Delight Your Marriage

Husbands and wives were designed to be different. You want different things in marriage and intimacy on every level (emotional, spiritual, and physical). Whether you're a wife or a husband, whether you're suffering or pretty good... and you're looking for Bible-based insights and scriptural practical guidance on how to transform your marriage, you've found the right podcast! We have "transformation stories" that will inspire hope that putting into practice these principles, by God's grace, can truly change your intimacy completely. If you're looking to see how to transform your marriage sign up for a free Clarity Call, we can hear your story and work with you to determine if we are confident we can help you: https://www.delightyourmarriage.com/cc

474-Her Marriage Was "Dissolving", Now It's Saved & Growing: Kalee's Story 03/14/2025

474-Her Marriage Was "Dissolving", Now It's Saved & Growing: Kalee's Story Her Marriage Was "Dissolving", Now It's Saved & Growing: Kalee's Story Before she began the Delighted Wife program, Kalee was in a place of deep discouragement. She and her husband, Chris, had been married for eight years, built a beautiful family together, and yet, they felt utterly lost. Their marriage was dissolving, and hopelessness had settled in. She didn’t see a way out. But God did. In His divine intervention, Chris was introduced to the program through a friend who had experienced transformation in his own marriage. Chris took a step of faith, signed up for the program, and invited Kalee to do the same. What she didn’t realize was that the biggest transformation wouldn’t just be in her marriage—it would be in herself. Finding Confidence, Finding Herself Kalee entered the program believing that her marriage was the only problem. But as she journeyed through the teachings, she came to see something deeper. She lacked confidence. She didn’t understand her worth. She had been seeking validation in others, rather than allowing God to restore her from the inside out. Through the program, Kaylee began to see how deeply God loved her, how valuable she was, and how her identity wasn’t defined by the struggles of the past. And as she changed, so did her marriage. A Marriage Restored Kalee and Chris both went through the program separately, which turned out to be a gift. After years of couples’ therapy, they found that what this program allowed them to do was heal separately rather than working together. Instead of coming at each other with blame, they were each able to focus on their own growth, healing, and the changes they personally needed to make. The result? A marriage that was once on the brink of destruction was now filled with trust, forgiveness, and connection. The barriers of past hurts were broken down, and they began to see each other through fresh eyes. Kalee describes it as the first time in years she didn’t feel fear lingering in her mind about the future of their marriage. She and Chris were finally on solid ground, and for the first time in a long time, they had peace. A Ripple Effect of Joy in Her Home But this transformation didn’t just stay between Kalee and Chris—it overflowed into their home. Their children, especially their oldest daughter, began to experience the difference. Their daughter, who had been cautious and unsure about marriage because of what she had witnessed in their home, was now talking about her own future as a wife and mother. In her playtime, she began to play “Mom” and “Wife”, something that Kalee had never seen before.Where once there was tension and uncertainty, now there was joy. She saw her parents in a new light—loving, affectionate, and truly connected. There is Hope for You Maybe you find yourself where Kalee once was. Maybe you feel hopeless, uncertain, and afraid that your marriage won’t survive. But let me encourage you—God is still in the business of restoring marriages. He still brings beauty from ashes. He still makes all things new. If Kalee’s story resonates with you, I invite you to take a step toward healing. Don’t let fear or hopelessness hold you back. Your marriage can be transformed. Your home can be filled with peace and joy. It starts with taking that first step. God bless you on your journey. He is able, and He is faithful. Love, Belah & Team PS - If you're ready to take the step that Kalee made, schedule a free Clarity Call . Not quite ready for that yet? Take our free online to learn more about the current health of your marriage and next steps to take. PPS - Here is a quote from (another) recent graduate: "I feel so much more joyful. I have learned how to be playful and silly again…I am growing in my understanding of my value based on Christ's righteousness, not my own accomplishments. My eyes have been opened to many areas where I am Martha instead of Mary…I have so much more hope for the future…We are a more joy-filled family…there is HOPE and we are healing!” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/35700640

