Brilliantly Resilient

What's your train wreck? Everyone has one–past, present, or future. But why do some people come through stronger while others never recover? Hang on for the ride as Mary Fran teaches you to move beyond crisis to discover your Brilliance and Resilience. You'll face challenges with strategies to come through brilliant, not broken, for personal and professional fulfillment and success!

Episode 233: The Art of Rising: Finding Resilience Through Creativity with Pia Maillot-Leichter 11/10/2025

Episode 233: The Art of Rising: Finding Resilience Through Creativity with Pia Maillot-Leichter “You have to give yourself permission to suck — that’s how we grow and develop. Resilience is built in the messy middle.” ~ Pia Maillot-Leichter, Founder of The Kolektive Studio and Author of Welcome to the Creative Club Pia Maillot-Leichter, founder of The Kollektive Studio and author of , joins the Brilliantly Resilient Podcast to explore how creativity is one of the most powerful tools for resilience and self-discovery. Pia reminds us that creativity isn’t reserved for artists — it’s a life skill. Whether you’re building a business, solving a problem, or reimagining your next chapter, creativity allows us to reset our thinking, rise from challenges, and reveal the brilliance that’s already within us. Through her stories and insights, Pia shows how creativity thrives through connection — with others, with ideas, and with life itself. She challenges us to let go of perfection, embrace play, and give ourselves permission to create — not because it’s perfect, but because it’s possible. In that permission lies true resilience, as we grow, evolve, and experience resilience through those changes. By rediscovering our creative spirits, we reset, allowing new ideas, processes and paths to emerge. As we open our creativity to collaboration, we rise, allowing for imperfections along the way. And brilliance shines through as we dare to design the next scene of life on our own terms. As Pia says, “You’re the creative director of your own story — and it’s time to call, ‘Action!’” Learn more about , and tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast for more of Pia's wisdom. Be sure to listen in for these additional bits of Brilliance: “Creativity is a practice — we have to keep showing up and reminding ourselves to play. It’s just as important as ticking something off a to-do list.” “When we’re able to imagine, dream, and create space for play, we can shape a very different reality — for ourselves and for others.” “In a time of destruction, creativity and creatives are needed more than ever. We all have that innate creativity — it’s time to reclaim it.” “You have to give yourself permission to suck — that’s how we grow and develop. Resilience is built in the messy middle.” “Logic and magic work together. Creativity isn’t separate from structure — it’s the partnership between both that lets ideas thrive.” “Creativity is how we find novel and delightful ways of solving everyday challenges. It’s how we’ve always survived — it’s part of being human.” “There’s no such thing as a lone creative genius. Everything is co-created — with people, ideas, and even life itself.” “The best way to become resilient is to do it — to keep creating, sharing, and learning through the process.” “Be the creative director of your life. You get to choose the next scene and how you want it to look.” Thank you, PIa, for sharing the joy of creativity! Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/38943820

Episode 232: Turning Resilience into Action: Introducing the Brilliantly Resilient Mini-Course Series 11/01/2025

Episode 232: Turning Resilience into Action: Introducing the Brilliantly Resilient Mini-Course Series “These courses are a roadmap — they guide you to not only uncover your resilience but to rise, thrive, and ultimately find your brilliance within life’s challenges.” ~ Mary Fran Bontempo, Creator of the Today it's me--sharing the story behind the creation of the Brilliantly Resilient Mini-Course Series — Reset with Resilience, Rise and Thrive, and Reveal Your Brilliance. After years of helping people bounce back from life’s challenges through her books, speaking, and podcast, I wanted to create a hands-on way for anyone to learn and live the Brilliantly Resilient process at their own pace. Through short, powerful video lessons and guided workbooks, these mini-courses will take learners from simply surviving to thriving — one intentional step at a time. Reset with Resilience helps you uncover your core values and reclaim control over what truly matters. Rise and Thrive guides you to identify transferable strengths, build supportive tribes, and take imperfect action toward progress. And finally, Reveal Your Brilliance leads you to discover your unique gifts and let go of rigid outcomes so your brilliance can shine in every area of life. These courses were born from a desire to make resilience doable. Whether you’re facing a major life shift or simply ready to grow, this series offers practical, heartfelt guidance for anyone ready to reset, rise, and reveal their brilliance — one brilliantly imperfect step at a time. Tune into this podcast to learn more, and access the courses through this link: . Be sure to use Promo Code EARLY BIRD for big discounts! “Nobody really tells us how to become resilient. Well, that’s what I’ve been able to do with the Brilliantly Resilient process and the new mini-course series.” “Reset with Resilience teaches you quite literally how to tap into your inherent resilience through your value system, your perception of challenges, and controlling your controllables.” “These courses are a roadmap — they guide you to not only uncover your resilience but to rise, thrive, and ultimately find your brilliance within life’s challenges.” “The good news about these courses is not only do they teach you to find your resilience, but how to rise and thrive beyond the initial crisis and continue to move forward.” “When we lead with our hearts, the best of us comes through — we can discover our brilliance through service.” “The places where we think we’re going to find our brilliance aren’t always where we end up — and yet, there’s always brilliance to share wherever we land.” “I really believe these courses are the perfect way to help individuals and organizations reset, rise, and reveal their brilliance — in the easiest, most personal way possible.” I know these mini-courses will be a great tool to help you live a Brilliantly Resilient life. Let's learn to be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/38873625

Episode 231: Building Resilience One Move at a Time with Jake Weiner of Zooz Fitness 10/27/2025

Episode 231: Building Resilience One Move at a Time with Jake Weiner of Zooz Fitness “Sometimes resilience looks like showing up. That’s it. Just being here, trying again, and refusing to give up.” ~ Jake Weiner--Founder, Everyone knows that exercise and movement are important to health, both mental and physical. But can exercise help build strength in other ways--like resilience? Jake Weiner thinks so. Jake is the founder of Zooz Fitness, an inclusive fitness community in Los Angeles dedicated to making health and movement accessible to individuals of all abilities. Jake has witnessed the transformative power of movement, and shares how resilience, inclusivity, and empowerment drive his mission to make movement accessible to all. Zooz is more than a fitness space — it’s a community where individuals of all abilities discover confidence and capability through movement. Jake’s belief that “movement is a universal language” allows him to reach individuals regardless of ability or self-perception to help them reframe limits and redefine what’s possible. Jake’s approach exemplifies taking intentional, often imperfect action and building community. He helps clients focus on what they can do, building small victories into major transformations. Jake's work demonstrates that resilience is often rooted in consistency, compassion, and community — not in perfection. Each session at Zooz reinforces the idea that progress is personal, and every step forward is worth celebrating. Jake’s leadership helps others see their innate strength and potential--even when they can't see it themselves. By creating an inclusive environment that celebrates diversity in ability and experience, he helps people reveal their brilliance through movement, self-belief, and connection. Jake's story reminds us that true brilliance is not about doing more — it’s about being more, right where you are. For more of Jake's wisdom, and to learn from Zooz Fitness member (and awesome lady!) Mary Bella, . Learn more about , and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: “Movement is a universal language — everyone deserves the chance to experience what their body can do.” “At Zooz, we don’t focus on what people can’t do. We start with what they can — and we build from there.” “When someone walks through our doors, it’s not about perfection or performance. It’s about participation.” “We all have barriers, but when you move beyond them — physically or mentally — that’s where growth happens.” “Inclusivity isn’t just about access. It’s about creating a space where everyone feels seen, capable, and celebrated.” “Sometimes resilience looks like showing up. That’s it. Just being here, trying again, and refusing to give up.” “The biggest transformation I see isn’t in muscle or strength. It’s in confidence.” “Everyone has their own version of brilliance. At Zooz, our job is to help people uncover it through movement.” “Zooz isn’t just a gym — it’s a community of people redefining what strength and success look like.” Thank you, Jake (and former guest Allison Norlian--) for caring and doing what you do! Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/38801490

Episode 230: How to Build Resilience By Questioning the Status Quo, with Victoria Lenormand 10/17/2025

Episode 230: How to Build Resilience By Questioning the Status Quo, with Victoria Lenormand “I realized I was battling in a system that valued the system over the child — and that was a big wake-up call.” ~Victoria Lenormand, Former Police Detective, Founder of Gemini Directions and Author of Have you ever felt like you just didn't fit in? Occasionally, and especially during the teenage years, everyone feels like they don't belong. But how would you manage feeling like that every day? And if you were a parent watching your child struggling with such feelings, how would you help them (and you) through it? Victoria Lenormand is a former police detective from the U.K. who has used her acute skill set to help her autistic son navigate a world where he doesn't always "fit" within the systems society has in place. Victoria's journey from investigation to advocacy revealed the cracks in systems designed to serve but not always to see the individuals they are meant to help. Once her son was diagnosed with autism, Victoria found herself confronting institutions that valued rules and systems over people. That moment became a call to tap into resilience with courage as she began to ask questions and challenge the status quo with compassion and clarity. Recognizing an ever evolving diverse population within her community, Victoria pushed for growth and change through flexiblity, observation and adaptation. Further, she openly advocated modeling mistakes for children and embracing imperfection, thus empowering parents, educators, and leaders to take small, intentional steps toward changing systems to better serve communities. Victoria reminds us that "we're better when we're together," offering everyone the chance to shine their own brilliant light through differences to build vibrant communities. Her book, The Magic of Not Fitting In, invites us to celebrate diversity as a source of strength. By shifting focus from fixing those who are different to understanding, adapting and learning, she shows how true brilliance is revealed not in conformity, but in compassion, curiosity, connection and the willingness to institute change. Learn more about Victoria and tune in for more of her wisdom on this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: “I realized I was battling in a system that valued the system over the child — and that was a big wake-up call.” “Our children don’t fit the narrative, so we have to create another narrative.” “When the community shows itself to be diverse, the system can’t respond if it remains the way it is.” “If a child is in trauma in that environment, it’s not for us to critique their resilience — it’s for us to meet the need.” “Resilience...is the ability to flex, to step back, and to ask better questions.” “We don’t develop resilience from the comfort place — we develop it through the rough stuff.” “Let me model mistakes for you. Learn to laugh at yourself. You don’t have to measure everything as a pass or fail.” “Maybe if we focus first on helping children discover who they are — and make that okay — we’ll start to see real growth.” “We’re better when we’re together. Diversity should be echoed in our systems, not othered by them.” Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/38623200

