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Know Thyself - The Magic Of Self Awareness

Imperfect Mens Club

Release Date: 12/12/2024

Trump Derangement Syndrome And The 10 Commandments show art Trump Derangement Syndrome And The 10 Commandments

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark introduces the topic by reading the definition and symptoms As much as the guys believe it to be real, it’s also funny Jim asks Mark what “Psychic pathology” means and he takes a shot Jim shares his opinion about friends and family that seem to struggle with this Jim talks about his mom. She exhibits physical manifestations Mark thinks this physical reaction indicates a pretty severe condition Jim calls it impulsive Mark calls Trump insensitive and crass. He’s a fighter and not a politician Mark talks about one friend who is very smart, but can’t remain objective when Trump’s...

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90% Of Life Is Just Showing Up show art 90% Of Life Is Just Showing Up

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark introduces the topic and frames it in the context of his recent experience with having a plumber show up at his home to do some work He shares how gratitude plays a part in the discussion. He expresses a concern that the topic is so rich that staying on topic might be tough Jim reflects on the story Mark has already told him Jim expands on the “Showing up” concept Jim shares his perspective having been a tradesman and having gone into many homes and being treated poorly, more often than not. He applauds Marks treatment of the plumber Jim expands on the notion of appreciation and gives...

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The Disingenuous Epidemic - Cowards, Clowns, and Characters show art The Disingenuous Epidemic - Cowards, Clowns, and Characters

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark introduces the topic of disingenuous people. Both guys have had recent experiences with people who were being disingenuous. Mark asks whether he thinks people are born this way or do become this way based on environment or circumstance. Jim says he’s been using that word more often lately Mark reads the legal definition of the word Jim shares his definition. He clarifies the nuance of this activity being intentional Mark says there are different levels of it, but that some people are just stupid Jim shares his recent encounter with a disingenuous neighbor Deception from the get go. Jim...

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How A Simple Framework Can Help Us Communicate With Candor And Clarity show art How A Simple Framework Can Help Us Communicate With Candor And Clarity

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark brings up the topic of communication in the context of self talk and self reflection Then he shares a framework Jim brought that he uses for communication. The triple A method Assumptions/Agreement/Action Mark is a fan Jim brings up a favorite quote of his - “The most important conversation you’ll ever have is the conversation you have with yourself”…and that’s a crazy person Mark shares his self talk routine Jim - simply…you have to turn the channel He shares how his mind works. He finds or creates tools to help him. That’s where this AAA framework came from. He uses it to...

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Personal Stories Of Neurodivergence - The Ability To Think Different show art Personal Stories Of Neurodivergence - The Ability To Think Different

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark introduces the guys and topic. He cites how aligned both guys are. As they enter the call they’re thinking of the same topics and thoughts Neurodivergence (See definition at the bottom of the show notes) Mark shares a call about his grandson and his current struggles which may well involve him being on the spectrum Jim shared his perspective about labels and crutches and his own story about being neurodivergent himself growing up Jim’s perspective is to reframe this label as an opportunity to think of things differently Neither guy likes meds, but do agree that in some cases they can...

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Beware The Beware The "Vortex". Aging Gracefully In Relationships

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark introduces the topic of male and female relationships. Jim had brought up the recent Bill Belichick  interview with his new 24 year old girlfriend Jim covers our framework and the wheel of life. Relationships is one of the five and women is a subset of that Jim likes looking at life in increments of 10 years. Now we’re both in our 60’s and things have changed Jim brings up the Belichick interview in the context of self awareness and how he was not self aware at all Both guys lost respect for him Mark goes back to his relationship with his girlfriend and brings up how recently he...

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Confidence Isn’t a Trait, It’s a Practice show art Confidence Isn’t a Trait, It’s a Practice

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark introduces the topic of confidence.  Self-confidence The topic originated with Jim’s interest in elitism - entitlement - self-accountability - confidence In order to be self accountable, one must be confident Jim ties in the current news events and his recent book as he frames his view of confidence. Particularly sports and business He distinguishes between confidence and the competence required to be confident Jim brings up academia. See civically Harvard…and entitlements/elitism He shares the academic idea that perfection is attainable. We both support the reality of...

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Frameworks: The Invisible Structures Behind A Well Lived Life show art Frameworks: The Invisible Structures Behind A Well Lived Life

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark shares the value of the “pregame” the guys use to prepare for the podcast He introduces the topic of frameworks How they can be good or harmful Jim shares how frameworks evolve and how ours did. Our tagline “The Imperfection Is The Perfection” Jim used this with his kids when they got frustrated with him He thinks imperfections and failures make us who we are Jim shares how when we started the podcast, we were thinking of “Civill Discourse” as a theme. Then we came upon our Wheel Of Life Jim takes us around the wheel and digs into all 5 areas of life and then some deeper...