473-Energy and Motivation God's Way 03/07/2025

473-Energy and Motivation God's Way Getting out of your bed in the morning requires motivation. Doing your work requires motivation. Sacrificing for your spouse the way God asks us to, requires motivation. You may be motivated by external forces like your boss, achieving certain bank account numbers, or a personal feeling of accomplishment. Those aren't necessarily bad. But if you're having trouble with motivation for the things that are most important in your life: God, marriage, kids... this episode is for you. There are two encouragements Jesus gives us that can really help with your motivation to do what is most important: 1- The parable of the Three Servants (Matt 25: 14 - 28) 2- Come to me and I will give you rest -- the burden I give you is light (Matt 11: 28 - 30) The parable talks of three servants entrusted with money while the master went on a long trip. One was entrusted with 5 bags of silver, another with 2 bags of silver and the last with 1 bag of silver. When the master returned, two of the three had "worked" and "invested" which doubled their silver. But the servant with just 1 bag didn't even try. He was in self-pity, covetousness and fear. The master called him wicked and lazy. May we not fall into the trap of a - Self-pity: aka pride, because we SHOULD have a better circumstance. God SHOULD have given us better. b - Covetousness: looking at someone else's perceived lot in life and crave it c - Fear: Our perspective of God is harsh and unfair so we are paralyzed to try. Instead, let us look forward to hearing our master's praise. Let us be motivated by the anticipation of seeing God on that day say "well done!" and lavish praise on us for doing what He has asked us to do with what He has entrusted to us. If this feels like such a heavy weight right now, I want you to be encouraged by the second portion of scripture where Jesus invites us to come to Him with our burdens. And learn from Him. And gain insight on what He ACTUALLY is asking of us. Not to carry the whole world -- but to gain insight into what His burden for us to carry actually is -- which Jesus says "is light". Come to Him with your burden. Don't let the enemy tempt you with self-pity, coveting, or fear. Instead, come to Jesus and gain His strength so you can hear "Well done! Good. Faithful. Servant". In the episode, I give practical outworkings of all of this and I hope it's an episode that will give you a pep in your step and a zing of motivation to do what God is asking of you in your relationship with Him, in your relationship with your spouse and those entrusted to your care. Love and Blessings, Belah /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/35579865