Episode 229: How to Make Leadership a Habit, with Habituelle Founder, Jessi Sheridan 10/06/2025

Episode 229: How to Make Leadership a Habit, with Habituelle Founder, Jessi Sheridan “Habituelle is rooted in the belief that leadership isn’t a title—it’s how we show up, again and again.” ~ Jessi Sheridan, Founder of Habituelle When you think of habits, what comes to mind? Often, when we think of a habit, it's in a critical way--as in a bad habit we want to break. But Habituelle founder Jessi Sheridan believes that making something a habit is a positive way to create powerful, lasting change. In this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, Jessi Sheridan shares how her approach to leadership grew from the belief that leadership is a habit--one that can be cultivated with small, intentional practices that reflect who women truly are—rather than conforming to systems designed by someone else. To begin her practice, Jessi asks the question, “What is the impact I want to have?” which serves as a daily reset for leaders seeking purpose and alignment in both their personal and professional lives. Jessi's approach also aligns with the Brilliantly Resilient practice of taking imperfect action while not being married to outcomes. She didn’t start with a fully formed plan; instead, she moved forward with curiosity, reflection, and imperfect action. Much like resilience itself, Jessi's path evolved step by step, grounded in consistent habits and guided by values. Her reminder that women are often “climbing a ladder built by and for someone else” challenges us to redefine success and build our own structure for growth. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know the power of imperfect action, especially when it aligns with our values. By staying grounded in values, we are able to, in Jessi's words, "take up more space” releasing perfectionism and embracing the art of being present. In this way, we design our own habits of leadership, providing a personal path for growth. Learn more about , and listen to for more of Jessi's wisdom. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of Billiance: “Leadership is a habit—something we practice daily through small, intentional choices.” “I always ask myself, ‘What is the impact I want to have?’ That question keeps me grounded and focused.” “So many women find themselves climbing a ladder that was built by and for someone else.” “We need to take up more space—not just physically, but in our voices, our ideas, and the way we lead.” “Habituelle is rooted in the belief that leadership isn’t a title—it’s how we show up, again and again.” “I didn’t come to this work with a fully formed plan. It evolved slowly, with each imperfect step.” “Perfection isn’t the goal—consistency is. Leadership and growth happen through repetition and reflection.” “Resilience isn’t about avoiding failure—it’s about learning, adjusting, and trying again with intention.” “When we lead from authenticity instead of expectation, we make space for brilliance to emerge naturally.” Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/38473795

Episode 228: Resilience Beyond the Expected: Harnessing Neurodivergent Brilliance with Rita Ramakrishnan 09/26/2025

Episode 228: Resilience Beyond the Expected: Harnessing Neurodivergent Brilliance with Rita Ramakrishnan "We have to reshape how we talk about neurodivergence in the workplace--shift from it being a disability that needs to be accomodated to a form of cognitive diversity we can cultivate and harness to drive success." Rita Ramakrishnan ~ Founder and CEO of What if the very things you’ve seen as challenges are actually your greatest strengths? Rita Ramakrishnan was diagnosed as neurodivergent and autistic as a young adult, but she always knew she was different. Getting her diagnosis proved to be the proverbial light bulb, explaining much of what made Rita wonder about how she functioned in the world. But labels like neurodivergence and autism can be scary--at least at first. The idea of a brain that operates differently can be difficult to understand by those who are neurodivergent as well as others, who may see different as a liability, especially in the workplace. As founder of Iksana Consulting, Rita works with neurodivergent leaders as well as corporations and shares her powerful perspective that neurodivergence is not a flaw but a different operating system—one that often brings extraordinary gifts like creativity, rapid problem-solving, and unique pattern recognition. She reminds us that resilience isn’t about bouncing back, but about “bouncing forward” by experimenting, adapting, and embracing flexibility--a message relevant to us all. (In Sanskrit, "Iksana" means thoughtful observation, including a mindful and attentive presence to truly see and understand the needs and potential of a person or situation.) Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know that Brilliance and Resilience come in all shapes and sizes--and there's room for everyone. Rita reminds us that brilliance doesn’t come from sameness—it comes from authenticity, diversity, and the courage to rise in your own way. As we recognize differences and treat them with openness and respect, we become open to sharing the knowledge and wisdom of others, expanding our tribes, and our power to solve problems and build a better world, opening the door to grace and possibility rather than shame. Find out more about Rita's important work at , and tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Rita's wisdom. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: “For a lot of neurodivergent folks, you spend a lot of your life feeling like a square peg in a round hole… and getting a diagnosis or some understanding is really helpful to put that into context.” “I like to think of most neurodivergence as an operating system that processes inputs differently, and therefore the outputs look different too.” "I want us to stop labeling these things as different. Let's have a holistic view about how you process information." “Resilience for a neurodivergent person isn’t just about bouncing back—it’s about bouncing forward.” “To me, the resilient aspect of neurodivergence is acknowledging that you’re not broken. We are brilliant in our own respect. I love my brain.” “My clients have gifts that are going to be transformative for their organizations… this isn’t something to be tolerated, it’s something to be harnessed.” “Neurodivergent brains often see patterns much faster, process information more quickly, and generate creative alternative solutions.” “Half the time, all people want is to be understood… simply saying, ‘Tell me more,’ creates room for brilliance to emerge.” “The best definition of happiness I’ve seen is the intersection of peacefulness and productivity. Imagine if workplaces valued both equally.” Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran P.S. I just LOVED this episode! Thank you, Rita!!! /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/38374415

Episode 227: How Conflict Offers Opportunities to Build Resilience and Growth, with Ursula Taylor 09/14/2025

Episode 227: How Conflict Offers Opportunities to Build Resilience and Growth, with Ursula Taylor “Every disagreement is an invitation to pause, reflect, and reset before we respond.” Ursula Taylor ~ Founder, The legal profession is basically founded on conflict. One side tries to prove the other wrong in order to "win." A former commercial litigator with 17 years of experience, Ursula Taylor has seen her share of conflict, and she's committed to changing the idea of conflict as a battle to be won into an opportunity to clarify values, adjust perspective and focus on solutions instead of blame. By working with corporations and individuals through Conflict Reimagined, Ursula helps resolve conflicts with holistic strategies not found within traditional dispute resolution. In this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, Ursula Taylor invites us to reframe the way we view conflict, redefining it as an opportunity uncover what truly matters. Conflict, when met with resilience, then becomes a tool for clarity rather than battle and chaos. When we focus less on blame and more on solutions, we can lean into our strengths, involving our supportive tribe, and taking even small, imperfect steps toward understanding other points of view. We can turn disagreements into pathways for growth where conflict becomes less about winning and losing, and more about building momentum, connection, and deeper resilience. Echoing the Brilliliantly Resilient method, Ursula urges us to release outcomes and expectations while we lead with heart, allowing space for unexpected solutions and stronger relationships. She notes that conflict doesn’t just shape outcomes—it shapes us. By embracing that truth, we don’t just survive difficult conversations, we rise stronger and shine brighter. Learn more about Ursula at For more of Ursula's wisdom, tune into and be sure listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: “Conflict doesn’t have to be destructive; it can be the spark that helps us see what really matters.” “When we reset our perspective, we begin to see conflict not as chaos, but as a chance to clarify values.” “Every disagreement is an invitation to pause, reflect, and reset before we respond.” “Rising through conflict means focusing on solutions, not blame—and leaning into the strengths we bring to the table.” “We build resilience in conflict when we take imperfect steps toward understanding instead of waiting for the perfect answer.” “When you involve your tribe in resolution, you find support, perspective, and the courage to keep going.” “The brilliance in conflict is revealed when we allow it to shape us—teaching flexibility, empathy, and new ways forward.” “Letting go of rigid outcomes in conflict opens space for unexpected, brilliant solutions to emerge.” “Conflict handled with heart and purpose doesn’t just solve problems—it strengthens relationships and resilience.” Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/38216085

Episode 226: The Power of Sharing Your Story, with Sara Connell 09/03/2025

Episode 226: The Power of Sharing Your Story, with Sara Connell “The very thing you’re afraid to say is often what will inspire someone else to keep going.” ~ Sara Connell, Best-selling Author and Founder of Thought Leader Academy Have you ever thought about writing a book but believe you have nothing to say? For those of us living "ordinary" lives, it's easy to feel our stories have little meaning beyond our own lives. Yet Sara Connell holds the opposite to be true. As founder of the Thought Leader Academy and a 5x Bestselling author, Sara knows that even everyday stories can have profound impact. In fact, the experiences that test us but which we often overlook as meaningless to others can be the very ones that inspire people to uncover their own resilience and reclaim their power. Sharing our stories enables us to give voice to our own truth, find meaning, and heal as we rise from challenges. Each time we share our journey--the messy parts--the vulnerable parts, we strengthen our own resilience and provide a roadmap for someone else to rise. Ultimately, Sara notes that Brilliance is not about a perfect story, but about sharing authenticity. Our stories, no matter their scope, hold the potential to heal, connect, and inspire, becoming catalysts for resilience, transformation, and brilliance that ripple outward into the world. where she helps coaches, experts and entrepreneurs scale impact + create 6-7 figures by becoming bestselling authors and in demand/TEDx speakers. Tune in for more of her wisdom on this week's and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance and check out Sara's FREE GIFTS BELOW: “Stories are the bridges that connect us—we heal ourselves and others every time we tell them.” “You don’t need a blockbuster story to make an impact. Your everyday story can be the light someone else needs.” “When we give voice to our story, we reclaim our power.” “Your story isn’t what happened to you—it’s the meaning you choose to create from it.” “Stories are proof that we survived, and they become roadmaps for others to rise too.” “The very thing you’re afraid to say is often what will inspire someone else to keep going.” “Sharing your story doesn’t just free you—it gives others permission to share theirs.” "Every time you tell your story, you expand the possibility of what’s available—for yourself and for others.” “Brilliance isn’t about perfection—it’s about showing up in your truth, story and all.” Check out these FREE GIFTS from Sara! 7 Steps to Write a Revenue Generating Bestselling Book (in as little as 2 months even if you’ve never written before) PLUS: Sara’s bonus templates and worksheets that have generated hundreds of bestsellers: 6-Step Pitch Power Training: In this training, Sara shows you her 6-Step Pitch- which has resulted in thousands of podcasts, conferences, virtual events, and media appearances: Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/38078440

