Becoming Centered

This podcast is a field guide for professionals seeking perspectives and techniques for helping others find their balanced path. It’s also for people who want to learn the self-counseling pathways, navigation tools, and practices to live a centered life. Organized into several series, this podcast focuses on: (1) understanding the territory of personal psychology, (2) tools and techniques for counseling others in how to develop a centered and balanced life, and (3) tools and techniques for navigating your own emotional, cognitive, behavioral, and self-regulation challenges.

45. Supervision1 - Unit Coordinator Roles 01/21/2025

44. Processing3 - Chaining 01/11/2025

43. Processing2 - Basic Cognitive Processing 01/02/2025

42. Processing1 - Introduction to Processing 12/23/2024

42. Processing1 - Introduction to Processing Episode 42 of the Becoming Centered Podcast is the first episode on the Processing Pathway. Processing involves a structured approach to helping children and youth to mentally process their incidents of problem-behaviors. This episode introduces the concept of there being different ways that different parts of the brain process sensory data, personal experience, and the communications received from the other parts of the brain. This can result in various parts of the brain experiencing different types of confusion after a significant incident of problem-behaviors. Processing is intended to clear up that confusion. It's intended to help kids become more thougtful people who think before they automatically react to their own strong feelings with extreme behaviors. This is achieved through leading kids, once they are generally calm, through a structured process of analyzing their own incidents. In formal processing, there's typically a written form that guides children and youth through a meaningful way to understand an episode of problem-behaviors. The formal approach focuses on four goals: having kids own their own problem-behaviors, identifying feelings that drove those behaviors, identifying how those behaviors may have impacted people around them, and developing a plan for handling themselves better in the future. Residential Treatment Programs are encouraged to require formal processing, at a level appropriate for each individual child, for incidents involving serious problem-behaviors such as violence, major threats, and major disruptions. Informal processing typically doesn't use a form but has the same general goals. Informal processing makes sense for less significant problem-behaviors like instigating and refusing to follow basic program expectations. Informal processing is likely to be conducted only on a verbal level, and the counselor uses their judgement to decide how many of the four processing goals will be a focus of the conversation. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/34591785

41. Season 2 - Overview 12/17/2024

41. Season 2 - Overview Episode 41 of the Becoming Centered Podcast kicks off season 2 of this effort to spread knowledge about professional residential treatment of children and youth. This season is organized into two different educational pathways, mirroring consulting work being done. The Processing pathway is all about how to help kids process their own use of problem-behaviors. Typically, their own incidents and experiences leave parts of their brains confused about what has happened. They will come up with some way to understand, but often times their framing of what led to their misbehaviors doesn't support positive character development and increased self-regulation. With structured guidance from staff, they can learn how to understand their own patterns of behaviors in a way that leads to increased self-control and self-regulation of feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. The Unit Supervision pathway starts with a focus on how to create the time for all direct-care staff to receive several hours of individual supervision each month. It then moves on to how to structure the supervision time and then what content to cover in supervision. It presents a combination of management training and techniques, tools, and perspectives for how to teach counseling skills. This pathway recognizes that in-service trainings, and podcasts, are not the most effective way to promote professional development among residential staff. Rather, in-the-moment coaching and regularly individual supervision sessions are, by far, the most effective way to raise the skill levels and performance of direct-care staff. This series will focus on the management and counseling skills needed to provide quality individual supervision. This episode also presents a couple concepts for residential staff to consider. The first is the distinction between providing Care and providing Treatment. The second is a way to distinguish between providing Counseling and providing Therapy. While the podcast episodes will continue to be available on most podcast hosting sites, this season's episodes will tend to have more written support materials that listeners can download from the website Podcast page. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/34486655

40. Residential Counselor 101 Pt. 7 - Resilience to Traumatic Stress 06/05/2024

40. Residential Counselor 101 Pt. 7 - Resilience to Traumatic Stress Psychological Debriefing is a technique for reducing the impact of traumatic stress after a neurologically intense experience. On a neuropsychological level that experience could be anything that triggers a release of certain hormones such as cortisol (known as “the stress hormone”) and adrenaline. On a behavioral level that typically includes situations such as being involved in a physical intervention, being exposed to aggressive posturing, being yelled at, or really any situation that triggers significant danger signals in your body. Exactly what moves a person significantly out of their comfort zone is going to differ from person to person based on individual physiology and psychology. Exposure to traumatic stress does not automatically result in serious mental health conditions such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. However, traumatic stress has a cumulative effect and can trigger pre-existing PTSD. Symptoms of PTSD include: Aggressive or emotional outbursts Nightmares and/or flashbacks Heart palpitations, trembling hands, or sweating A sense of self-blame, worthlessness, shame, or guilt Acute or chronic unexplained physical pain Avoidance of people, things, or situations related to traumatic event Jumpiness Difficulty with sleep, eating, or physical intimacy Digestion disruptions Weakened immune system Low mood Headaches Social isolation Feeling empty or hopeless Loss of interest in activities Irritability Distrust of others or the world Dissociation The symptoms of traumatic stress are less extreme. However, because stress is stored in the body, impacting all sorts of neurological and physiological regulatory systems, it’s important to take steps to reduce its impact on staff. There’s something about being exposed to intense negative experiences that parts of the brain have great difficulty processing. Typically, during such incidents the parts of the brain that are responsible for your sense of time do not function at 100%. Thus, an objectively short incident might feel like it was much longer and have a bigger impact on you. Likewise, your ability to remember the exact sequence of what happened becomes impaired. The result is that afterwards, there’s parts of your brain that feel confused about what just happened. That sense of confusion can lead to perseverative thoughts. So, as you commute home, you keep running the incident over and over again in your head. Part of you is trying to process, to make sense of, what happened. However, memories of intense situations are stored based on their emotional impact. So, you start to feel emotional in thinking about what happened earlier, and that in turn impairs your ability to process it. Round and round your thoughts go, without any real resolution. In the meantime, the stress builds up, and is stored, in your muscles and nervous system, eventually impacting your immune system and other regulatory mechanisms in your body. One of the most effective and practical ways to lessen that effect is through the regular use of Psychological Debriefing. There’s four things that help reduce the impact of traumatic stress. Overwriting the emotional load of the traumatic memories. Clarifying the sequence of events. Feeling cared for and respected. Use of self-centering techniques. Neuropsychological research supports practice-wisdom suggesting that the exact timing of debriefing doesn’t matter, in terms of its effectiveness. Sometimes, it can be done right after an incident. However, it also works to reduce the impact of traumatic stress even hours later. Nevertheless, as a rule of thumb, it’s best if Psychological Debriefing can occur before the shift ends. Otherwise, perseverating, repeatedly running through what happened in your own head, tends to reinforce the traumatic emotions tied to the memory. You can try to debrief outside of work, but you’ll soon learn that family and friends can’t really relate to what you’re describing and are left simply questioning why you would do such work in the first place! Instead, what’s most helpful is to have a fellow staff person, ideally a shift leader or supervisor, but really it can be any staff person, simply attentively listen as you describe what happened. Overwriting the emotional load of traumatic memories: When you describe, in a relatively calm fashion, what happened in a stressful incident, you begin the process of overwriting the emotional load of traumatic memories. Essentially what’s happening in your brain is that you are taking the memory of the stressful event, with it’s intense emotional load, and overwriting that memory with a new memory of describing the incident to someone else, with a much reduced emotional load. In this way, some of the emotional power, the sting, of the memory is reduced. Later, recalling what happened is less likely to trigger the intense emotions originally experienced. Instead, that recall is tempered by the memory of calmly describing what happened to a colleague. To some extent, writing up the incident can serve the same purpose. However, on an emotional level, the memory of calmly writing an incident report is not as powerful as a memory of verbally describing what happened. Debriefing with an attentive colleague works best. The key is that the description of what happened should, at least initially, focus on the behaviors and not on the staff person’s emotions. The idea is to be able to recount what happened while experiencing a relatively calm state-of-mind. Clarifying the Sequence of Events: Because the parts of the brain that keep track of time tend to get shut off during intense situations, the more cognitive parts of the brain can be left feeling somewhat confused about the exact sequence of events that took place. Again, sticking to a description of the actions that occurred during the incident being debriefed can be helpful for restoring that sense of sequence which helps the person being debriefed feel more oriented and centered. It's not uncommon to debrief a group of people simultaneously who were all involved in some intense incident. Often times some staff people will not have been aware of what was happening with others on the team. Again, a review of that together is orienting and centering. It should be a clear expectation that shift leaders will debrief any critical incidents before sending staff home. Debriefing can, sometimes, be done very briefly, in just a minute or two. It can also be done as a small group, and sometimes can be blended with the writing of the incident report. Feeling Cared For and Respected: To some extent simply attentively listening to a staff person’s description of what occurred will make them feel cared for and respected. That has a huge impact on reducing the impact of traumatic stress. However, it may make sense to ask a few questions. After incidents that involved physical intervention, it’s helpful to ask the staff if anyone was hurt or injured. Frequently, staff members will ignore minor scrapes and bruises that don’t require medical attention. However, being able to share these sorts of minor injuries has psychological / emotional benefit. In some cases, staff will have become injured to an extent that should be reported and they need to be encouraged to do that follow through. Sometimes a staff person will be embarrassed that they received some minor injury. Normalizing that performing physical interventions are difficult can be helpful. Likewise, sometimes a staff person is very unhappy about some aspect of their own performance during a physical intervention. Again, normalizing that this is an extremely difficult part of the job can be emotionally supportive and helpful. Simply asking the staff person how they’re doing can be helpful. From a trauma mitigation perspective, their answer is less important than their experiencing being asked. Having supportive teammates who care about your well-being is a huge trauma protective factor. As the debriefer, it is not your role to solve any problems, to brainstorm other things the staff person could have done in the incident, or to analyze the actions or motivations of the clients involved in the incident. Instead, it is the debriefer’s role to attentively listen and to be generally emotionally supportive. Sometimes a staff person may be so emotionally impacted by an incident that follow up in individual supervision would be helpful. Psychological Debriefing is intended to help, but is intended to be relatively brief. Suggesting that a staff person bring up what happened in their next supervision may be good advice, or in some cases letting the person’s supervisor know that some follow up would be helpful is part of being a caring and professional colleague. Use of Centering Techniques: The impact of traumatic stress can be greatly lessened by the use of various centering techniques. Staff members should be encouraged to use these sorts of strategies to help manage their own stress. Psychological Debriefing can reinforce the use these actions and of acquiring a sophisticated understanding of traumatic stress. Immediately after a traumatically stressful incident, it’s helpful for staff to attend to their own basic needs. Sometimes, it’s helpful to be cued to do this by a colleague. Basic needs include things like hydrating, using a bathroom, stretching a little, or perhaps taking a short break. These things signal your body that the crisis is over and that your physiology can return to baseline. During Psychological Debriefing, the debriefer can ask if the incident took that staff person by surprise or was something they were able to partly anticipate. Intense situations that occur without anticipation tend to be more traumatically stressful. Likewise, the debriefer can ask if the staff person felt that their training prepared them for the incident. Feeling trained and some level of competence in an intense situation will tend to result in less traumatic stress being experienced. Gaps in training can be brought to the attention of supervisors for future improved training. Asking the staff person about their own body awareness during the incident can be helpful. Maintaining an awareness of your own muscle tension, breathing, heart rate, and other internal reactions can help you feel in control and can reduce the impact of the traumatic stress. Asking the staff person if they felt supported by their teammates during the incident can also be helpful. Many times the staff person will report that they did feel supported and their recognition of that will help to lessen some of the lingering effects of the traumatic stress. If a staff person didn’t feel supportive, that’s important information for the rest of the team and for supervisors so that teamwork improvements can be made. There are numerous relaxation, meditation, and mindfulness exercises that can be helpful after exposure to traumatic stress. Staff members should be taught some of these techniques and encouraged to use them after being exposed to traumatic stress. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/31581587