472-There's Value and Hope in Your Mistakes 02/28/2025

472-There's Value and Hope in Your Mistakes Do you hate making mistakes? If you’re anything like me, you probably hold yourself to really high standards. If you’re a Jesus follower, you’re actually called to be perfect as He is perfect. But because you're not Jesus, you will fail. So, what happens when you mess up? Do you feel like a failure, try to run away, numb the pain, isolate, ignore, do some negative/sinful addiction (porn/drinking/eating...) just to stop feeling the terrible failure-feelings? The problem is, even though we know we’re saved by His sacrifice, we often still struggle with shame and guilt for our mistakes. But here’s the truth: understanding mistakes the right way can change how we view them, how we can grow from them and how they make us feel when they inevitably will happen. Mistakes generally fall into three categories: Mistake: Rebellion– When mistakes become a pattern of intentional sin consistently. This requires a lot of focus and all the advice given in #2, below. Mistake: Sin – When we go against God’s Word, we need to humbly own, repent and turn back to Him. AND from that, we get to be washed by His amazing sacrifice. There may need to be actions taken to repair the situation of others involved or you need to find healing for yourself so these sins won't happen again. But because of Jesus, the actual guilt has now been paid for by the only one who can pay for sin -- someone sinless -- Jesus. So you no longer need to take the punishment of the shame/guilty feelings anymore. Action does need to happen to rectify the situation, and let any negative feelings motivate you to put the structure, healing process, boundaries, people, community, in place to walk in freedom and righteousness. Mistake: Wisdom – These are simply errors in judgment, strategy or approach. It's essentially making a mistake in walking out wisdom. A lot of times we know better and we can't seem to get ourselves to do the wise thing every time. It's not an outright sin, as clarified Biblically. It just was kinda dumb (yeah, I know the feeling well.) Or you realized later how you made someone else feel and realized you did the wrong thing. Or maybe you didn't so something as perfectly as you expect of yourself and you feel ashamed. Even though maybe it wasn't capital S, "Sin", it can make you feel just as failure-like as if you DID something horrible. As if you ARE something horrible. The sad part is, sometimes that failure-feeling can make us want to run so bad that we metaphorically run and actually do something horrible (an real Sin: porn, addiction, rage... fill-in-the-blank SIN). But what if we didn't HAVE TO strive to achieve in perfection? What if we didn't HAVE TO strive to meet our incredibly high (non-sin) standards OR feel like a failure? And our Sin standards don't change. The solution? Well, my solution is this... instead of feeling like a failure, aim to be 80% on point in the Wisdom Category. That way, you’ll stay motivated and keep improving in living out wisdom without getting stuck in discouragement/feeling-like-a-failure. You'll get A LOT farther this way in every area of life than you would being "perfect" for a while then super discouraged (maybe even dropping into some Sin) and on and on the cycle goes. And sadly... often people just get so tired and give up and accept hopelessness. Here's the plan regarding mistakes: Keep high standards on righteousness issues, try hard to meet them---lean on Jesus for His perfection and sacrifice when we Sin. Have high standards on Wisdom things, but when we make mistakes be really happy if we aren't making that mistake 80% of the time. When you handle mistakes in the right way, they actually help you move forward instead of holding you back. I dive deeper into this in today’s episode, and I think you’ll find it really encouraging—because if you’re anything like me, you’ve made plenty of mistakes. And the good news? God has so much hope for you, and every single mistake has value. /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/35484045

471-Guiding The Next Generation Into Beautiful Marriages With Biblical Truth (Re-Release) 02/21/2025