Episode 225: How to Reset When Achievement Feels Empty, with Dr. Toni Warner 08/19/2025

Episode 225: How to Reset When Achievement Feels Empty, with Dr. Toni Warner “We get addicted to achievement because it’s how we prove we matter.” ~ Dr. Toni Warner, Certified Trauma Therapist and Author of Achievement. Do more. Be more. Check off more boxes. UGH. Most women feel the need to achieve, which is not a bad thing in itself. But when that need keeps us spinning, working, accomplishing, but still feeling drained, and unfulfilled, somethin' ain't working. Dr. Toni Warner’s has walked the walk, achieving by all of society's standards but feeling something missing. Her work centers on redefining success for high-achieving women as she lifts the veil on what it feels like to “do all the things” and still feel unfulfilled—a reality that resonates deeply with many listeners who wear their productivity as proof of worth. Her story of outward success masking an inward mess is the starting point for a Reset—a call to pause, check in, and create space to feel, not just function. With a clear yet compassionate voice, Dr. Toni invites women to Rise not by doing more, but by being more present. She challenges the myth that ambition must come with constant burnout and shows how tiny, intentional practices—like asking how you want to be today—can shift the trajectory of your day and life. Through the use of simple tools like her “intentional scheduler,” she offers a framework for integrating flow into structure, showing that ambition and alignment are not mutually exclusive. Ultimately, her message is an invitation to Reveal Your Brilliance by letting go of rigid identities and reconnecting to core values. Whether you're a mother, a leader, a healer—or all three—Dr. Warner reminds us that fulfillment is not found in a title or to-do list, but in how we show up for ourselves and others. Her wisdom isn’t just motivational—it’s actionable and deeply needed for a generation of women ready to thrive without sacrificing themselves in the process. At times, the best way we can navigate our Reset, Rise and Reveal of our Brilliance is by doing less, and being highly intentional about what we choose to do--keeping an ear tuned to how we feel and what we truly want. Find Dr. Warner's book , and download her free Intentional Scheduler Template- and be sure to check out her upcoming RESET Group Experience for professional women navigating parenting, intimate partnership and purpose as they seek continued success growth: , starting in September. Tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast for more of Dr. Warner's wisdom and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: “Outward success, inward mess—that was my reality.” "I looked strong, but I didn’t always feel strong. That disconnect wore me down.” “When you’ve done all the things and still don’t feel fulfilled—that’s your signal to reset.” “You cannot live for only action. It completely takes away from who we are.” “We get addicted to achievement because it’s how we prove we matter.” “Start small. And acknowledge that small is enough.” “Your core values aren’t just what you love—they’re how you want to be.” “Structure allows for flow, not rigidity.” “Burnout doesn’t always look like collapse. Sometimes it’s completing every task and still feeling empty.” “Grace creates space for adaptation, which is the heart of resilience.” Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/37856615

Episode 224: How to "Graduate" into a Joyful, Fulfilling Retirement, with Author and Retirement Expert Elizabeth Zelinka Parsons 08/13/2025

Episode 224: How to "Graduate" into a Joyful, Fulfilling Retirement, with Author and Retirement Expert Elizabeth Zelinka Parsons “The happiest people in retirement are the ones who stay curious.” Elizabeth Zelinka Parsons ~ Retirement Transition Expert, Former Attorney and Author of When you began your work life, do you remember thinking about retirement? For many decades, retirement was the 65-year-old's goal: the end of the "job" and the entry into leisure and relaxation until...um...the end??? Too often, though, the relaxation didn't materialize--at least not in the way it was intended, especially for those who not only enjoyed working, but whose work life seemed to define them. Too many retirements seemed less than satisfying, maybe downright boring. Elizabeth Zelinka Parsons challenges the traditional narrative of retirement. Using a Brilliantly Resilient mindset and adjusting perspective, Elizabeth advises viewing retirement as a "graduation" instead of a final chapter. She reframes retirement as a vibrant reset—a time to step into freedom, creativity, and self-defined purpose. With warmth and humor, she reminds us that “nobody really wants 365 Saturdays,” because lasting fulfillment comes from living with intention, not just endless leisure. By encouraging curosity, Elizabeth offers those in retirement the opportunity to explore passions they may have set aside during their working years, and see retirement as a season for growth rather than retreat. Whether that growth comes from volunteering, traveling, starting a new venture, or learning a skill just for fun, she proves that energy and excitement aren’t bound by age or career stage. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know that our Brilliance is always available to us. As Elizabeth notes, it doesn't "retire when we do." Our knowledge, experiences and passions can be transferred into this life phase, creating excitement and repurposing our lives with possibilty, resilience and joy. Get your copy of here, and tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Elizabeth's wisdom. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance (note the relationship of the quotes to the Brilliantly Resilient method): Retirement isn’t the end of your story—it’s the start of a whole new chapter you get to write.” Reset: See it as a fresh beginning, not a closing door. “If you wait for life to slow down before you start living, you’ll wait forever.” Rise: Take action toward the life you want now. “The goal isn’t to stop working—it’s to start living with more freedom and joy.” Reveal: Redefine what work and purpose mean to you. “Your identity isn’t your job title. Who you are goes far deeper.” Reset: Separate self-worth from professional labels. “You can bring your brilliance into retirement—it doesn’t retire with you.” Rise: Use your skills and wisdom in new, meaningful ways. “The happiest people in retirement are the ones who stay curious.” Reveal: Curiosity keeps you engaged, joyful, and resilient. “It’s not about filling your time, it’s about fulfilling your soul.” Reset: Align your days with your core values. “Retirement is your opportunity to finally create without constraint.” Rise: Give yourself permission to explore bold new ideas. “Every transition is an invitation to grow—even the ones we think should be all rest and relaxation.” Reveal: Brilliance evolves through every life stage. “Nobody really wants 365 Saturdays in a row.” Reset: True happiness blends leisure with purpose. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/37765515

Episode 223: I Went Back to Therapy, And Here's Why--with Mary Fran Bontempo 08/04/2025

Episode 223: I Went Back to Therapy, And Here's Why--with Mary Fran Bontempo “Please don’t assume you’ll just talk yourself out of dark places. Help is there—and there’s a reason for it.” ~ Mary Fran Bontempo: Brilliantly Resilient podcast host and author of "" This week on the Brilliantly Resilient Podcast, I’m getting personal. I recorded a solo episode about something we all face—but rarely talk about: knowing when it’s time to ask for help. Lately, I’ve felt overwhelmed, anxious, and just plain out of juice. So I did something both difficult and powerful—I went back to therapy. In this episode, I talk about how I knew it was time, why vulnerability doesn’t make us weak, and how admitting you’re not okay is actually one of the most resilient things you can do. Living a Brilliantly Resilient life is a process--one that I repeat over and over. No one becomes Brilliantly Resilient and stays there; life's challenges don't allow it. Putting up your hand to ask for help, along with building your tribe of support, are two of the most important pillars of the Brilliantly Resilient process. But when we're in a good place and breezing along, asking for help and support are rarely uppermost in anyone's mind. Further, asking for help makes us feel vulernable, and I'd rather run a marathon than feel vulnerable. (P.S. I hate running.) But when the cost is too high, as when anxiety takes hold, it's essential to embrace humility, recognize our own humanity, and ask for help when we need it. If you're carrying more than you were built to hold right now, I hope this episode gives you permission to reset—and reminds you that help is not only available, it's brilliantly necessary. Be sure to and listen for these additional bits of Brilliance (if I do say so myself!). (Please note how each of these quotes relates to the Brilliantly Resilient process. Full disclosure, AI provided the quotes' relationship to the process--and I'll take it!) “There are times when you just have to put up your hand and say, ‘I need some extra help.’” → Reset: Acknowledging the need for support is strength, not weakness. “You learn how to not only feel when anxiety is coming on, but also recognize when it’s becoming too much for the tools you already have.” → Rise: Recognize when your resilience needs reinforcement. “I needed someone to hear me. I needed to acknowledge that I was being someone I didn’t want to be.” → Reveal: Brilliance comes from radical honesty with yourself. “You don’t always get what you need from those closest to you—and that’s okay. Sometimes you need a neutral, kind, third party.” → Reset: Your support system can extend beyond family. “My anxiety didn’t disappear, but I was reminded of tools I already had and ways I could make things better—not perfect, just better.” → Rise: Resilience is about better, not perfection. “I hate feeling vulnerable. But looking at hard things is the only way to grow.” → Reveal: Brilliance lives on the other side of discomfort. “It’s okay to let the ‘little black dog’ follow you around. But don’t let it sit in your lap.” → Reset: Live with awareness, not control by your emotions. “I needed to get back to someone who didn’t judge me and had no expectations of who I should be.” → Rise: Safe spaces are essential to becoming your best self. “You don’t have to know everything. You just need to be willing to say, ‘I’m out of juice right now.’” → Reveal: Admitting you’re depleted is an act of courage. “Please don’t assume you’ll just talk yourself out of dark places. Help is there—and there’s a reason for it.” → Reset and Rise: Don’t go it alone when there’s a lifeline available. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! With love and resilience, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/37669470

Episode 222: How to Redefine Success, with "No Half Cakes" Podcast Host and HeartCore Growth Founder Jim Sabellico 07/01/2025