39. Residential Counselor 101 Pt. 6 - Empathy vs. Processing & Coping Activities 05/22/2024

39. Residential Counselor 101 Pt. 6 - Empathy vs. Processing & Coping Activities Coping Activities Diversions – any hobby or activity that engages your attention. Writing, drawing, painting, crafts Listening to music, playing an instrument, singing, dancing, acting Gardening Taking a walk, or going for a drive Watching television or a movie Guided Imagery Meditations Playing a game Shopping Reading Taking a break or vacation Tension Releasers Going on a walk Exercising Breathing Exercises Playing sports Systematic Muscle Relaxation Playing a musical instrument Taking a hot shower or bath Eating a little chocolate Crying Laughing Singing Organizing Tasks – any activity that involves ordering things. Cleaning Organizing your environment Putting things away Sudoku, Crossword puzzles, Jigsaw puzzles Update your calendar Outline the steps in a project Cognitive Coping Skills Making lists (Pro-Con, Goals, Ideas) Brainstorming solutions Managing your expectations Considering an inspirational quote Being flexible Consciously changing your attitude Rewarding yourself for successes Analyzing a situation Reframing a problem to be an opportunity Social or Interpersonal Coping Strategies Talking to someone you trust Writing a note to someone you care about Spending time with friends or family Serving someone in need Caring for or play with a pet Role-playing challenging situations with others Encouraging others Physical Maintenance Strategies Getting enough sleep Eating healthy foods Getting into a good routine Limiting caffeine and alcohol Taking medication as prescribed Deep / slow breathing Limit Setting Dropping some activities if you’re over-extended Setting boundaries and saying "no" Prioritizing important tasks Scheduling time for yourself Being assertive to the demands of others Spiritually Fulfilling Activities Praying Meditating Enjoying nature Getting involved in a worthy cause Experiencing appreciation or gratitude Negative Coping Actions Diversions Procrastination – putting off important tasks Misusing drugs or alcohol as self-medicating Wasting time on unimportant tasks Tension Releasers Tantrums Throwing things at people Hitting people Yelling at others Destroying property Speeding or driving recklessly Social or Interpersonal Strategies Blaming others Isolating or withdrawing Mean or hostile joking Putting down others behind their back Criticizing others to their face Manipulating others Refusing help from others Lying to other people Sabotaging other people’s plans Being late to appointments Provoking violence from others Enabling others to take advantage of you Physical Suicidal Gestures Self-harm Excessive exercise Developing illnesses Abusing drugs or alcohol Over-Indulging Spending too much Gambling Eating too much Continually crying Cognitive Strategies Denying any problem Stubbornness or inflexibility All or nothing, black or white, thinking Blaming yourself and others Catastrophizing Unproductive Repetitive Thoughts Hiding or Burying Your Feelings Withdrawing or Isolating Name-Calling Self-Diminishing Making excessive fun of yourself Self-sabotaging behaviors Blaming yourself Thoughts and behaviors that suggest that you deserve to feel bad or overwhelmed /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/31405647