471-Guiding The Next Generation Into Beautiful Marriages With Biblical Truth (Re-Release) Here at Delight Your Marriage, we’ve seen so many marriages transformed by God’s grace—couples who never thought they could feel close again, now thriving in ways they never imagined. But here’s the thing… what if we could help the next generation BEFORE they get married? What if they had the tools and the wisdom now, so they don’t have to struggle the way so many of us did? Setting the Example of a Beautiful Marriage Before we can guide the next generation, we need to make sure our own marriages are solid. Let’s be real—kids don’t just listen to what we say, they watch what we do. If they see love, respect, and joy in our marriages, they’ll want that for themselves. But if they see stress, distance, and unhappiness, they’re going to wonder if marriage is even worth it. So, if your marriage needs some healing, that’s the best place to start. Don’t wait. Your marriage is your greatest testimony to your kids. The World Is Confusing—We Need to Speak Up First The world is LOUD when it comes to relationships, identity, and marriage. If we’re not having these conversations with our kids early and often, they’re going to learn from someone else… and that’s usually not going to be a source of truth. Here are a few key things we need to be talking about: 1. Helping Them Know Their Identity in Christ We live in a world that tells kids they need to “find themselves” by looking inward. But that leads to so much confusion! They need to know—without a doubt—that God made them exactly as they are, on purpose. We have to be proactive in these conversations, helping them stand firm in their identity before the world really tries to confuse them. 2. What Marriage Is REALLY About Marriage isn’t just about being happy—it’s about fulfilling God’s purpose for your life together. So many people go into marriage with unrealistic expectations and get hurt because they didn’t know what to look for in a spouse. Let’s help our kids understand the beauty and purpose of marriage before they start dating, so they can make wise choices! 3. Setting Healthy Boundaries in Dating Our kids are bombarded with messages that say, “Do whatever feels good,” but that’s not wisdom! We need to help them understand that sex is a GIFT—but it’s meant for marriage. That doesn’t just mean telling them, “Don’t do this, don’t do that.” It means giving them the tools and the why behind making those choices. When they understand the wisdom behind God’s design, it makes it so much easier to live it out. Practical Help for Young Adults Navigating Dating One of the hardest things for young people is knowing how to date wisely. That’s why we created our Pre-Dating Workbook and Video Course! It’s packed with a clear vision for a God-honoring life and marriage, the four stages of pursuing a spouse (and the mistakes to avoid!), practical skills for meeting and discerning a future spouse, guidance on setting healthy emotional and physical boundaries, and more. If you have a son, daughter, niece, nephew, or someone in your life who is dating or thinking about it soon, this resource is for them! Check it out at delightyourmarriage.com/dating Providing Joy and Wisdom in Your Own Home The key to influencing the next generation is NOT about forcing rules on them—it’s about showing them something better. Jesus attracted people to Him because He was full of joy and truth. That’s how we need to be! If we want our kids to listen to us, we need to be a source of joy, truth, wisdom, and peace in their lives. Equipping the Next Generation for Stronger Marriages We can’t sit back and hope our kids figure it out on their own. They need us to guide them, to give them resources, and to speak truth in love. If you feel a stirring in your heart, take action. Strengthen your own marriage as a testimony to them, start having open, honest conversations about love, identity, and marriage, equip them with practical tools like our Pre-Dating Workbook and Course. Let’s raise up a generation that is confident in who they are, wise in how they date, and strong in their marriages. And most of all—let’s be praying for our kids. This is a battle, but God is greater. Thank you for being part of this. We’re in it together! Love, Belah & Team /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/35385405