Episode 222: How to Redefine Success, with "No Half Cakes" Podcast Host and HeartCore Growth Founder Jim Sabellico “I was standing there in front of this half-eaten birthday cake realizing like... what am I doing? This is not success.” Founder and Podcast Host How do you define success? Most of us are or were under the impression that success means money, status, and stuff--all obtained through a brutal amount of work and time. Jim Sabellico thought so too. At least until the night his wife had to relight the candles on his six-year-old son's half-eaten birthday cake so he could sing Happy Birthday to his boy. Jim missed the family moment because he was "busy working." Men have generally been tasked with being "successful" to provide for their families. Unfortunately, the definition of success has too often focused on money and materialism while leaving out family, relationships, presence and purpose. Jim's wake-up moment changed that for him. He began to reset by owning his situation clarifying his values (family, honor and integrity), and taking action to rise and rebuild his definition of success. Jim's commitment to reshaping his life served as a model for not only himself, but his children and others, particularly men who have sacrificed their relationships and sense of self to "success." That's when the No Half Cakes podcast was born. Since then, Jim has made it his mission to share his strategies for genuine personal and professional success through the No Half Cakes podcast and his HeartCore Program. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we recognize the power of perspective and taking the time to know and be true to your values to live a Brilliantly Resilient life. Learn more about , and be sure to listen to the . Tune into to hear more of Jim's wisdom and listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: “I had no relationship with my kids, no relationship with my wife... and by every other metric, I was a total failure.” “After I made the promise to myself, I started the hard part—recognizing that it’s not everyone else’s fault. I had to stop placing blame.” "If you don’t know where you are, no instructions will get you where you’re going. You need to know your starting point.” “You can't be good for other people if you're not good for yourself first.” “Your kids need to see you struggle. They need to understand that mom and dad are not perfect—and how we handle that matters.” “Children cannot be what they cannot see... you have to model the life you want them to emulate.” “I now live like there’s a documentary crew following me—I act with honor and integrity so there’s nothing to hide.” “Start journaling, talking, or even just voicing your feelings to yourself. That’s how you find the real you underneath it all.” “This isn’t an on/off switch. It’s a 0.2% shift every day. I’m a totally different person than I was five years ago—and that’s the goal." Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/37248675

Episode 221: Why your 20's Suck and What to Do About It with Kate Berski and "30 Phobia" 06/24/2025

Episode 221: Why your 20's Suck and What to Do About It with Kate Berski and "30 Phobia" "The 20s are not the best days of your life. It is a myth that needs to be busted.” ~ Kate Berski, Author: Ah, to be 20 again, right? After all, the 20s are supposed to be the best time of our lives, right? Not so fast. Kate Berski, author of notes that despite the myth, the 20's are a "tumultuous decade" full of self-doubt, unhealthy comparisons and societal pressure. Saddled with a demanding timeline that prescribes benchmarks that "should" be achieved, Kate recognizes that the To-do list for 20-somethings is not one-size-fits-all. She advises young people to take the time to reflect on what fits them, choosing to reset old standards with intention to fit their own values, skills and wants. With small, purposeful steps, 20-somethings can Rise to create a life that fits not predetermined milestones--get the corporate job, get married, buy the house, have the kids--but individual ones that evolve with a changing mindset and changing goals. The 20's can be a starting line fo discovery, provided we support young people who choose to forge a path that fits them. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we're firm believers in ditching what "should be" to make room for what "could be." In this case, a fulfilling life that allows individual Brilliance and Resilience to shine, without comparisons. Be sure to pick up a copy of and tune in to hear more of Kate's brilliance on Listen for these additional bits of brilliance: “I started to question the internal societal timeline I had internalized to the point of panic.” “Uncertainty is just a flag for opportunity.” “You don’t have to wedge yourself into a particular life path at 18.” “Stop looking out. Start looking in.” “You’re not failing. You’re not stuck. You’re just on someone else’s timeline." “There are no deadlines on dreams.” The 20's can be a time rife with opportunity--as long as young people have the courage to set their own goals and timeline. Let's support our young adults, and... Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/36840885

Episode 220: How to Reset, Rise, and Scale Your Business, with Ivy Slater, Author of "Best of the Best: Lead Boldly, Scale Rapidly, Create Your Legacy" 06/10/2025

Episode 220: How to Reset, Rise, and Scale Your Business, with Ivy Slater, Author of "Best of the Best: Lead Boldly, Scale Rapidly, Create Your Legacy" “Great leadership starts by leading with a mindset that's scalable—being willing to see things bigger. What would this look like if...?” ~ Ivy Slater, CEO of Slater Success and Author of What does the word "scalable" mean to you? If you are an entrepreneur, or work with an organization seeking to build (aren't we all?), the word "scalable" should motivate and inspire. Yet, "scalable" also holds some weight, and can be intimidating. Slater Success CEO and author Ivy Slater reminds us that all businesses are scalable. And if the word intimidates, Ivy says, “Scaling is intimidating to you? Throw the word out. Just say: I'm going to grow.” Grow. Yes; that we can do. Ivy reminds us that growth takes intention, flexibility, the willingness to pause, reevaluate and accept that scaling often comes not in giant leaps but in grounded, thoughtful steps. One of the most basic steps is intentional alignment with values-driven leadership, thus providing a strong foundation for present and future growth. Followed by imperfect but intentional action, scaling becomes a manageable process that also begins to create a legacy for a sustainable, growth-oriented organization. Ivy also reminds us to build relationships--one former client returned to her years later with a new project based upon their past relationship. Values, tribe, imperfect intentional action--all foundations of the Brilliantly Resilient method, useful in business and in life. Be sure to pick up your copy of . Tune into to hear more of Ivy's wisdom and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: “When you're faced with an obstacle and you're just looking at the obstacle, it doesn't disappear.” “It is not easy. When you're dealing with things that are spinning… what we want to do is ground it. And you ground it by stepping away, shifting your perspective, and asking: what is actually possible right now?” “Stop and take a breath. Walk away from your desk. Shift your environment, because when we stay in the same environment, we are a horse in a horse race running with blinders.” “If you're scaling a company and you don't know your values, it reflects in your hiring. It reflects in your clients. There has to be alignment or there's no opportunity to scale.” “Great leadership starts with leading with a mindset that's scalable—being willing to see things bigger. What would this look like if...?” “When you respond with an emotional reaction, you're doing a disservice to yourself. You don't get to look as brilliant as you truly are.” “Your best resources show up with an open mind and an open heart to see things from an unbiased opportunity.” Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/36800685

Episode 219: How to Navigate AI and the Changing Job Market, with Dr. Joan Palmiter Bajorek 05/30/2025

Episode 219: How to Navigate AI and the Changing Job Market, with Dr. Joan Palmiter Bajorek “My work directly acknowledges that anxiety (around AI) and talks about what actions we can take to take care of ourselves, our families, our communities, during a time that’s high opportunity but also really high volatility.” ~Dr. Joan Palmiter Bajorek AI Expert and Author of: Your AI Roadmap: Actions to Expand Your Career, Money and Joy" Are you afraid of AI? Artificial Intelligence has long been the stuff of science fiction, with the "artificial" becoming real and taking over the world. Yikes. But AI is here to stay, and according to AI expert, Dr. Joan Palmiter Bajorek, there ways to both utilize this amazing tool to work and live more efficiently and effectively, as well as to prepare for the changes, particularly in our work lives, that are to come. In her book, , Dr. Bajorek speaks directly to the fear and uncertainty that many professionals feel as AI transforms the job landscape. Yes, it can be scary, but AI also offers tremendous opportunities. Her first tip: get curious about AI. Acknowledge what's happening and play. Play? Yes. Simply opening Chat GPT or trying AI with a friend can not only decrease anxiety, but shift the mindset from fear to learning and intention. Further, it's essential to elevate your own profile or brand to become well known for your skill set--and AI can help to create a powerful online profile. It's also important to recognize that human relationships are still a major part of finding opportunities. Dr. Bajorek cites that 70% of post-COVID job seekers landed their next role through personal introductions—not job boards. Take control of your own narrative and actively engage with relationship building while utilizing AI as a tool. And AI is a tool, not a replacement. Humans still bring the creativity, strategy and discernment behind the machine. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we recognize the value of imperfect action--the playing in this scenario--to learn and build confidence. Play, and use AI as a tool to grow, enhancing your value and impact as we all move forward in this strange new world. Tune into for more of Dr. Bajorek's wisdom and listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: “We don’t have to be alone… Maybe you do it with a friend. Honestly, just having community around it—we don’t have to be alone.” “The number one thing I get is, ‘How do I get a job in AI?’ … In my book, the first part is about actually personal brand—being known for the work you’ve already done and being known for it online.” “Your network—how do people know you? … That’s the main route [to the next opportunity, not the side route.” “Even if you are in a supposedly stable career… take on some side projects, take on mentoring, because you never know when that kind of thing is going to lead to something else.” “Document your prompts in a Word doc. Keep those things—next time you do this task, here it is. You can do the next job more efficiently and well.” “I think the way I really see it...is that people who aren’t using these tools may be the ones first impacted by layoffs versus the ones that are working to augment, upskill, etc.” Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/36791965

Episode 218: How to "Live with Courage and Become an Everyday Leader" with Ash Beckham 05/15/2025

Episode 218: How to "Live with Courage and Become an Everyday Leader" with Ash Beckham "The hardest thing you've ever done is the hardest thing you've ever done. And it is no easier or harder than the hardest thing I've ever done.... Hard is hard." ~ , Everyday Leadership Coach, Inclusion Activist, TEDx Speaker and Author of Ash Beckham believes that the hardest thing you've ever done is valid simply because it was hard for you. Her approach encourages people to strip away comparison around struggle and instead recognize the commonality of the human experience--we all struggle. When we remember that whatever we are doing in relation to others, we are interacting with another human first, we create common ground, without judgement, allowing for greater communication, conversation, and progress in our work and personal lives. By immediately establishing empathy and recognizing the human experience as one we all share, we also create opportunities to lead, whether in a professional or personal capacity. Rooted in eight specific pillars (empathy, responsibility courage, grace, individuality, humor, patience, and authenticity), Ash's straigtforward leadership model focuses on understanding the humans we encounter, building leadership that isn't about controlling, but rather elevating collective strength. It's a reminder of the importance of the Brilliantly Resilient focus on building a tribe, which is much simpler and effective when we begin by recognizing the commonality of who we all are. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we believe everyone has their own Brilliance, just as Ash believes that anyone who shows up with compassion and courage has the potential to lead. By substituting curiosity for judgement, we not only reveal our own Brilliance, but also create space for others to shine. Be sure to check out Tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Ash's wisdom and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: Anybody from the Fortune 50 CEO to the bench warmer on the 7th grade basketball team has the power to lead in the way they show up every day. They just have to realize that they have that power. We don't necessarily pick where we become leaders. Leadership is a mindset. It's not a job title. Just because you're good at something doesn't mean you can lead. When we connect, you can collaborate. When you collaborate, you can move forward... it becomes more of a ‘you and I are doing this together’ than ‘I am telling you what to do.’ React to the other human and consider where they're coming from as well as where you're coming from. You can’t want diversity and not support it or you’re not going to get the benefits of having diverse perspectives. Every interaction you have with another human, you come out the other side changed—and so do they. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/36585840