38. Residential Counselor 101 Pt. 5 - Scout Skills & Processing 05/15/2024

38. Residential Counselor 101 Pt. 5 - Scout Skills & Processing The Aspect Compass, part of the Meta-Compass Model, divides areas of the brain and aspects of the psyche into four parts called: The Artist, The Scout, The Warrior, and The Chief. The Artist represents those parts of the brain and psyche that understand the world in terms of emotions. The Artist communicates, in terms of feelings and moods, to the rest of the brain. Helping The Artist feel centered involves making The Artist feel heard and seen. Creative arts activities can be emotionally centering activities. Co-Regulating with others and Experiencing empathy from others is especially centering. Empathic Listening is a great technique for helping clients to experience empathy. The Scout represents those parts of the brain and psyche that are tasked with exploring the world, trying to make sense of it, and reporting back to the rest of the brain. The Scout tends to over-analyze and can become very disorganized (in other words, thinking becomes disorganized). Having clients exercise the Scout skills of Accurate Listening and Accurate Reporting are centering for this part of the psyche. Listening Checks are an effective tool for teaching Accurate Listening. Teaching Accurate Reporting often times involves using Clarifying Questions to help them describe a full sequence of events in the proper chronological order. It includes encouraging kids to report whatever happened in a calm tone of voice (exercising Reaction Inhibition and Stress Tolerance). Having kids Identify More Than One Possible Explanation for why something has occurred or someone has done something helps them exercise the executive skill of Flexibility. The Warrior represents those parts of the brain and psyche that are in charge of both external behaviors and internal physiological actions. If The Warrior is heightened, it is very difficult for the Scout to function (in other words, if a kid is still agitated they’re not going to be able to access their best thinking). The Warrior tends to automatically react (especially internally) to whatever The Artist is communicating. So to help The Scout improve at processing events, The Warrior and The Artist need to first be relatively calm. The Chief represents those parts of the brain and psyche that are in charge of regulating The Artist, The Scout, and The Warrior. The Chief uses Executive Skills (and some other abilities such as Beliefs and Values) to influence a person’s feelings, thinking, and behaviors. Processing is a technique designed to strengthen a kid’s inner Chief and inner Scout. It can be done throughout the residential day, but especially makes sense to use after an incident involving problem behaviors. Once a kid has been separated from the group and has generally calmed down, Processing provides a structured way to turn what happened into a learning experience. Processing is customized to the developmental level of the client. Some clients may only do the first step of processing, while other clients are capable of doing much more. 1. The first step in Processing an incident is to get the client to own up to their own behaviors. That’s literally admitting to having done what problem behaviors resulted in their being separated from the group. This is best done without evoking feelings of shame and guilt. Those feelings get in the way of cognitive processing. In other words, those feelings make it harder to the kid to think about what happened and to learn from it. 2. The second step in Processing is done with clients who developmentally are able to identify some feelings and/or thoughts that were part of the problem behavior incident. The goal is the same as step 1 – to get the kid’s inner Chief to accept Responsibility for their own behaviors, feelings, and thoughts. 3. The third step in Processing, to the extent the client is developmentally able, is to help them identify what they could have done differently and what they could do next time a similar situation arises. 4. The fourth step switches from a focus on personal responsibility to looking at Social Responsibility. This step involves having the kid identify what impact they think their behaviors had on people around them. 5. The fifth step moves beyond verbally accepting Responsibility to performing some action related to Relationship Repair. That might be a simple verbal apology, an apology card, or might be a Restitution such as beautifying a space, doing an extra chore that benefits others, or any other symbolic gesture showing that they want to be a positive member of the group. Restitution systems can be a powerful structure within a residential treatment program but need to be designed for a general level of consistency. The basic rationale behind Restitution is that you did something that made it more unpleasant for other people to live and work here; so now do something that makes it more pleasant for others. This is largely a symbolic action and shouldn’t take more than 10 to 15 minutes (in general). It provides kids with a great sense of closure that an incident has been resolved and that they can get a fresh start. 6. The sixth step goes even further in holding kids accountable to their living group, by having them review their processing with a group of peers and staff in a Group Explanation. The main purpose of the group is for the client to publicly accept responsibility for their own problem behaviors and to check the accuracy of their thoughts on how they impacted others. Two to five peers, who’ve been coached in some boundaries on giving feedback, then share how they were actually impacted and potentially give some constructive advice. It takes a certain level of skill to facilitate a Group Explanation group; however, this skill can be learned by any residential staff. Setting up a Group Explanation system requires programmatic support so that this extremely powerful intervention is run in a consistent and productive fashion. If a physical Processing Form is used, that paper can serve as a helpful guide for a client to present at a Group Explanation. It can work well to have some restriction on privileges in place until a client completes any Relationship Repair / Restitution or Group Explanation expectations. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/31254722

37. Residential Counselor 101 Pt. 4 - Executive Skills & Labeling 05/08/2024

37. Residential Counselor 101 Pt. 4 - Executive Skills & Labeling Executive Skills are abilities that part of the brain can develop that used to regulate other parts of the brain. There’s two Executive Skills that describe ways that the emotional parts of the brain are regulated. Reaction Inhibition is the ability to stop yourself from automatically reacting. More specifically, it’s the ability to stop the action-focused parts of the brain, what I call the inner Warrior, from mindlessly reacting to the emotions being communicated by the parts of the brain I call the inner Artist. Your body will have internal behaviors in reaction to every feeling you have. However, developing Reaction Inhibition means not externally acting out every feeling. It means giving yourself a split second to think before acting. Stress Tolerance is the ability to sit with various emotions without acting them out. It’s the ability to experience feelings, even potentially strong feelings, without becoming so overwhelmed that you can no longer think straight. Kids in residential treatment have had difficult lives and their emotional states reflect that. As a counselor, you can’t change their past and you can’t “fix” their feelings. What you can do is help them develop their ability to tolerate their own feelings in a way where they continue to be able to make thoughtful choices about their behaviors. There’s several executive abilities that help you control, modulate, and regulate your thoughts. Planning is being able to map out how to reach your goals or complete a task. It includes being able to make decisions about what to focus on and what’s not so important. Like other skills, exercise / practice leads to development. So cue your clients to plan ahead, to think about what’s next on the schedule and how to prepare for it. This isn’t developed through the creation of large multi-day complex tasks. Instead, it’s developed through the everyday little changes in the schedule that can be done thoughtfully instead of mindlessly. Prioritizing is being able to weigh two or more different choices and then picking one. Again, it’s exercised through all the small decisions – it’s teaching kids to make thoughtful choices. Organizing is creating and maintaining systems to keep track of information or materials. It doesn’t matter what you’re having kids organize – whether it’s their bedroom, their backpack, an activity, or putting away toys. The act of organizing exercises their inner Chief. Sustained Attention is being able to maintain your attention despite distractibility, fatigue, or boredom. There’ll be large differences among kids in their ability to do this, and for any one kid it can be different at different times. However, it’s like a muscle – when you inspire kids to pay attention a little bit longer, a little bit better than what comes naturally to them – they will get better at it. Time Management is being able to estimate how long various tasks will take, and how to stay within time limits and deadlines. This is a part of the Chief’s self-monitoring ability; however, it’s directed outward (at the passage of time) rather than inward. Having kids be aware of how much time is left in an activity, of when another part of the schedule is due to begin, or how long it takes to complete various tasks, exercises their inner Chief and will contribute to the Chief becoming better at self-regulation. Task Initiation is being able to begin projects without undue procrastination, in an efficient and timely fashion. In general, most kids are not great at task initiation and living in a residential program can actually make that situation even worse. Typically, there’s a lot more structure and there’s a whole bunch of adults to cue kids to start various tasks. It’s easier to just wait for someone else to tell you what to do or how to start. However, like other skills, it’s through practice that kids get better at task initiation. So, as a counselor, ask questions like “What needs to happen to start this activity?”, rather than just telling kids what to do. Flexibility is being able to revise plans and adapt to changed circumstances. Residential treatment can become so structured that it becomes inflexible. That’s not helpful for developing thoughtful kids. So, encourage some amount of flexibility in the how kids think and in how they act. Typically, there’s plenty of disruptions to the usual routine, so there’s lots of opportunities to encourage and praise flexibility. Self-Awareness is being able to monitor yourself in real time. This skill involves having one part of your mind that is observing other parts of your mind that are generating and experiencing feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. Self-Awareness is the foundational skill for a person being able to take charge of their own brain. Labeling is a great technique for increasing Self-Awareness and for helping clients become more thoughtful people. Labeling can be thought of as narrating what kids are doing as they’re doing it – sort of play-by-play announcing. Another way to think of this technique to imagine the a snapshot of what a kid is doing and the labeling is the descriptive caption underneath the picture. There’s variations on the labeling technique, but in its purest form it can be thought of as labeling observable behaviors. This is done without any judgmental tone, without praise or criticism. It’s simply stating what you see kids doing, in-the-moment. It’s probably the single tool that should be used the most by Residential Counselors. You can combine labeling with praise, although that’s going to be less targeted at increasing self-awareness, but might be better at increasing self-esteem. You can also label behaviors in a way that intended to promote social skills or character development. You can also label feelings – however, keep in mind that most people don’t like being told by someone else how they feel. So when labeling feelings, it’s generally best to do it in the form of a question. The goal of that question is to increase the client’s self-awareness, not to solve some problem. Finally, one of the most powerful uses of labeling is to use it instead of directives or directly setting limits. Labeling can be a really powerful way to get kids to be thoughtfully cooperative rather than mindlessly compliant. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/31179267

