap Patricia (she/her) explores what it means to show up authentically as a neurodivergent person—especially when navigating the tension between wanting novelty (hello ADHD/AuDHD brains!) and craving sameness (thank you autism). She shares candid stories about celebrating her anniversary, managing low energy, social interactions, and dealing with conflict. Patricia also opens up about balancing autistic traits, ADHD novelty-seeking, PDA (persistent drive for autonomy), and honoring her sensitivity. If you’re autistic, ADHD, AuDHD, or...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
When the Dogs Stop Saying Hi: The Human Need for Connection and Belonging Patricia (she/her) explores the complexities of community, being perceived, and the challenges of navigating relationships amidst misunderstandings and cancel culture. She shares personal experiences of rupture and repair within her community, reflecting on the emotional impact of feeling excluded and the importance of acknowledging one's behavior in relationships. Patricia also highlights the simultaneous beauty of connections and celebrations, even amidst challenges, emphasizing the need for self-acceptance and...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Disempowered to Empowered: Meltdowns, Boundaries & Donuts In this heartfelt episode, Patricia (she/her) shares three powerful personal stories that highlight the challenges—and wins—that come with being a sensitive, creative, neurodivergent human. From navigating family dynamics around living arrangements, to reclaiming power after a disempowering volunteer experience, and even exploring the emotional depth behind a simple craving for an apple fritter, Patricia offers an intimate and validating glimpse into what it's like to be an AuDHDer who feels things deeply—and still...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Friendship, Boundaries, and Other Olympic Sports for Autistic Brains Patricia gets real about friendship challenges, navigating communication mismatches, and how OCD and autistic wiring can shape our relationship expectations. She shares a behind-the-scenes peek into her new podcast project, the insecurities that surfaced while collaborating with her co-host, and how unexpected moments of validation reminded her that what she brings to the table is more than enough. HIGHLIGHTS · Patricia plans to release the podcast bi-monthly to...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Breaking Down Internalized Ableism Summary In this conversation, Patricia explores the concept of internalized ableism, particularly among neurodivergent individuals. She discusses how societal stigma and expectations can lead to negative self-perceptions and feelings of inadequacy. Patricia shares personal experiences and insights on how internalized ableism manifests in various aspects of life, including relationships, self-acceptance, and the pressure to conform to neurotypical standards. She emphasizes the importance of unlearning these hurtful beliefs and embracing one's...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Some Challenges in Neurodivergent Communication Summary In this episode, Patricia discusses the challenges faced by AuDHDers and other neurodivergent individuals in communication, particularly regarding lack of responding to messages. She explores the concept of internalized ableism and how it affects self-perception and interactions. Patricia shares personal experiences and insights on the importance of flexibility in relationships and the need for authenticity in communication. The conversation emphasizes the struggles of neurodivergent individuals, including executive functioning...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Coping and Prepatory Strategies for Overstimulating Situations Summary In this episode, Patricia discusses her experiences with content creation, coping strategies for overstimulation, and managing sensory sensitivities during significant life events like weddings. She shares insights on emotional preparation, adjusting to changes in family dynamics, and maintaining a healthy work-life balance to prevent burnout. Throughout the conversation, she emphasizes the importance of self-care, embracing imperfection, and recognizing the rights of individuals to rest and be themselves....
info_outlineThe Power of Showing Up: Embracing Imperfection and Struggles with PDA and RSD
Jen and I discuss our struggles with showing up and doing life even when it's hard. We model grace and vulnerability, reminding you that it's okay to not have it all together. The conversation touches on topics such as PDA, rejection-sensitive dysphoria RSD, and the pressure of gift-giving. We also discuss the importance of communication and staying connected, even when feeling tired or overwhelmed. This episode is helpful for anyone who may be struggling.
CO-HOST
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC
HIGHLIGHTS
Summary
In this conversation, Patricia and Jen discuss their personal struggles with health issues, specifically vertigo and its impact on their daily lives. They explore the challenges of navigating uncertainty, the importance of showing up authentically even when it's hard, and the need for self-compassion and self-care. They also delve into topics such as perception, autonomy, and the role of humor in medical settings. The conversation highlights the significance of connection, vulnerability, and understanding in supporting one another during difficult times. Ultimately, they emphasize the importance of recognizing and honoring one's own needs and limitations. In this conversation, Jen and Patricia discuss the importance of effective communication and provide practical tips for improving communication skills. They explore the role of active listening, empathy, non-verbal communication, cultural sensitivity, and overcoming communication barriers. The conversation emphasizes the significance of clear and respectful communication in personal and professional relationships.