Episode 217: Building Resilience Through Acceptance and "Owning Ataxia," with "A Good Calamity" Author, Jay Armstrong 04/30/2025

Episode 217: Building Resilience Through Acceptance and "Owning Ataxia," with "A Good Calamity" Author, Jay Armstrong "Lasting resilience begins with acceptance. For me, acceptance is an every day prayer." ~ Jay Armstrong Author of Are you struggling to accept something hard in your life? Are you even thinking about acceptance, or are you still fighting the hard truth? Jay Armstrong was diagnosed with ataxia (a degenerative disease of the brain and nervous system) in 2013, shortly after the birth of his youngest son. The disease affects Jay's movement, balance and speech, among other things. Jay notes that accepting his disease has been a challenge, but one that has helped him build lasting resilience. "You have to own your struggles," Jay says. "I no longer put my handicapped devices in the closet. I keep them out and say, 'This is who I am.'" (Jay has also named his walking cane Clark Able. Hahahaha!) As we often say in Brilliantly Resilient, owning our struggles not only builds resilience, but allows us to let go of what "should be," to make room for what "could be." In Jay's case, he "should not have been" stricken with ataxia, but it is his reality. Once we accept our reality, we're better able to determine what "could be" possible and take small, incremental steps to rebuild. Jay's new book , is the fourth book in his journey on living with his disease and its effect on his life and that of his family. It's funny, moving, and a testament to hard won resilience and wisdom. Tune in to hear more of Jay's wisdom on , and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: Hard won wisdom doesn't come easy, but it comes honest. A Good Calamity: Useful Essays and Poems on Living with a Disability This is the first time I owned the word "disability" by putting it on the cover of the book. I was owning it. I have to own everything. Part of my acceptance was littering my life with visual reminders. You have to own your struggles. I no longer put my handicapped devices in the closet. I keep them out and say, 'This is who I am.' My son asked me if I could go into the ocean and throw him into the water like another father was doing. And I had to say, 'No; I can't do that.' And that hurt...for a long time. Eventually, I realized that what I could do was be present. Presence matters. I can be there. And that's what my children will remember. That I was there. You eventually realize that no one is going to save you. Holding out hope for a cure becomes futile. What I tell other people and I tell myself is to accept this in little minute increments. Do little things to help yourself. Resilience is built one brick, one action at a time. Those dark times will come, but you're better able to muscle through them. Humor is an underrated survival skill. A big part of my survival is making my kids laugh. Take your humor seriously. Accepting is allowing others to see the hard truth of my life.... Now when someone asks if they can help me, I can be vulnerable with them.... When they ask if they can help, it's because they love me. I used to see it as pity; now I see it as love. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/36379365

Episode 216: Leading with Resilience, Compassion and Empathy with Catalynt Solutions Owner and CEO Meg Gluth 04/15/2025

Episode 216: Leading with Resilience, Compassion and Empathy with Catalynt Solutions Owner and CEO Meg Gluth "It doesn't mean all the snacks in the break room are the greatest. It means that you work in a place that recognizes the dignity of you as a person, recognizes the value of your contributions, and recognizes that you're a human being with things to do." ~ Meg Gluth, Owner & CEO, Catalynt Solutions, Inc. Meg Gluth knows about the "critical importance of compassion, empathy, and resilience" in leadership. Growing up in poverty in rural Iowa, Meg's challenges eventually drove her to turn to alcohol as an "inappropriate coping mechanism" as she navigated the turbulent waters of young adulthood. Despite her alcohol addiction, Meg finished college after 7 years (she was kicked out of her first college), and was admitted to law school--with no way to pay for it. A remarkable act of kindness and faith changed Meg's outlook on life when the father of a friend co-signed Meg's loans and allowed her to pursue her goal. Still a functional alcoholic and despite more devastating hardships, Meg got sober in 2011, and began working for the company she would one day own and become CEO. Meg now leads Catalynt Solutions, Inc., one of the largest certified women-owned chemical suppliers in North America. Meg's experiences taught her that "Life is a full contact sport," but she still believes there is room in leadership for kindness and empathy--along with the necessary accountability. Meg believes that holding her employees accountable while respecting their humanity encourages everyone to not only own their mistakes, but grow into being part of the solution to challenges. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know the importance of accepting responsibility and being accountable for our mistakes, as well claiming our wins. Growth and evolution happen when we realize that as humans, we will always have seasons of success and failure, but we can live and lead with kindness and grace through both. Check out for more and tune into to hear more of Meg's wisdom. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: Life is a full contact sport and our acceptance of that is sort of one of the key defining moments. I accept the full contact nature of the sport and I accept the discomfort. We look at people suffering and we don't want them to suffer. But the very suffering, the, the intensity of the suffering is what somebody like me needs in order to get out. Because change and resilience and healing and recovery is an inside job first. The start of resilience in a business is to say, OK, I see that you messed this up. I also know that you hold within you and this opportunity holds within it the seeds of some success to come from this failure. And I'm going to ask you to lead us out of it. That is the core of resilience. I'm not asking you to be perfect, but I'm asking to be a person that grabs for the rebound after you missed the shot. You can be compassionate. You can be kind and hold someone accountable. Accountability is the structure and the discipline and the knowledge for an employee, for a child, for a spouse. This is what it takes. These are my boundaries. This is what it takes to be successful. When people know where the bar is and they know where the line is, they feel more comfortable.somehow we've lost the narrative. We've lost the discussion around accountability, being loving. You are capable of being up here. You're performing down here? My job is to say to you I'm going to push you. I'm going to stretch you. I'm going to grow you to your capacity because I know when you're standing on the top of that line how good you're going to feel about yourself. And by the way, when you feel good about yourself and you're at your capacity, it turns into real. In this business, in life in general, I think it's OK to say I call myself a human centered capitalist because I I am. I don't make any secret of the fact that I want a for profit company that makes money. That's sort of the point. We can also be mindful in that that there is dignity and working hard and going home at the end of the day saying I earned this pay check. Where you are is the perfect place to start. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! (And click to buy your copy of From Broken to Brilliant: How to Live a Brilliantly Resilient Life, by me!!) XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/36044015

Episode 215: How to Develop Your Money Mindset with "She Grows Rich" Author Audrey Faust 03/31/2025

Episode 215: How to Develop Your Money Mindset with "She Grows Rich" Author Audrey Faust "Be involved in both your business and personal finances. 80% of women will die single. At some point in your life you are going to have to manage your finances. A man is not a financial plan." ~ Audrey Faust: Author of She Grows Rich; Expert CFO and Money Mindset Authority Are you in financial survival mode? Many women are. It's a mindset trap that many women, especially female entrepreneurs, can fall into. But it's possible to make the shift from survival mode to lasting wealth. Audrey Faust is the best-selling author of She Grows Rich. Audrey notes that "money is emotionally charged for women," often keeping them from approaching finances strategically, or ignoring finances all together. With simple, achievable, step-by-step strategies, Audrey helps women create confidence and empowerment around personal and business finances. She guides women on creating a financial blueprint, which she notes is different than a budget, as it lets women decide where their money goes and where they want to see it grow. By encouraging women to take charge of their finances and invest in themselves and their businesses, Audrey uses "reverse engineering" to help clarify action steps towards financial security and success. She also reminds entrepreneurs to charge what they're worth! (And why is that so hard????) Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know that education and action are essential to creating successful, fulfilling professional and personal lives. Further, in order to establish financial security and confidence, women need to take responsibility for themselves and their futures. To help you start on your journey to financial empowerment, Audrey is offering a free download titled Get your copy , and order your copy of Tune into to hear more of Audrey's wisdom and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: Mindset and financial strategies are the best combination for women and money. Women are givers and nurturers by nature, which can make it harder to focus on financial strategies. Women weren't even allowed to have a credit card in their own name until 1974. You need to financially invest in something to see results. Make sure your profit is what it would be if you were working in the marketplace. If you are closing 100% of your prospects, your prices are too low. Aim for a 50 to 80% closing rate. Take the judgement out of handling your finances. If you don't make a profit in your business within 3 years, the IRS can classify your business as a hobby, which means you cannot deduct expenses, there are no tax breaks and there is tax on any income. Be involved in both your business and personal finances. 80% of women will die single. At some pint in your life you are going to have to manage your finances. A man is not a financial plan. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! (And click to buy your copy of From Broken to Brilliant: How to Live a Brilliantly Resilient Life, by me!!) XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/35924325

Episode 214: How to Manage--and Change!--Chronic Pain with Pain Reprocessing Therapy and Patty Tashiro 03/04/2025