36. Residential Counselor 101 pt. 3 - Co-Regulation & Empathic Listening 04/24/2024

36. Residential Counselor 101 pt. 3 - Co-Regulation & Empathic Listening Posture: The parts of the brain that control the physical body (the inner Warrior) and the parts of the brain that operate in terms of emotions (the inner Artist) are tightly linked in the brain. Changes in one automatically trigger changes in the other. So, getting kids to become more aware of their posture, and to habitually adopt good posture, supports being in a positive emotionally state-of-mind. The art is being able to frequently help kids improve their posture without it becoming obnoxious. Co-Regulation: When you synchronize your nervous system and a client’s nervous system. This is most easily done through high energy activities such as playing an active game together; however, it can also happen in quieter moments such as watching something engaging together. When kids co-regulate with a relatively organized adult, they are exercising the same parts of their brain that are involved in self-regulating. If they get skilled enough at self-regulation, they still may require treatment, but would no longer need to receive that treatment in an institutional setting. Empathic Listening: The goals of Empathic Listening are two-fold. The first is to create a co-regulating experience for the client. The second is to leave the client feeling like their feelings are understood by you. That’s the heart of empathy – being able to feel what another person is feelings. There’s seven steps to Empathic Listening: 1. Mirroring – match the client’s general body language and speech (speed and tonality). Slightly lead the client toward lower and slower physiology and speech. 2. Intense listening – use body language, gestures, and small verbal cues to convey that you are intensely listening. One “trick” you can use to help yourself slip into conveying intense listening is to speak and carry yourself as if you were trying to memorize what the client is saying. 3. Ask clarifying questions in a non-judgmental fashion – convey that your interest is in understanding the client. Do not just repeat what the kid has said; rephrase the highlights or key points, taking care to not distort the meaning. a. Can I just clarify? You're saying that … b. Am I understanding you correctly; you’re saying… c. Let me make sure I've got this right; you're saying … d. A lot of times people use the same word a little differently. What do you mean by… 4. Focusing on emotions – ask clarifying questions to inspire the client to share the emotional content of what they’re saying. Take care to not tell kids how they are feeling. Often times, adopting an air of curious confusion can be helpful for getting kids to elaborate on their emotions. Adopting a non-judgmental tone is again crucial. Remember, feelings don’t have to be logical, they just are. You’re trying to get the client to talk about their feelings. a. When you said that made you “angry”… what do you mean by that? Is that something you feel in your body? b. When you say you’re “upset”… I’m not sure I really know quite what you mean? Help me understand better…. c. When you say “it’s unfair,” I could kind of guess at what exactly you mean, but I don’t really want to guess. Could you explain that? 5. Avoid problem-solving – it can be incredibly tempting to steer the conversation into problem-solving. Don’t do that. That shifts the kid from speaking from an emotional place to using the more analytical parts of the brain. That’s a key point of Processing, which is a separate tool, from Empathic Listening. The goal of Empathic Listening is to create a sense of connection and a therapeutic alliance. It’s much more powerful, and in most situations more therapeutic, to simply leave the client with a feeling of being understood, and sitting together with the feelings, than thinking that your role is to help them solve some problems. 6. Avoid the “empathizing equals agreeing with” trap – sometimes an Empathic Listening session can include a kid complaining about other adults. It is wise to be explicit that while you think you understand what they’re saying, that doesn’t necessarily mean that you agree with their characterizations of others. Done skillfully, if you’ve established a rapport, this distinction will be accepted by kids without breaking the rapport you’ve established. 7. Plug the client back into program structures – while it’s not necessarily “wrong” to end an Empathic Listening session with Problem Solving, that can take away from the power of the Empathic Listening. Instead, it is often times preferable to end the session by acknowledging that the emotional issues that were shared are not something that can be solved, and then directing / assisting them to engage in whatever scheduled structures are currently the group’s focus (e.g. “I really appreciate you sharing some really difficult feelings with me; I hope on some level you also found that helpful. I think the best thing to do now is to switch gears to the schedule, which right now would be bed prep.”). /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/30967338

35. Residential Counselor 101 pt. 2 - The Aspect Compass 04/10/2024

35. Residential Counselor 101 pt. 2 - The Aspect Compass The vertical axis of the Seven-Directions Meta-Compass Model, represents the core functions involved in caring for children who are literally placed in the care of a residential treatment program. The Upward direction (Relationships) involves all the activities a Residential Counselor does to care for the kids. These are things that have to happen simply because the clients are children, regardless of whatever individual treatment issues a client presents. The Downward direction (Task Responsibilities) involves all the tasks involved in caring for the kids, caring for the facility, and being an employee. The Inward (Self) direction involves caring for oneself, so that you have the energy to care for the kids. Although there’s an overlap between Care and Treatment; the horizontal plane of the compass represents four aspects of treatment involved in being a residential counselor. The East cardinal position represents the domain of emotions. It’s symbolized by the aspect of The Artist. The Artist is made up of those parts of the brain and psyche that only process the world and communicate in terms of emotions. That’s how those parts of the brain work. The South cardinal position represents the domain of cognitions. It’s symbolized by the aspect of The Scout. Unlike The Artist, The Scout possesses lots of words and engages in thinking, analysis, and has a purpose of exploring the world, interpreting what it finds, and reporting back to the rest of the brain. The West cardinal position represents the domain of behaviors (both external actions and internal physiological actions). It’s symbolized by the aspect of The Warrior. The Warrior expresses all The Artist’s feelings and all the Scout’s thoughts as external and internal behaviors. The North cardinal position represents the domain of executive skills that are used to regulate the rest of the brain. It’s symbolized by the aspect of The Chief. The Chief is concerned with centering The Artist, The Scout, and The Warrior. The Chief regulates the tribe (the different parts of the psyche) and also is concerned with a person’s relationships with other people (the external tribe). The podcast delves into understanding the brain's functioning, emphasizing the practice effect wherein repeated actions reinforce neural pathways. It stresses the importance of fostering calm feelings, thoughts, and behaviors in children through positive experiences and repetition. The discussion outlines the interconnectedness of different aspects of the psyche: emotions (East), cognitions (South), behaviors (West), and executive skills (North). It highlights the role of residential staff in creating a therapeutic milieu and inspiring internal changes in children's brains to manage problem behaviors effectively. Respectful treatment is emphasized as essential for creating a therapeutic environment, contrasting coercive approaches that may yield short-term compliance but hinder long-term transformation. The episode concludes with a preview of forthcoming tools and techniques to help children achieve emotional centeredness, laying the foundation for further cognitive and behavioral growth. Other Key Concepts The Practice Effect: Feelings, moods, and even thinking, work the same way in the brain as behaviors. Whatever states-of-mind are practiced become easier to achieve. Practicing becoming emotionally, cognitively, and behaviorally centered will transform a person’s brain. The Intensity Effect: Intense feelings create lasting changes in the brain. This is why a single traumatic incident, let alone the multiple traumas that are common among kids in residential treatment, have a lasting effect on the kids’ brains (unless effective treatment occurs). Respect Doesn’t Have to Be Earned: In a treatment environment it’s important that staff consistently treat the kids with respect. It is likely that many of the kids will not consistently treat staff respectfully. That makes being respectful to the kids a challenge that requires personal maturity and professionalism. Kids experiencing the adults consistently treating them with respect will, over time, be a key component to the clients feeling safe enough and trusting enough to try new behaviors. The Artist part of each child’s psyche has a primal fear that the world is too harsh to survive. Counselors will be most effective at treatment when they respect that fear and don’t add to it with harsh interactions. Seeking Compliance is Behavior Management, not Treatment: Sometimes kids in residential treatment exhibit such outrageous and unsafe behaviors that managing those behaviors has to take priority over treatment. However, effective behavior management only trains kids in how to be successful within the artificial environment of an institutional setting. Treatment involves transformational change that carries over to when kids are living back in the community. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/30758443