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The Freedom of Solitude: Evolving Beyond Our Old Personas show art The Freedom of Solitude: Evolving Beyond Our Old Personas

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark introduces the topics of solitude and one’s persona Jim jumps in to help contextualize this discussion Mark reads the definitions of  “Persona” and “Solitude” Mark asks Jim about his trip Jim separates being alone for a few minutes from the very different version of a 7 day solo trip Jim has chosen solo trips in the last few years He reflects on how his roles and personas have changed as he’s aged He talks about not caring what others think and how freeing that is Mark reflects on the solitude that can from his divorce. He didn’t choose that but did choose how to...

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The Science of Self-Talk: How Thoughts Shape Our Reality show art The Science of Self-Talk: How Thoughts Shape Our Reality

Imperfect Mens Club

Mark introduces the topic of the power of the mind and self-talk The idea that we now have science and data to support the value of positive talk, visualization and vibration in influencing our happiness and peace of mind Jim got the idea from Billy Carson’s appearance on Lewis Howe’s Greatness podcast Jim shares the story of how we met. He was struggling mentally and emotionally and had some evidence that concussions might be part of his challenge. In his research, he found me. He flew out to Orlando and we met. Jim tells his concussion story and the details of his journey toward a...

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Mark introduces the topic of self awareness. He shares that their “pregame” discussion was very self reflective. He suggests that the time of year, as well as some other personal events from Jim’s life and Mark’s have the guys a bit mired in self reflection and self awareness

Mark reads a couple of quotes Jim brought to the recording. One secular (Stoic) and one Biblical (Thomas)

Jim shares some context for his quotes and shares his position on self awareness and what’s going on in his life

Jim reflects on yesterday being the 5 year anniversary of his father’s death. He says to really understand yourself, you have to go back in time. Family history and stories. Jim came across some photos of his dad he’d never seen before. Then he reflects a bit on his grandparents (4 grandparents/four quadrants - that shape you)

Jim asks about Mark’s conversation with his dad and comments about “peeling back Jim’s onion”

He talks about piling multiple issues all on top at once and how that makes tough stuff even tougher

Are we getting more “Imperfect” or more self aware

Mark shares his mom and dad’s influence and then describes his memories of his grandfathers…not from memory but from stories

Jim returns to our fathers and specifically his relationship with his father. How he has gained appreciation and gratitude for his dad since his death. Jim also suggests that he’s grown too

Mark gives Jim kudos for being personally accountable with all these things for being responsible for his response to hardship and challenge. Learning from his experiences

Mark shares that his dad also had 10 brothers and sisters too. Both guys are also middle children

Mark shares his self image

Jim shares another saying/quote about virtues and vices

They discuss both. Jim thinks we all strive to be the best versions of ourselves

Mark reflects on being fathers of young adult kids and what fathers face as their kids get older - more people more problems How to navigate these additional relationships. They joke about the meaning of love and different types of love

Intimacy, jealousy, all the emotions

Mark says it’s also a function of the time of year

Jim shares his experience going through the photos of his dad. He got them touched up - colorized and they came to life. He reflects about how his father tried to discuss these things with Jim when he was younger

Mark brings up his mom’s suicide and how his feelings have evolved as time has gone by. For his kids too

Mark says self awareness enables us to address and feel these things

Jim asks Mark to speak more about his mom. Mark talks about his younger brother and how he feels like he inherited his troubles from his mother

Mark goes deep on his mom’s suicide story. How he went from anger to sadness to forgiveness and empathy/love

Mark is grateful for her now.  He sees her asa troubled soul

Jim says we’re all troubled souls

Mark thinks there are two types of people. Melancholy and not melancholy

Jim asks about Mark’s father. Mark says his dad was the exact opposite. He shares his parents divorce and some of the details

Jim asks more about Mark’s mom. Did he recognize his mom’s condition when he was young

Mark oversimplifies the impact his parents had on his 3 siblings and himself. He shares some suicide and addiction reflections

Jim begins to wrap up and Mark adds a takeaway

We are all going through stuff. We’re not alone

Mark loves the 4 quadrant approach of your 4 grandparents

Jim reflects on how this episode relates to our flywheel

Relationships and worldview

As our family members get older…more episode material:)