Episode 214: How to Manage--and Change!--Chronic Pain with Pain Reprocessing Therapy and Patty Tashiro "Acute and chronic pain are processed in different parts of the brain. If you aren't healing and are still in pain, it's possible that your brain has established learned neural pathways that can continue to cause pain, which becomes chronic." Patty Tashiro ~ Is your brain keeping you in pain? The emotional responses we have to trauma--which often stay with us--can trigger the brain to continue to send a physical pain response in our bodies. Huh? Isn't pain caused by a physical issue in the body? Well, yes. Unless it isn't. Patty Tashiro experienced a mother's nightmare when her daughter and her husband were rear-ended by a speeding car--and Patty, on the phone with her daughter, heard the whole thing. Patty's daughter, 10 at the time, had a severe brain bleed, but miraculously survived her injuries. Yet, despite her body healing from obvious physical injury, Patty's daughter continued to suffer from debilitating pain, confounding doctors. Finding no help from traditional physicians (One doctor told Patty that if her daughter "wasn't barfing, she should be in school,") Patty began researching and discovered Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy, which utilizes the brain's ability to "rewire" itself (neuroplasticity) to help those suffering to reprocess trauma and reduce the brain's reaction--thus lessening chronic pain. Patty continued exploring similar options and is now certified in brain health coaching and Pain Reprocessing Therapy. Clearly, seeking alternative help for her daughter required Patty to change her thinking and be willing to look at things differently. Here at Brilliantly Reseilient, we refer to seeing the world through a different "lens," being open to new ideas, experiences and opportunities to grow--and heal. To learn more, visit and tune in to this week's episode of the for these additional bits of wisdom: What is the brain's role in perpetuating pain? Our nervous systems are completely different depending on our life experiences.... How is your nervous system working--for you or against you? The brain is misreading friendly signals as danger, which can cause us to "learn" chronic pain over time. Neural pathways can create pain that becomes chronic. Your emotions or trauma can create physical pain in your body. If you are not healing, you may have moved into chronic pain. Your brain is misreading chronic signals as bad and perpetuating pain. Neuroplastic pain can be malleable. It can be changed. So how can we train our brain to feel safe? You are worth healing. If you're lying in your bed in pain, you're not able to share your gifts, and we need you! You can heal. And you can become Brilliantly Resilient. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/35534070

Episode 213: How to Expand Diversity and Inclusion to Include Everyone, with Toby Mildon 02/11/2025

Episode 213: How to Expand Diversity and Inclusion to Include Everyone, with Toby Mildon "There is diversity within diversity itself. Even people with shared disabilities have different experiences. We are all diverse. Diversity includes everyone." ~ Toby Mildon, Author of Inclusive Growth: Future-proof Your Business by Creating a Diverse Workspace, and Building Inclusivity: Making Your Workplace Equitable, Diverse and Inclusive How many people in the world are exactly like you? EXACTLY like you, no differences. The answer is no one. Every single person, because of countless factors including genetics, personal experiences, education, inherent skills--the list is endless--is unique. Toby Mildon, author and DEI expert, notes that when we broaden our definition of diversity to include everyone's unique skills and circumstances, and provide access in our workplaces for all to succeed, we "can increase creativity and innovation and problem solving because you have people with different perspectives and experiences." A wheelchair user for his entire life, Toby notes his personal experience with diversity, but also suggests that we must begin to think about other, less obvious aspects of diversity. Toby suggests that one of the keys to making DEI all-inclusive is finding commonalities and synergies between different groups. Toby says: "When we stop labeling groups and identifying them by a particular issue and realize everyone has the issue to some degree, implementing changes can benefit everyone in an organization," --a unifying benefit of DEI that uplifts the entire organization. At Brilliantly Resilient, we recognize the benefits of diversity and inclusion, both on a large scale and within our own lives. Seeking out others with different experiences, perspectives and talents helps us learn, grow and evolve--a key to living a Brilliantly Resilient life. Learn more about Toby on , and find Tune in for more of Toby's wisdom on this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: I've been on a Diversity and Inclusion journey myself. I've been a wheelchair user all my life. I have personal experience with diversity.... We have to be thinking about other aspects of diversity. Individuals are individuals. Everyone has their different starting points. You need to provide personalized adjustments and ways of working to level the playing field. When we stop labeling groups and identifying them by a particular issue and realize everyone has the issue to some degree, implementing changes can benefit everyone in an organization. If we take a social model of thinking into the workplace, we can ask ourselves what are the barriers people are facing? What roadblocks are in the way of people succeeding? We need to address those issues.... It's access to opportunities. When you recognize that the adversity that has kept people out is also what has allowed them to develop the skills that will bring value to the organization, we realize we need to even further expand our idea of diversity. You need to swiftly engage the senior management team and get them crystal clear on why DEI is important to the future of THEIR business.... Start with the organization's vision and mission and then move on to see how DEI will help them grow. A diverse workforce can increase creativity, innovation and problem solving because you have people with different perspectives and experiences. If people are too similar, you end up with "Group Think" and blind spots. Are we creating the environment of inclusion in companies where everyone can thrive? As an employer, you have a unique place in society to create a ripple effect. If you create an inclusive place to work where individuals can thrive, you can also affect society. It all starts with the opportunity to go to work and earn a living. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/35192815

Episode 212: Advocating for Kids Without "a Voice," with TeamChild's Christina Sorenson 01/28/2025

Episode 212: Advocating for Kids Without "a Voice," with TeamChild's Christina Sorenson The Maasai tribe of Africa greets one another by saying "How are the children?" We have to recognize that all the children in our community are our children. Christina Sorenson Attorney and Advocate for Foster Children at Christina Sorenson was in 15 different foster care homes from ages five to fifteen. Separated from her sister and eventually adopted at age fifteen, Christina has made it her life's work to provide legal and supportive aid for children and young adults in foster care. An attorney at in Seattle, WA, Christina has thoughtfully incorporated her own life experiences into her mission, bringing compassion, empathy and insights into the struggles of those in a foster system that frequently denies them a voice. Being a "foster kid" is often deeply traumatic, and this trauma can have a lasting effect, especially on a child. According to Christina, statistics show that kids in foster care experience PTSD at twice the rate of veterans who served in active combat. Having little to no personal agency to fight for themselves, kids in foster care can be further traumatized and therefore must rely on others to step in to advocate for them. Creating a supportive tribe is one of the bedrocks of living a Brilliantly Resilient life. As adults, we can cultivate relationships on our own, but it is our personal responsibility to assist and protect the young people in our communities who may have no one to help their voices be heard. Community engagement is essential to healthy lives both as individuals and as part of a group. One of the simplest ways to engage, according to Christina, is to become an empathetic listener and respect the voices of our children, thus becoming part of the solution. Tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to learn more about Christina's important work and for tips about how to get involved. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of Christina's Brilliance: Integrating it (my experience) into my identiy now as a part of who I am is exactly how I can bring that lived experience and perspective and empathy...it allows me to listen to others and their experiences in a different way. I try to bring in the general public by story telling. I thought I could do it through the science and the research, but nothing changed. I had to figure out how to do it and it's through telling the stories of these kids. The number one way to make sure a child will have resilience or succeed is if there is someone who deeply cares about them. And it doesn't have to be the same person all of the time. I remember at different times different people deeply caring about me. Resiliency does require community action. I needed the safety net of a community because as a child, sometimes the step you take is right off a cliff. We want resiliency to have a destination but we have to realize it is an ongoing journey. We need to give children the space to talk about the things happening to them and laying a foundation of trust. And we need to affirm their reality and what's happening in their lives. Reach out to Christina at: . Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/35030730

Episode 211: How to Live with a "Pilgrim's Heart" with Christine Eberle 01/14/2025

Episode 211: How to Live with a "Pilgrim's Heart" with Christine Eberle "Be where you are on the way to where you want to be going." ~ Christine Eberle, Author: "Be where you are on the way to where you want to be going." Um...huh? The above sounds like a riddle, doesn't it? Then again, isn't life a kind of riddle we try to figure out every day? Christine Eberle, author of , decided to seek clarity in answering life's riddle by undertaking a journey--literally and figuratively--as she and her husband walked the Camino of St. Ignatius Loyola in 2022. For the uninitiated, the Camino (there are two--one of St. James and one of St. Ignatius), is a walking pilgrimage along the paths travelled by the saints as they experienced their conversions and deepened their relationship with God. In modern times, walking the Camino is a journey of discovery and peace undertaken by those seeking the same. Those who travel the Camino consider themselves pilgrims--traveling the journey for spiritual growth and learning. Often, more human connections are formed as well, as Christine discovered. Undertaking the 676,000 step trek (with accompanying pain every day), Christine wanted to learn to live life "with a pilgrim's heart," meaning "We have a destination, and the destination is fixed, but we are very present to where we are in the given moment," Christine explains. In Brilliantly Resilient terms, this translates to several core concepts: Do not be married to outcomes, and let go of what "should be" to make room for what "could be." As we plan our life journeys and our desired outcomes, we must be willing to evolve. Do what you have to do but be willing to let the moments evolve as you move, perhaps slowly, towards where you want to be. Christine found some of her most moving experiences were with those who helped her in her vulnerable moments during the days she was forced to rest--not part of her plan. As we walk into 2025, consider your own journey with intention. Determine your destination, but allow for growth and change--and perhaps open yourself to some spiritual guidance along the way. Learn more about Christine Eberle , , and be sure to tune into this week's podcast and listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: It's being fixed. Having your destination fixed, but also being very present to exactly where you are. The goal in pilgrimage is to be where you are on the way to where you know your want to be going. We shouldn't fix our desires on (our definitions of success) or failure. Instead of fixing our desires, even those should float freely because our free floating desires can reveal God's deep desires for us. Of all the hopes and imaginings that preceded what is (currently) happening, open yourself to the grace that's being offered through the reality of what is (currently) happening. There is grace in the blisters. So there is a beauty in vulnerability that can allow us to grow if we will recognize that it's not a failure. (MF) Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/34767180