34. Residential Counselor 101 pt. 1 - Science, Art, and Craft 03/20/2024

34. Residential Counselor 101 pt. 1 - Science, Art, and Craft The Role of a Residential Counselor: Care and Treatment CARE: Relationships: A core responsibility is to attend to the care, well-being, and safety of the clients. This requires caring and respectful relationships between staff and clients. Self: In order to take care of the clients, you have to be able to take care of yourself. This work is very stressful and your ability to become centered will strongly effect your ability to help the kids become centered. Task Responsibilities: A Residential Counselor has numerous core tasks related to the implementation of program structures, care of the facility, and reporting requirements. TREATMENT: Emotions: In the East cardinal position of the treatment compass, this domain represents the parts of the brain, and the parts of the mind or psyche, that understand the world and communicate in terms of emotions. Part of a counselor’s treatment role is to help clients become emotionally centered when their feelings and moods become too extreme, too intense, too unstable, or too restricted. Cognitions: In the South, this domain represents the parts of the brain and psyche that understand the world and communicate in terms of thinking. Part of a counselor’s treatment role is to help clients become cognitively centered when their thinking is disorganized. Behaviors: In the West, this domain represents the parts of the brain and psyche that understand the world and communicate in terms of both external actions and internal physiological activity. Part of a counselor’s treatment role is to help clients become behaviorally and physiologically centered when their actions and bodies become too extreme or chaotic. Executive Skills: In the North, this domain represents the parts of the brain and psyche that regulate the other parts of the brain and body. Part of a counselor’s treatment role is to serve as the kids’ executive skills, support their emerging skills, and inspire the development of their executive skills so that they can successfully self-regulate and no longer need residential treatment. Self: At the center of the treatment compass is the self. In addition to needing to take care of themselves, so that they can care effectively for the kids, from a treatment perspective residential counselors need to be skilled at becoming centered themselves. Those abilities, to be highly resilient and to set the tone, will help the kids learn how to become centered. Other Key Concepts Counseling: Where therapy is has a strong interest in helping people make connections between their past and present, and tends to directly focus on issues related to grief and trauma; counseling tends to be more focused on the present – on how the client is functioning in-the-moment. Neuropsychology: Neurology is the study of the brain and nervous system. Psychology is the study of the mind or psyche. Neuropsychology studies and explains the connections between neurology and psychology. The Human Brain: This complex organ is made up of different parts that have unique shapes, functions, and ways of processing sensory data. Likewise, different parts of the brain have different ways of communicating to rest of the brain. Via the spine, nerve pathways, and blood vessels, the brain is connected to all the other parts of the body. There are glands throughout the body that produce various chemicals that change how the brain functions. Although only a metaphor, you can think of these chemicals as corresponding with feelings and moods, while the electrical system of the brain corresponds with thinking. The Practice Effect: Anything you practice, your brain gets better at doing. This not only applies to actions, like bouncing a ball, but to feelings and moods. Practice getting angry and you’ll more easily be able to get into that state-of-mind. Practice being happy and you’ll ore easily be able to get into that state-of-mind. Co-Regulating: This term refers to how two people who are doing the same activity, side-by-side, will start to synchronize their nervous systems. Human Beings start out life dependent on co-regulation to manage their infant feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. As those parts of the brain get used, the practice effect kicks in, and a person starts being able to better self-regulate. The Artist: This is what I call the parts of the brain, and the parts of the psyche, that only understand the world and communicate in terms of emotions. The Artist wants to be seen, and the artist wants to be heard. The Artist communicates, via feelings and moods, to get its needs met, using the only “language” it has – emotions. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/30444423

33. Groups 02/28/2024

33. Groups Effective residential treatment for troubled children and youth depends upon teamwork among both staff and residents. The goal is to transform a group of struggling kids into a supportive team. Many kids in these programs crave friendship, which is often lacking due to their life challenges and the displacement of residential treatment. A major goal in treatment programs is to help the child and youth clients learn how to make and keep friends. Residential treatment does a lot of that teaching through various group activities, including recreational, therapy-based, and house meetings. These gatherings require active participation from staff, beyond just facilitating. Staff members play roles like maintaining order, offering support to individual kids, and helping resolve conflicts. They also assist in therapeutic activities, like group explanations, where kids take responsibility for their actions and receive feedback. In recreational activities, staff involvement goes beyond observation. They engage as cheerleaders, referees, coaches, or announcers, aiming to boost kids' confidence and social skills. The concept of "therapeutic error" guides staff to adapt their participation level to the kids' abilities, fostering a positive experience for them. In therapy-based groups, staff provide support and modeling, helping kids manage their emotions and engage in the therapeutic process. While therapists lead these sessions, staff contribute by creating a supportive environment and assisting kids in staying focused. The most effective groups combine the role of the therapist in uncovering emotional pain with the role of the counselor in helping clients tolerate that pain. Overall, effective residential treatment relies on staff members actively engaging in various group settings, contributing to the therapeutic process, and fostering a sense of teamwork and support among the residents. Staff involvement goes beyond facilitation; it involves actively participating in activities, providing support, and guiding kids towards positive interactions and growth. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/30139758

32. Supervisor Orientation Pt. 3 02/14/2024

32. Supervisor Orientation Pt. 3 This podcast mini-series aims to aid residential staff who find themselves supervising shifts and providing individual supervision for residential counselors. It explores various aspects of these roles through the Seven-Directions Meta-Compass Model. Each episode focuses on a cardinal direction, representing different perspectives. Episode one emphasized supportive supervision (East) and the role of the supervisor as teacher (South). Episode two focused on coaching (West) and focused on teamwork (North). The current episode delves into the Upward perspective, addressing the relationship challenges of transitioning from peer to supervisor and maintaining professional boundaries. The importance of refraining from participating in negative venting among staff and instead focusing on problem-solving and promoting teamwork is stressed. The supervisor must navigate new boundaries and ensure that relationships with colleagues remain professional. The podcast then shifts to the Downward perspective of task responsibilities. It emphasizes the importance of checklists to keep track of various tasks, the importance of delegating effectively, and potentially addressing personnel issues involving productivity, attendance, and conduct. Next, it explores the Inward perspective, emphasizing self-care and professional development for both supervisors and supervisees. It highlights the role of the supervisor in supporting staff well-being and facilitating their growth. Finally, it offers a model for conducting individual supervision meetings, incorporating elements from all cardinal directions. It suggests starting with emotional support, moving to teaching and coaching, and then addressing teamwork, engagement with clients, and any other issues specific to any one supervisee. The series concludes by acknowledging the complexity of the supervisor role and the transformative impact it can have on both staff and clients in a residential treatment setting. It emphasizes the importance of continuous learning and growth in this role. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/29934963