· We discuss the challenges of being perceived and the pressure to conform to societal expectations.
· The conversation touches on topics such as autism, PDA, and rejection-sensitive dysphoria (RSD).
· We discuss the importance of communication and staying connected, even when feeling tired or overwhelmed.
· It’s okay to not have it all together.
· We talk about the pressure of gift-giving and the anxiety it can cause for neurodivergent individuals.
· We discuss the concept of being in charge and the nervous system getting activated when feeling a loss of autonomy (PDA—Pathological Demand Avoidance or Pervasive/Persistent Drive for Autonomy).
· We friends share our experiences with PDA and how it affects our daily lives.
· We talk about the importance of self-care and setting boundaries to avoid burnout.
· We discuss the challenges of being vulnerable and the fear of rejection that comes with it.
· The conversation touches on the importance of self-acceptance and embracing one's unique traits.
· We discuss the impact of childhood experiences on our current struggles and coping mechanisms.
· We share our experiences with medical care and how we navigate uncomfortable situations.
· We talk about the importance of humor and how it can humanize otherwise sterile environments.
· The conversation ends with a reminder to be kind to oneself and to embrace imperfection as a part of the human experience.
Takeaways
Navigating health issues can be challenging and uncertain, but it's important to show up authentically and seek support.
Self-compassion and self-care are crucial during difficult times, even if it means letting go of expectations and prioritizing rest.
Communication and understanding are key in maintaining healthy relationships and navigating challenges together.
Humor and vulnerability can provide comfort and connection in medical settings, helping to humanize the experience. Effective communication is crucial for building strong relationships and resolving conflicts.
Active listening and empathy are essential skills for effective communication.
Non-verbal communication, such as body language and facial expressions, can convey important messages.
Cultural sensitivity is important for understanding and respecting diverse communication styles.
Identifying and overcoming communication barriers can improve the quality of communication.
Chapters (these times need to be adjusted to the addition of the introduction)
00:00 Introduction and Setting the Tone
01:10 Modeling How to Show Up and Do Life Even When It's Hard
02:06 Supporting Each Other and Being Present
02:31 Understanding and Sharing Personal Health Struggles
06:10 The Uncertainty and Challenges of Dealing with Vertigo
09:01 The Impact of Dizziness on Daily Life and Activities
10:15 Navigating the Emotional and Mental Toll of Health Issues
12:30 The Importance of Connection and Honesty in Difficult Times
13:40 Exploring Personal Awareness and Self-Reflection
21:11 The Influence of Perception and Autonomy on Self-Care
23:51 The Role of Humor and Vulnerability in Medical Settings
26:14 Navigating Overwhelm and Setting Boundaries During the Holidays
29:03 Recognizing Soul Fatigue and the Need for Rest
31:37 Reevaluating Expectations and Prioritizing Self-Care
35:20 Communicating Needs and Understanding Each Other
37:30 Reflection and Gratitude
02:30 The Importance of Effective Communication
08:15 Active Listening and Empathy
15:45 Non-Verbal Communication
22:10 Cultural Sensitivity and Communication
29:20 Overcoming Communication Barriers
35:10 Conclusion
PODCAST HOST
Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, but is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller. Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion. She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren’t alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges. Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for HSPs that focus on understanding what it means to be an HSP, self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you
CO-HOST BIO
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC has been a psychotherapist for 20 years. She specializes in helping Highly Sensitive People thrive in love, work, and parenting Highly Sensitive Children. Jen is passionate about using mindfulness and compassion-based approaches to ameliorate human suffering.
LINKS
Jen’s Links
Email: Jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com
Jen’s website: https://heartfulnessconsulting.com/
Patricia’s Links
HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/
Receive the top 10 most downloaded episodes of the podcast-- https://www.subscribepage.com/e6z6e6
Sign up for the Newsletter-- https://www.subscribepage.com/y0l7d4
To write a review in itunes:
- click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2
- select “listen on Apple Podcasts”
- chose “open in itunes”
- choose “ratings and reviews”
- click to rate the number of starts
- click “write a review”
Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com
Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/
Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/
Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/
Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber
Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv
e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com
Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive
Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com