Episode 210: How to "Be Better" in 2025, with Mary Fran Bontempo 12/31/2024

Episode 210: How to "Be Better" in 2025, with Mary Fran Bontempo I came down to those two words. Be better. I think if we can boil it down to something, 'Be better' might be the most that we should be asking of ourselves. ~ Mary Fran Bontempo, Author It's 2025. How are you feeling about that? I find the time right after Christmas to be a bit challenging. After a month of being jolly buying, planning, decorating, eating, drinking, visiting with family and friends, suddenly it's over. And sure, New Year's Eve is fun, but it's also accompanied by that feeling of 'Oh my God, now I have to improve myself again.' Enter the dreaded New Year's Resolution. I've never been a fan of New Year's Resolutions (caps to emphasize the IMPORTANCE of them!). Usually, we end up expecting gargantuan feats of ourselves that we would never ask of anyone else--often dooming us to failure. Given that I'm at an age where I'm tempted to dismiss the whole thing, I'd like to, but I can't. I'm committed to living a Brilliantly Resilient life. Quitting entirely is not in the game plan. However, I do believe we must be more gentle with ourselves, in all of our human frailty. To that end, I've settled on two words for my 2025 resolution: Be Better. By simply resolving to be better, I'm afforded endless opportunities each day to improve in small ways, which bundled together, can create profound change. Each time I attempt to be better, I am living the Brilliantly Resilient concept of taking small, imperfect actions to move forward. So much easier and more life-affirming than trying to remake myself, which, let's be honest, isn't going to happen. (I will, however, try to be better when driving behind some soul who seems to have forgotten where the gas pedal is. Patience is not my strong suit.) As we enter 2025, be kinder to yourself, and resolve to Be Better. It's doable, and will create wins in every day. And do more that makes you happy. We all deserve that. Finally, thank you with sincere gratitude for your support of me and Brilliantly Resilient. It means more than I can say to share this powerful message for good and I am beyond appreciative. Tune in to hear more brilliance (yes, mine--remember to pat yourself on the back regularly, too!) on and check out for a great start to 2025. For me the time right after Christmas is a little bit hard. We've been so jolly and spirited for a month with buying and planning and family and friends and cooking and the lights and everything else, and then all of a sudden it's over. And sure, New Year's Eve is fun. But it's also accompanied by that feeling of 'Oh my God, now I have to improve myself again.' If we can be a little bit better every time we catch ourselves doing something that we don't like about ourselves...we can decide that's not the way we want to live. Mindfulness means being where you are. Be in that moment and just in that moment, try to be better. Come up with little short questions. Am I being better right now? Is this what I really want for myself right now? Am I here where I am right now? Be here and be better, instead of thinking about remaking yourself. Look back through your calendar of the last year. And review that. See the events that you went to see the things that you did and look at the ones that really made you happy. (Thank you, Fran Hauser!) I hope you all had a fantastic holiday season. I hope that the new year is full of light and joy and love and purpose and health and happiness for all of us. As we enter 2025, I thank you again and wish you every joy and blessing. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran Mary Fran Bontempo is an award-winning 2-time TEDx and Keynote speaker, workshop presenter, author, humorist and podcast host who teaches audiences to uncover their Brilliance and Resilience 15 minutes at a time. A sought-after speaker for ERGs, BRGs, DEI, conference and association events, Mary Fran is author of and co-founder of the life-changing program Brilliantly Resilient. To bring Mary Fran to your company or organization, visit /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/34675050

Episode 209: Mindfulness and Honoring the Pause with Shawnta Hooks 12/18/2024

Episode 209: Mindfulness and Honoring the Pause with Shawnta Hooks "I needed to embark on a journey to reclaim my connection, both personally and professionally." Shawnta Hooks ~ Leading Belonging and Mindfulness Speaker. Shawnta Hooks was never a believer in meditation or mindfulness. Working in accounting and corporate compliance during her 20 year corporate career, Shawnta found herself in a toxic work environment after a company reorganization, feeling completely disconnected, unseen and unheard. Her first instinct was to lay blame on the company, until she realized it wasn't entirely her work environment that was causing her challenges. Having just lost her father and become a new mom, Shawnta realized that she was not only disconnected from her work, she was disconnected from herself. Aware of a "crushing pressure to contatntly perform," both professionally an personally, Shawnta realized she had some work to do, and set out to learn how to reconnect to her world. Her search led her to meditation and mindfulness, and "honoring the pause"--that moment of neutrality between our thoughts and actions, when we can more accurately assess our feelings and behaviors. Now a leading authority in building connection and mindfulness in corporate America, Shawnta notes that while words like mindfulness and authenticity may not seem to fit into business, many organizations are embracing the opportunity to help their employees find connection through mindfulness, or as Shawnta notes, "Paying attention to the present moment, on purpose, without judgement." Being Brilliantly Resilient requires checking our perceptions and telling ourselves the truth, which fits well with Shawnta's advice. During this hectic time of year, consider beginning a meditation practice, even of only a few minutes a day. Seek mindfulness and neutrality, avoiding judgements (especially as emotions run high around the holidays.) to hear more of Shawnta's Brilliance. Visit her website at and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: There is a huge impact that moments of calm can have on your productivity, on your focus, on your ability to operate at peak performance. When employees feel more connected to their environments, they produce greater results and one way that you can get employees to feel connected to their environment is to help them learn how to be connected to the present moment. Belonging requires connection and you can't do that if you stay in your own little box. For me, belonging is really when you, as an individual feel heard and supported in your environment. Just because you think a thought doesn't mean you have to believe it. This is about honoring your emotions. Emotions are clues. By not honoring that, you're missing an opportunity to connect with another. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/34520925

Episode 208: New Book! From Broken to Brilliant: How to Live a Brilliantly Resilient Life, with Mary Fran Bontempo 12/04/2024

Episode 208: New Book! From Broken to Brilliant: How to Live a Brilliantly Resilient Life, with Mary Fran Bontempo You have everything in you already to live a Brilliantly Resilient life. You have Resilience and you have your own personal Brilliance. It's already there. You were born with both of those things. ~ Mary Fran Bontempo, Author, From Broken to Brilliant: How to Live a Brilliantly Resilient Life Have you uncovered your Resilience yet? Since Covid, we’ve been reminded constantly about the need for resilience, as though every day, we must gird for battle before we wander into the unknown terrors of the world. Truthfully, that scenario doesn’t seem that far-fetched anymore. If you’ve followed Brilliantly Resilient for any amount of time, you know I believe that life can hit hard, and unexpectedly. Almost everyone can offer a story to back that up. The good news is that we already have everything we need within us to not only navigate life’s challenges with Resilience, but we can discover our Brilliance within those challenges as well. My new book, , provides a roadmap to learn how to Reset with Resilience, Rise through challenges, and Reveal your Brilliance—a Brilliance that shows itself when it feels like things can’t get much worse. As I come up on the five-year anniversary of the founding of Brilliantly Resilient, I’m more convinced than ever that the simple steps in the Reset, Rise and Reveal process can guide anyone through rough times, and provide the light we need to move forward. The book contains not only my thoughts, but the generously shared wit and wisdom provided by over 30 Brilliantly Resilient podcast guests, who, in their own words, affirm that a Brilliantly Resilient life can be ours if we live with intention. In addition to much shared wisdom, the book offers some thought-provoking questions at the end of each chapter—for you to navigate YOUR challenges. Because yes, this is all about YOU. From Broken to Brilliant is now available on , and makes a perfect holiday gift. Check out this podcast for more info, or head over to or . And be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance (if I do say so myself!!!) This book is the road map. It gives you steps that are so simple and easy and what you're going to realize is that you're already doing this stuff. You're already doing it, you just have to be intentional about it. Recognize that you're doing it (being Brilliantly Resilient) and build that foundation from that. When we experience a big crisis, we want a big solution. Unfortunately, that doesn't happen. You don't get the big solution with a big crisis. A crisis is solved by small, imperfect action steps. Failure becomes associated with shame, and we forget that failure is part of resilience. You have to try things. You have to get up and try them again. But when we associate failure with shame, then we don't try. And that's when we forget that we have this inborn resilience. There’s no judgment about what your crisis or your challenges are. There's no judgment because it's yours. Everything that you're going through refers back to you. Don't compare yourself to anyone else. It's your crisis. The reset with resilience encompasses 3 things. It encompasses your values. It encompasses your perception or your perspective, and it encompasses controlling the controllables. Build your tribe. You can't be brilliantly resilient in a vacuum. You need to access your tribe. Taking imperfect action means you are willing to recognize that the actions not perfect, and guess what? The outcome is not probably going to be. Buy the book and do let me know what you think. Let’s be Brilliantly Resilient together! Best, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/34291195

Episode 207: Finding the Brilliance and Resilience in Generational Relationships with "Gentelligence" Author, Dr. Megan Gerhardt 10/22/2024

Episode 207: Finding the Brilliance and Resilience in Generational Relationships with "Gentelligence" Author, Dr. Megan Gerhardt Let's have smarter intergenerational conversations. Let's be OK and not threatened by the fact that you see this differently than me. Let's figure out why and how that could actually be helpful and beneficial. Dr. Megan Gerhardt Author of Do you work with people of different generations? Do you live with people of different generations? Do you have public contact with people of different generations? Unless you live alone on an island, the answer to at least one, if not all, of these questions is yes. And in your interactions with those of different generations, it’s almost certain that you’ve experienced some form generational conflict. Dr. Megan Gerhardt is a Professor of Management and Leadership at the Farmer School of Business at Miami University, and the author of As an expert in generational differences, Dr. Gerhardt teaches individuals and corporations simple, effective strategies for not only bridging the generation gap, but encouraging all generations to bring their particular resilience and brilliance to create connection and build respect. According to Dr. Gerhardt, the best way to build connections is by asking respectful questions. The best question to ask? “Can you help me understand?” By phrasing the question in a non-judgmental way, Dr. Gerhardt says, “I'm signaling that what you're doing is not making sense to me, but I'm acknowledging it might in part be my understanding of what's going on. And I would love to get to a different place.” Given that every generation brings their own skills, knowledge and perspective to the table, respect and inclusivity can result in more understanding and better solutions to problems, especially when everyone brings their own experiences, resilience and brilliance along. For more on Gentelligence, tune into this week’s episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, order the book, and look for these additional bits of Brilliance: I am a organizational psychologist really by training. So my nature is to always be curious about people, why they do what they do, how do we help them leverage what's unique about them in order to help them do work they care about and add value. How do we change the narrative so that instead of shaming people for being born in a different generation…they're starting their career at a different time. We are really trying to learn from those complementary experiences and kinds of expertise and we're taking advantage of it. Every few years there's an article that comes out saying, let’s stop putting people in generational categories…I don't think that's the answer…. It's better than being biased against people because of their age or their generation, but then you're ignoring all of that wonderful, very valid difference that comes with growing up and starting your career during a different period of time and a different period in history. And that's real. Let's have smarter intergenerational conversations. Let's be OK and not threatened by the fact that you see this differently than me. Let's figure out why and how that could actually be helpful and beneficial. If I ask you a question and that feels very respectful. I'm not assuming I'm not judging, I'm asking because I'm interested. You're worth it. I think there's something of value there that I want to engage with. And then there's learning and hopefully that's reciprocated. Is there a question that works universally? Absolutely. My favorite one…is “Can you help me understand?” I'm signaling that what you're doing is not making sense to me, but I'm acknowledging it might in part be my understanding of what's going on. And I would love to get to a different place. Let’s be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/33514987