31. Supervisor Orientation Pt. 2 02/07/2024

31. Supervisor Orientation Pt. 2 In this podcast episode, looking at the role of the Residential Supervisor shifts to the perspective of the West cardinal direction in the Meta-Compass Model. The West is the direction of behaviors, physiology, and for this podcast, especially is concerned with setting behavioral goals for supervisees. It’s suggested that setting behavioral goals be based on encouraging Residential Counselors to develop their own executive skills. Focusing on executive skills, and using the language of executive skills, helps separate out asking supervisees to develop their professional skills, versus language that makes supervisees feel like their supervisor is judging their character or personal development. Thus the supervisor encourages specific behaviors in staff members that correspond with exercising executive skills such as reaction inhibition and stress tolerance, crucial for maintaining emotional control during challenging situations. Likewise, the supervisor focuses on helping their supervisees improve their own planning, prioritizing, organizing, time management, initiation, and other cognitive executive skills. This focus on executive skills development, and really breaking it down to the behaviors that demonstrate an exercising of these skills, continues with helping supervisees with their goal-directed persistence (highly relevant to the reality that a lot of residential interventions only work after hundreds of repetitions), their self-awareness (which is the foundation of self-directed development), and meta-cognition (which corresponds with understanding the “thinking” of the program – its philosophy, treatment approaches, etc.). The podcast then shifts to the North cardinal position perspective on the Meta-Compass. The North, the domain of the Chief, is very concerned with teamwork and the well-being of their team-mates. Guidelines are presented for effectively encouraging the development of a high-functioning team. The Chief also has to, sometimes, set limits. It falls on the supervisor to monitor staff interactions with both clients and colleagues to ensure safety and adherence to workplace laws and program policies, procedures, and practices. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/29789288

30. Supervisor Orientation Pt. 1 01/31/2024

30. Supervisor Orientation Pt. 1 This podcast aims to guide residential staff taking on the role of supervising a shift, emphasizing the complexities involved in managing a group of kids and supporting a team of direct care staff. The role of a Residential Supervisor involves overseeing shifts, and in some agencies includes providing one-on-one office-based supervision, which includes conducting performance appraisals, managing personnel issues, and facilitating communication between staff and management. To organize this wide-ranging topic, the 7-Directions Meta-Compass Model, inspired by Native American concepts, is used as a framework to explore different aspects of the supervisor's role. The East represents emotions, focusing on the importance of emotional support, resilience, and passion for leadership. Values associated with the East are Respect and Caring. The Supervisor provides the staff team with executive functions, including Reaction Inhibition and Stress Tolerance. This sets the tone for their using those same executive skills with the kids. The importance of debriefing after intense experiences and fostering Stress Tolerance is highlighted. Moving to the South, which represents cognitions, the podcast emphasizes the role of the supervisor in imparting knowledge about program structures, schedules, behavior management, and treatment components. The Values associated with the South are Truth and Honesty. This episode delves into team-building, emphasizing the role of communication, feedback, appreciation, and celebration in developing a high-performing team. The Values associated with the South are Truth and Honesty. The Supervisor is responsible for providing the team with cognitive executive functions like Planning, Prioritizing, Organizing, Sustained Attention, Working Memory, Time Management, Task Initiation, and Flexibility. These functions are crucial for effective shift supervision. Upcoming episodes will explore the West, North, Upward, Downward, and Inward directions, covering behaviors, physiology, setting goals, relationships, tasks, and self-care. This mini-series provides guidance for Residential Supervisors, acknowledging the challenges and growth opportunities associated with the role. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/29615703

29. Managing Problem Behaviors 01/24/2024

29. Managing Problem Behaviors This podcast episode presents a system for managing behavior problems, utilizing a variety of interconnected tools and techniques. The concept of contagion is introduced, explaining how behaviors, feelings, and thoughts can spread among individuals. The importance of interrupting behavioral patterns is highlighted, particularly using a technique known as "pattern interrupts." These interrupts aim to prevent escalation and promote a return to baseline functioning. A detailed example of a structural pattern interrupt is provided, involving a campaign to reduce swearing among middle-school boys in a residential cottage. The podcast suggests the use of three types of time-outs: Structured Centering Break, Independent Centering Break, and Resets. Each type serves as a therapeutic consequence for a lack of self-control, allowing individuals to practice coping activities and centering exercises. The importance of tailoring interventions to individual needs, avoiding shaming, and promoting consistency is emphasized. Additionally, the establishment of a clear Code of Conduct based on values is recommended, with examples provided. The distinction between major and minor violations of the Code is discussed, along with a range of staff responses to minor violations. The goal is to intervene effectively while minimizing disruption to the group and the activity. The podcast underscores the developmental importance of allowing individuals to progress from Structured Centering Breaks to Independent Centering Breaks and Resets. The ultimate aim is to empower clients to independently manage their behaviors and develop self-control, contributing to their growth and success outside the treatment program. Structured Centering Breaks, which are used for all instances where major violations of the Code of Conduct have occurred, include a processing of the incident that focuses on taking responsibility for one's actions and feelings, followed by a discussion on relationship repair, restitution, fines, group explanations, and executive skills development as ways to achieve higher responsibility levels. This episode also takes a look at the use of restrictions, differentiating between those related to safety concerns and those as direct consequences of problem behaviors. The goal is to frame restrictions in a way that aligns with program goals beyond punishment, connecting them to therapeutic and treatment-driven objectives. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/29480338

28. Twelve Transformational Beliefs 01/17/2024

27. The Aspect Compass & Self-Talk 01/10/2024

27. The Aspect Compass & Self-Talk This podcast episode is intended to increase your awareness of Self-Talk and how you can coach your clients to use more effective and healthier Self-Talk. It uses the Aspect Compass (part of the Meta-Compass Model) to present different qualities of Self-Talk that appeal to the four cardinal aspects of your psyche called The Artist, The Scout, The Warrior, and The Chief. Using the Aspect Compass begins with the Artist (in the East), representing the domain of emotions. As children explore the world, the Scout (in the South) emerges, making associations and developing thoughts. The Warrior (in the West) handles challenging behaviors, responding to emotional cues from the Artist and thoughts from the Scout. Finally the Chief (in the North) emerges to coordinate and regulate the four aspects of your psyche. The Chief uses executive skills, like Reaction Inhibition and Stress Tolerance, to regulate the Artist. The Chief uses other executive skills, like planning, prioritizing, time management, and sustained attention to regulate the Scout. The Chief also regulates the Warrior with skills like goal-directed persistence, self-awareness, and meta-cognition. The Chief using Self-Talk, begins with caregiver messages early in life. The Chief internalizes this caregiver talk which turns into Self-Talk. For the Artist, with its limited vocabulary, tone of voice and simple words work best. On the other hand, The Scout responds best to coaching Self-Talk, which can be delivered in several different styles. The Warrior parts of the brain and psyche also don’t have a lot of vocabulary. The Warrior responds best to Self-Talk that is simple, direct, and directive. Residential staff using the Labeling technique support the development of the clients’ Chief aspect, which has to learn to monitor the other aspects, in other words to be self-aware of feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. Clients also benefit from increased awareness of negative Self-Talk. The Scout parts of the brain are designed to come up with observations, theories, and beliefs that explain the world. Asking yourself negative questions, like “Why am I so stupid?” will cause The Scout to look for explanations, evidence, and an answer. That answer is not based on any kind of objective truth and is likely to be demoralizing, disempowering, and self-destructive. The skilled residential counselor models empowering self-talk and uses it for personal stress management. The Chief's Self-Talk encouraging you to perceive others as whole beings, to act with integrity, and to encourage kindness teaches clients to develop their own Self-Talk to manage their own feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/29357043

26. Developing Executive Skills 01/03/2024

26. Developing Executive Skills In this podcast episode, the focus is on aiding children and youth in residential treatment to develop executive skills, which are crucial for regulating emotions, thinking, and behavior. Developing residents executive skills is essential because it’s their deficits in being able to regulate their own feelings, thoughts, and behaviors that accounts for why they need to live at a treatment program in order to receive services, instead of living in the community / with their families. Executive skills begin developing in childhood but can be delayed or overwhelmed by environmental challenges, trauma, deprivation, insufficient parenting, or neurological conditions. The key to improving executive skills lies in practice, with the brain becoming more adept at whatever skills it regularly engages in. The podcast introduces 13 executive skills, two of which are primarily focused on regulating emotions, eight of which are primarily focused on regulating thinking, and 3 of which are focused on regulating behaviors. Strategies are presented for developing reaction inhibition and stress tolerance, crucial for emotional regulation, include labeling and check-ins. Stress tolerance is further fostered through empathic listening, creative arts, journaling, and coping activities. Cognitive executive skills such as planning, prioritizing, organizing, sustained attention, time management, task initiation, working memory, and flexibility are explored. Practical techniques involve fostering autonomy in planning, using a choice model for prioritization, engaging in organizing tasks, and employing coping activities to enhance stress tolerance and several cognitive executive skills. Coping activities are divided into eight categories, including diversions, tension releasers, organizing tasks, cognitive coping skills, social coping skills, physical maintenance strategies, limit setting, and spiritually fulfilling activities. The podcast emphasizes the importance of teaching children positive coping activities while being aware of negative coping actions. Negative coping actions do work, in-the-moment, to help a person tolerate stress, however, they have longer-term self-destructive effects. These are things such as drug use, self-injurious behaviors, over-eating, and blaming people and yourself. Lastly, the podcast touches on additional executive skills such as goal-directed persistence, self-awareness, and meta-cognition. It highlights the role of residential staff in supporting children to stick to goals, improve self-awareness through labeling, and encourage meta-cognitive thinking by exploring motivations and intentions. Overall, the episode provides a comprehensive guide to helping children in residential treatment enhance their executive skills through intentional and practical interventions. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/29147333

25. The Eight Gifts 12/27/2023

24. Heroes, Courage, and Fear 12/20/2023

24. Heroes, Courage, and Fear This podcast builds off of the concept that, overall, our brains understand the totality of our life experiences as a story. It’s crucial for our mental health, and overall sense of becoming centered, to see ourselves as the hero of our own life-story. This is the situation for children and youth in residential treatment. Upon entering residential treatment, kids often feel at a low point, viewing their challenges as insurmountable. They need to become part of a classic story-line in which our young central character faces personal tragedy, separates from parents, finds mentors and friends, and undergoes growth to become the hero. The key quality for the hero needs is courage. Actions in the face of dangerous situations can show bravery, with or without the significant presence of fear. Courage, on the other hand, always involves facing fear. There cannot be courage without fear. A way to gain power over one’s personal fears is to be able to talk about fear in a more generalized fashion. This episode introduces the concept of the "Eight Fears of All Human Beings," placing them within the Meta-Compass Model used in other episodes of this podcast. These fears include the fear of the cold, being alone, the woods, the dark, animals, water, rot, and being judged. The discussion delves into each fear, its metaphorical meaning, and how addressing these fears both requires courage and nurtures courage. These fears can also be understood in the context of the developmental stages of life, cognitive processes, and behavioral responses. The goal is to empower clients in residential treatment to recognize their fears, recognize that they can face those fears with courage, and thus become more resilient. By framing these fears as universal conditions, the counselor aims to create a non-judgmental space for kids to discuss their experiences and demonstrate courage in the face of adversity. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/28990108

23. Helping Kids Reason 12/13/2023

23. Helping Kids Reason This podcast episode builds off of the concept of four different types of reasoning simultaneously performed by distinct parts of the brain. The inner Artist engages in Emotional-Reasoning, associating experiences with emotions. The inner Scout employs Magical-Reasoning, finding patterns and correlations to make sense of the world. The inner Warrior relies on Logical-Reasoning, basing actions on evidence and logic. The inner Chief, responsible for regulating the brain, uses Influencer-Reasoning, considering factors like relationships, authority, power, charisma, expertise, and fame. Despite the common perception of Logical-Reasoning's superiority, it’s Emotional-Reasoning that often determines choices after weighing the different types of reasoning. The skilled residential counselor can help child-clients become more skilled at each of the four types of reasoning, and at blending the four types together to arrive at a richer understanding of how the world works. Emotional-Reasoning can be improved by assisting clients with Affect-Labeling, which involves clients using words to describe their emotions, contributing to a calming effect on the brain. Other tools, such as Feelings Maps, Feelings Word Banks, and the Feelings Thermometer can help clients with Affect-Labeling. Residential Counselors can nurture Magical-Reasoning in children, especially those on the autism spectrum, through copying games and pretend play. Magical-Reasoning is often times the basis of social principles and friendships. Logical-Reasoning can be helped along by teaching the use of pro-con lists, the scientific method, and activities that exercise executive functions such as planning, prioritizing, organizing, working memory, and flexibility. Influencer-Reasoning is addressed through positive role modeling and awareness of peer influence. The episode concludes by highlighting the importance of cognitive flexibility and practicing all four reasoning types for the developmental growth of children. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/28990043

22. Understanding Reasoning 12/06/2023

22. Understanding Reasoning This podcast presents a way to understand the brain’s ability to use reasoning to become cognitively centered. Emotional centering involves regulating the intensity and switching between emotional states. Behavioral centering, particularly physiological centering, focuses on transitioning from extremes to a calm baseline. It’s a little harder to understand the concept of becoming cognitively centered, but a good place to start is with a look at how the brain employs reasoning. A traditional dictionary definition of reasoning states that it has to be logical in nature. However, reasoning is better understood as a broader action of figuring out reasons why the world is the way it is. Early in life, before the parts of your brain that are capable of logical reasoning have sufficiently developed, parts of your brain understand the world in terms of emotions. The Artist parts of your brain process sensory information as feelings and find patterns and associations between your experiences and your feelings. Your feelings and your Emotional-Reasoning evolve as you mature, accommodating more nuanced and contradictory feelings. Emotional-Reasoning doesn’t go away as your mature. It’s the only kind of reasoning that some sections of your brain are capable of doing. Other parts of your brain, the more cognitively sophisticated parts I call The Scout, develop the ability to do Magical-Reasoning. This develops out of experiencing correlations and connections between people, objects, and places, often based on imitation and symbolism. Magical-Reasoning also persists into adulthood, coexisting with Logical-Reasoning. Magical-Reasoning becomes the basis for much of how you make sense of social situations and social rules. As your frontal cortex develops, Logical-Reasoning becomes better at moving beyond correlation and predicting cause and effect. Logical-Reasoning takes more energy. It doesn’t take the place of Emotional- and Magical-Reasoning; instead it exists simultaneously in different parts of your brain. The Chief parts of your brain, that specialize in regulating the rest of your brain and body, use yet a fourth type of reasoning that I call Influencer-Reasoning. This type of reasoning guides you in who to copy and follow. There’s six sources of influence: Relationship, Authority, Power-Broker, Charismatic, Expert, and Fame influences. By blending the four types of reasoning, you’ll become more centered. You can also help your child-clients to become more skilled at using each of the four types of reasoning. That’s the focus of the next episode. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/28807983

21. Becoming Physiologically Centered 11/29/2023

21. Becoming Physiologically Centered This episode focuses on how to help child-clients become physiologically centered. Previous episodes have focused on helping children become emotionally and cognitively centered. Emotional centering involves regulating extremes of emotions, and developing reaction inhibition and stress tolerance. Various tools, such as the Check-in and Empathic Listening can be really useful for helping kids become emotionally centered. Cognitive centering techniques include the use of tools like the Feelings Thermometer and Feelings Maps to help kids describe their feelings. A complimentary approach focuses on leveraging clients’ physiology to help them become centered. Afterall, every emotion is expressed in various ways throughout a person’s body. Co-regulation, achieved through shared activities and physical engagement, is a basic way in which a counselor can help a client become centered on a physiological level. Changing a child's physiology is a powerful way to influence regulate their emotions and thoughts. Techniques such as sitting down, drinking water, engaging in physical activities, and going on walks are explored. Food also powerfully impacts physiology but in many ways it’s too powerful and overusing it as a way to change a kids mood or attitude can cause unwanted negative consequences. Likewise, touch, hugs, and hand-holding can be very physiological centering, but again there’s a need for judgment and clear program guidelines. Various techniques, including sensory meditation, breathing exercises, and mindfulness, are recommended to help children become physiologically centered. The challenges of implementing these techniques are explored, including the need for months of daily practice and potential boredom of some exercises. This episode concludes by introducing the Owl Eyes technique, a form of sensory walking meditation involving maintaining peripheral vision. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/28805813