Episode 206: How to Mourn the Loss of a Sibling with Annie Orenstein, Author of Always a Sibling: The Forgotten Mourners Guide to Grief 10/08/2024

Episode 206: How to Mourn the Loss of a Sibling with Annie Orenstein, Author of Always a Sibling: The Forgotten Mourners Guide to Grief No one checks in on them, right? They often delay their own grief, put off their own mourning in order to support their parents and step up. But then? They remain there and they never really get a turn to express their own grief, or to be the mourner in the room. Annie Orenstein ~ Author of Do you have a sibling? Most of us do. And according to author, Annie Orenstein, as children, we often spend more time with our siblings than with our parents. Yet as we grow, our sibling relationships are pushed to the background as we form other adult relationships in our lives. So what do you do when a sibling dies? In her new book, Annie recognizes the painful, difficult role of a remaining sibling when losing a brother or sister. Our siblings are the only true witnesses to so much of our childhoods and who, “understand the workings of our families.” If the sibling dies before parents, grieving is even more fraught as the remaining sibling feels the need to lessen the parents’ burden. Further, the death of a sibling is often met with the question, “Were you close?” as though the answer allows the degree of acceptable mourning. Annie notes that the simplest gift we can give someone who has lost a sibling is to ask, “What was their name?” to allow the sharing of memories. Annie recognized the need to address such questions when finding little to guide her through the loss of her own brother. As she explores the stages of grief, she breaks down experiences in sections noting life with, without, and finally within, as she met both her grief and her joy in life with her sibling in this poignant and funny (yes, funny!) read. Such fundamental change is a part of life, but knowing that doesn’t make it easier. Part of living a Brilliantly Resilient life is facing such challenges and finding the way through that’s best for you, regardless of “what’s expected.” For more of Annie’s wisdom, tune into this week’s episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: Siblings should be naturally our longest shared relationship because we meet them before we meet our partners and if things go naturally, our relationship continues after the loss of our parents. Statistics show that in childhood, siblings spend more time together than with their parents. We shared our childhood with these people. They are in many instances the only other people who remember our childhood and who understand the inner workings of our family, who understand our parents, for good, bad, or ugly., It is terrifying to see your parents lose a child and to see that kind of deep grief. And it's known as a double loss because you really do lose your parents to some extent in that loss, because they're never the same. Someone will ask how your parents are doing but not ask how you're doing. They are really well meaning, but what you take away is, ‘Oh. were we close enough that I'm allowed to grieve? Am I? Why is no one asking if I'm OK? I guess I'm supposed to be. The simplest question you can ask someone who has lost a sibling is, ‘What was their name?’ You don’t get to say their name anymore. It feels good to say their name again. Ask how they lived, not how they died. Be sure to buy Annie's wonderful book, and let’s be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/33376422

Episode 205: Empowering Those Who Stutter, with Nolan Stuttering Foundation President, Brian Nolan 09/24/2024

Episode 205: Empowering Those Who Stutter, with Nolan Stuttering Foundation President, Brian Nolan “I'm trying to open stutter more. Because I I've reached a level of of acceptance that I'm proud of, but I'm nowhere near where I need to be. I interview people on podcasts who openly stutter, and I'm so proud of them because they do it without shame and that's the real issue. The real issue is shame, every day, when you stutter.” Brian Nolan President and Co-founder, Have you ever heard someone stutter? If you don’t stutter, it can be uncomfortable to know how to react. Do you try and finish the person’s sentence? Do you look away? Do you simply wait? While a non-stutterer may be at a loss, according to Brian Nolan, a life-long stutterer and President of the Nolan Stuttering Foundation, a non-stutterer’s discomfort pales in comparison to the shame, embarrassment and pain of someone who stutters. As humans, speech is our major means of communication, one we generally take for granted. But as a stutterer, Brian notes, “Especially as a kid, every day you wake up, you think through the lens of someone who stutters and you think about the people you're going to have to see, how you're going to have to talk in class. Am I going to have to read? And you're like, I just have to get by the day, every day.” For those who stutter, the stress of having to plan every moment of a day’s communication seems simply unbearable. Stuttering isolates individuals, from childhood throughout every experience in life. Having gone through every challenge personally, Brian and his co-founder, Joseph Donaher, created the Nolan Stuttering Foundation (NSF) to help teens and young adults who stutter prepare for major transitions in their lives while persevering through challenges to become the best version of themselves. Those who don’t stutter can help, too. When encountering someone who stutters, Brian advises we “look, listen, and give the gift of 100% attention.” As Brian says, “We who stutter, we have grit. We who stutter, we have empathy. We who stutter, listen carefully. And we stay in a conversation.” The rest of us can respond in kind. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know that we can find our Brilliance in our challenges, but it’s rarely easy. When we respond to others with patience, empathy and understanding, we can not only help others find their Brilliance, but uncover some gifts of our own. Tune in to this week’s podcast to hear more of Brian’s wisdom and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: Stuttering is a neurological disorder and the part that's miss understood is people think you stutter because you're nervous. Two-thirds of the people who have it, it goes away by the time they are 7 or 8. The 1/3 of the people who get it and it doesn't go away by 7-8, it's not curable. Ever. I'm a public speaker. I talk for a living. If you would have asked me when I was 16 if I was going to do that, I would have said oh, wow. Fact is my dad said, Brian, think about being a computer programmer because you don't have to talk to people. And that was really, really, really, really sad for me. Because you see, I pretended to be an introvert because that meant that I wouldn't have to talk much. People who stutter, they get that look from people who are looking at them like what's wrong with him. And so they they look away…or they finish our sentences. That gives us more shame. I am still so uncomfortable stuttering on this podcast. I will switch a word and you won't even know it because I'm so good at switching words. But there's shame in that, because I can't say the word (I want to use) now. You can actually order something you don't even want. Can I tell you how many times that happens? Yeah. You order a coffee because you can say coffee and because you don't think the person in front of you is gonna have the patience or you don't want to be embarrassed. No one talks about stuttering in families. It's the biggest secret everybody knows about. And maybe if we don't talk about it, it'll go away. And that makes it worse. Now my biggest fear is that a young kid is not going to go to college or not apply for a job because they're afraid of the interview process. So now I run workshops for kids who stutter. We practice interview skills, we practice disclosure. This most important thing you could do is to disclose. Hey, it may take me a little longer to get things out because I stutter, but it doesn't mean I don't know my stuff. The people who stutter need to stop being covert, and they need to reach out and get involved with one of the many stuttering foundations that are out there like the Nolan stuttering. Be sure to check out the . Let’s be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/33178952

Episode 204: How to Love Yourself, with Best-Selling Author (And Ellen DeGeneres Favorite!) Rachel Madorsky 09/10/2024

Episode 204: How to Love Yourself, with Best-Selling Author (And Ellen DeGeneres Favorite!) Rachel Madorsky “Here’s the myth I want to break: that self-love is selfish. The more we love ourselves, the less attention we have on ourselves and the more generous we become in a very natural, easy, relaxed way.” ~ Rachel Madorsky Do you love yourself? Does even reading the question make you uncomfortable? And if it does, why? If you squirmed a little reading the above, you’re not alone. Most of us will gladly think about those we love and share that with others. But ask us about self-love? Yikes. Rachel Madorsky is a psychotherapist, executive coach, speaker and best-selling author of the book (A short, delightful read that was featured in Ellen DeGeneres’ first ever 12 Days at Home Holiday Box in November, 2023!) After battling with depression, Rachel experienced a turning point when a fellow student in a personal growth course turned to her and said, “All of this would get better if you would love yourself.” As Rachel notes, “In that moment I felt like someone just gave me the cure, and at the same time I wanted to say what does that mean? It’s an easy thing to say but no one tells us what it means or how to do it.” On this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, Rachel dispels many misconceptions about self-love, most notably that far from being selfish or self-indulgent, self-love frees us from negative focus on ourselves and gives us more time and ease to love and be generous with others. She also makes a topic which many find uncomfortable, unthreatening and accessible. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we don’t shy away from tough topics, and self-love fits the bill. Rachel advises regularly asking “What is the most loving thing I can do for myself right now?” Fortunately, the answer needn’t involve huge steps. Even the smallest step towards self-love and self-care can change the trajectory of a life. As Rachel notes, “Small hinges swing big doors.” Tune in to this week’s podcast to hear more of Rachel’s wisdom and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: When we ask a question of ourselves and we listen to the answer and we say yes and do the thing, we are building self-trust at a whole new level…. No one can actually give us the things we need most better than ourselves. We think that being hard on ourselves is the thing that will make us better. But the more forgiving, and loving and generous we are with ourselves, the faster the healing, the more we’re capable of giving, the more we’re capable of receiving. It’s important to forgive ourselves and say “I was so human in that moment.” We think we are being so loving and forgiving to everyone else, but another truth is we can only take someone as far as we are willing to go. So if we start giving from the overflow (of our own love) rather than our own depletion, it’s a higher quality of care for others. Everyone is always worthy of more love. Open the door for more love. You can exponentially expand your ability to give and love, and giving and receiving is a circle. The more we actually allow ourselves to receive the more we have to give. There is a distinction between taking and receiving. Receiving makes you feel satisfied. Small hinges swing big doors. If we were in a boat or a plane and we changed direction by only 2 percent,we would end up on a different continent. A very small action repeated can change the trajectory of our life. Any place we can add more sweetness with the intention of growing our self-love knowing it will grow love for others is a life changer. Be sure to find Rachel on her website and social media: The Book: Let’s be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran /episode/index/show/brilliantlyresilient/id/32950237

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