20. Stories - The Bear Clan Origin pt. 1-3 11/22/2023

20. Stories - The Bear Clan Origin pt. 1-3 This episode is a departure from the usual format by sharing original teaching stories. Storytelling and stories are a fundamental modality for learning. Our brains are wired to process experiences in the form of a narrative. Telling stories builds connections between adults and children, whether the adult is the storyteller or the child. Telling stories, or listening to stories together, fosters a sense of shared experience and strengthens the therapeutic alliance. Stories engage various parts of the brain, both verbal and nonverbal, conscious and unconscious, effecting every part of the psyche. Several Bear Clan stories illustrate coping skills, teach relaxation techniques, address problem-solving, and explore character development. Some stories aim to facilitate discussions about traumatic issues, acknowledging the challenge many children face in expressing emotions associated with negative events. A central theme in the Bear Clan stories revolves around courage and the importance of finding balance for transformation. The values portrayed in this episode’s stories draw from Native American teachings, specifically The Seven Gifts of the Grandfathers. The episode introduces the Bear Clan Origin Story arc, drawing inspiration from a traditional Native American story called "The Boy Who Lived With the Bears." The narrative involves a child being adopted by bears after being mistreated by an uncle, emphasizing the importance of treating children with respect and love. This episode shares the first three parts of the Bear Clan Origin Story. It is built around the Native American parable of two wolves existing within every person. In the Bear Clan version these wolves are “good” and “bad” but rather "courageous" and "fearsome." Overall, the episode highlights the therapeutic benefits of storytelling in connecting with clients, addressing trauma, and imparting valuable life lessons. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/28701933

19. Management and Delegating 11/15/2023

19. Management and Delegating This podcast episode discusses the importance of management and delegation within residential treatment programs for children and youth. It highlights the different levels of management within such organizations, including Executive Management responsible for overall leadership, Senior Management overseeing major aspects of the agency's operations, Middle Managers handling specific service units, and Frontline Managers leading shifts. It emphasizes that effective management is essential to provide quality care to the clients. The episode explores various roles within residential programs, such as coordinators responsible for specific tasks like organizing activities or managing facility supplies. It also delves into the role of Key Staff, who work directly with clients, helping with activities of daily living, treatment programming, and more. Delegation is a central theme in the podcast, and it stresses the importance of role clarity, administrative infrastructure, and a strong process for successful delegation and for program development. A five-step model for a delegation process is explained, involving (1) task explanation, including clarification of deliverables, (2) checking the person’s understanding of the delegated task or project, (3) reviewing what resources the person can use to achieve the task or project, (4) collaboratively establish a deadline and understanding around asking for an extension if needed, and (5) feedback afterwards on how the project or task delegation went. The episode underscores the need for management to empower staff by clearly defining roles and responsibilities and creating a shared vision for the organization. It also touches on different sources of influences beyond the Authority-Influence that comes from having any particular position within the organization. Additional sources of influence, and power to achieve one’s responsibilities, include Relationship-Influence, Power Broker-Influence, Charismatic-Influence, Expert-Influence, and Fame-Influence. Ultimately, this podcast provides insights into the challenges and best practices of managing residential treatment programs, with an emphasis on effective delegation as a key tool for success. It encourages a collaborative and organized approach to improve the quality of care and empower staff at all levels of management. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/28514909

18. Processing Suicidal Ideation 11/08/2023

18. Processing Suicidal Ideation This podcast episode is the second part of a series that addresses how to intervene when dealing with suicidal ideation in children and youth. It emphasizes the importance of training for counselors and aims to make discussing this sensitive subject more approachable. An important focus is for counselors is to help clients understand suicidal ideation as a symptom rather than delving into the "why" behind it, which is a task for therapists. The episode emphasizes the need to distance clients from these thoughts and work on developing their executive skills, especially stress tolerance. The counselor's role involves empathetic listening, establishing a sense of belonging, and helping the client tolerate their negative feelings and thoughts without using harmful behaviors. If suicidal ideation includes gestures, attempts, or plans, the counselor should assess the situation in terms of risk and rescue factors and consult with an on-call clinician. After a check-in around suicidal ideation, there are important communications and documentation to the rest of the team. There may also be structural interventions put in place such as Scheduled Check-Ins, Increased Structure, Staff Shadowing, Re-entry Plans, and various restrictions that can be documented on a Safety Watch form. That documentation helps everyone on the immediate team, and involved in follow up the next day, to work as a team to help keep the client feeling and acting safe. Another powerful intervention is the creation of a Safety Contract, which serves as a formal agreement between the at-risk client and staff to ensure safety and offers personalized support. The episode also underscores the partnership between therapy and counseling, with therapy addressing the "why" and counseling addressing the "how" of maladaptive behaviors. Lastly, the podcast reminds listeners of the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (988) as a resource for those needing guidance and emotional support outside of their work lives. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/28465712

17. Suicidal Ideation 11/01/2023

16. The Aspect Compass & Meeting Kids' Needs 10/25/2023

16. The Aspect Compass & Meeting Kids' Needs This podcast presents a powerful perspective for helping your child-clients become centered. It’s based on understanding your kids’ needs through The Aspect Compass, a model representing four aspects of the psyche: The Artist (emotions), The Scout (cognitions), The Warrior (behaviors), and The Chief (executive skills). Each aspect has unique needs that, when addressed, can help children become centered and balanced: For the inner Artist: Getting sufficient attention. Experiencing a full range of feelings. Achieving emotional stability. Expressing feelings. Facing fears. Grieving. Attention and validation are essential for children's emotional well-being. Offering appropriate outlets for expressing emotions through words or art is encouraged. Support in facing fears and containing grief, while directing processing of grief to a therapist, are all important ways residentials staff support The Artist feeling centered. For the inner Scout: Developing awareness. Observing skills. Acquiring knowledge. Navigating effectively. Reporting skills. Engaging in activities that focus on sensory perception and cognitive exploration helps children become cognitively centered. Physically exploring and navigating an environment will help kids experience behaving like a scout. Encouraging accurate reporting will develop their abilities to be an effective scout, and will help their inner Scout feel centered. For the inner Warrior: Having a mission and plan. Feeling a sense of agency, achievement, and accomplishment. Sense that one’s behaviors are meaningful. Meeting basic physical and psychological safety needs. Maintaining physical health. Relaxation. Helping children establish goals, fostering a sense of agency, and recognizing their achievements are essential for their behavioral well-being. Ensuring physical safety, health, and relaxation are also key components of centering the inner Warrior. Structured time for relaxing is an important part of helping the inner Warrior feel centered. For the inner Chief: Enhancing self-awareness. Maintaining integrity. Cultivating wisdom. Fostering a state of appreciation. Building a sense of tribe/community. Encouraging service to others. The Chief plays a crucial role in coordinating the other aspects and needs self-awareness, integrity, and wisdom. Developing a sense of appreciation, belonging to a community, and engaging in service to others are vital for the Chief to feel centered. This podcast emphasizes that understanding and addressing these needs can help residential staff design therapeutic programs and create environments that promote positive learning and growth for child clients, ultimately helping them become emotionally, cognitively, behaviorally, and physiologically centered while fostering a sense of community and belonging. /episode/index/show/c840cee2-15ca-4efe-b975-53735a7aace0/id/28326824

Becoming Centered

TOPICS