470-Awaken Wives to Pleasure with Gary Thomas, Juli Slattery, Belah Rose & Debra Fileta 02/14/2025

470-Awaken Wives to Pleasure with Gary Thomas, Juli Slattery, Belah Rose & Debra Fileta I recently had the incredible opportunity to be a guest on Gary Thomas’ podcast. If you’ve been around Delight Your Marriage for a while, you know what a dear friend Gary has been to this ministry. Not only is he a best-selling author and speaker, but he’s also been so generous in inviting us to share on his platform in the past. And this time? I got to be part of a panel alongside two truly amazing women: Juli Slattery—President and Co-Founder of Authentic Intimacy and author of several life-changing books, including God, Sex, & Your Marriage and Rethinking Sexuality. Debra Fileta—Creator of the #1 faith-based relationship advice blog TrueLoveDates.com and author of True Love Dates: Your Indispensable Guide to Finding the Love of Your Life and Married Sex: A Christian Couple’s Guide to Reimagining Your Love (among many others). We came together for a powerful discussion about helping wives awaken to intimate pleasure—such an essential and often overlooked topic. The wisdom and insights from these women were just incredible, and I cannot wait for you to hear this conversation. Here were some key takeaways from our panel discussion: The Challenge of Awakening Sexual Fulfillment For so many women, the journey toward enjoying sex in marriage isn’t a simple switch—it’s a process. If you've spent years saying "no"—whether because of purity culture, past wounds, or just never learning that sex is a gift—it makes sense that "yes" doesn’t come easily. And you are not alone in this! How Husbands Can Help Their Wives Awaken to Pleasure Men, you’ve likely never been discipled in how to help your wife step into her own sexual enjoyment. Many husbands enter marriage assuming their wife will naturally embrace sex, but the reality is, she may feel lost, hesitant, or even afraid. This is where your role as her safe place matters deeply. Here are some questions that Debra suggested as conversation starters on sex: What’s something you're looking forward to in our sex life? What’s something that makes you nervous or unsure? What beliefs about sex do you want to hold onto, and what do you want to let go of? Overcoming the Weight of Purity Culture Many women who "did everything right" and waited for marriage still find themselves struggling. Why? Because purity culture often framed sex as something to avoid, not as a gift to embrace. As Juli Slattery puts it, "Just because I waited, doesn’t mean I know how to start." That’s the truth. And if this is you, grace upon grace, my friend. Sexual wholeness isn’t about following a list of dos and don’ts. It’s about stepping into the fullness of what God has given and allowing Him to reframe any distorted views we carry. The Power of Emotional & Spiritual Connection Debra Fileta says, "What you do above the sheets paves the way for what happens under the sheets." I could not agree more. Emotional and spiritual safety fuels physical intimacy. Husbands, if your wife doesn’t feel safe, known, and whole-heartedly cherished, her body won’t naturally respond to you with desire. So, before you think about sex, think about: Playfulness in everyday life (it builds intimacy!) How you affirm and admire her body How well she feels known and cherished by you It’s Not About You, It’s About Her A massive shift for many husbands is realizing that sex in marriage isn’t just about "getting my needs met." If your wife doesn’t feel safe, it’s no wonder intimacy feels like a duty rather than a desire. You have an opportunity to disciple your heart in a new way. Instead of seeing your wife as the "acceptable outlet" for your sexual needs, ask: "How can I be the safest place for her to enjoy intimacy?" When she feels safe, she will want to engage. Not out of obligation, but because she feels free to. How to Move Toward More Desire in Marriage Wives, rather than wondering and praying, "Why am I broken?" for not wanting intimacy, instead ask, "How can I cultivate a desire for intimacy?" Some ideas: Non-sexual sensual touch with no pressure Playfulness in your daily life (This is huge!) Embracing a "turning a dial" rather than "flipping a switch" approach to intimacy Addressing Past Trauma & Emotional Wounds Even in strong marriages, past sexual trauma or unhealthy conditioning can affect intimacy. And let’s be real: just having a great marriage doesn’t mean sex will be effortless. For some, the body’s response to past wounds will still show up. That’s okay. It’s part of the journey. Healing takes time, patience, and sometimes outside help. If this is part of your story, give yourself permission to process what’s needed. The Role of Faith & Hope in Sexual Fulfillment God is a God of hope. If your marriage has felt disconnected, there is hope. If you’ve never truly enjoyed sexual pleasure, there is hope. Your story isn’t over. Pursue wholeness—emotionally, spiritually, and physically—and trust that intimacy can be more fulfilling than you ever imagined. Final Thoughts Husbands: Emotional and spiritual intimacy first, pleasure follows. Wives: You are not broken. Your pleasure matters. Both: Intimacy is a journey, not a destination. Keep taking steps, and trust that God is working in it all. Friend, you are not alone. Your marriage can grow, your desire can awaken, and your intimacy can thrive. Keep leaning in, keep growing, and keep trusting that God has more for you than you even realize. Be blessed! Love, Belah & Team /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/35290655

469-How Her Love Changed Her Husband: Interview with Amy 02/07/2025

469-How Her Love Changed Her Husband: Interview with Amy At Delight Your Marriage, we have the incredible privilege of witnessing God’s transformative power in marriages every day. Today, we are beyond honored to share Amy’s story—a testimony of healing, restoration, and redemption. How a Podcast Sparked a Transformation in Amy’s Marriage Amy first discovered our ministry through the podcast, and in one particular episode, she felt deeply convicted about her role as a wife from a biblical principles perspective. As she listened, one question struck her to the core: “When we stand before Jesus, will we be able to say that we loved our husbands well, or will we have a list of excuses?” That moment of conviction was a pivotal turning point and led Amy to take a hard look at the patterns in her marriage. Breaking the Cycle of Hurt and Rejection Amy realized her marriage was trapped in an exhausting cycle of hurt and rejection. When her husband expressed frustration or hurt, she would respond by shutting down and shutting him out—including the area of physical intimacy. This rejection only deepened his pain, which in turn caused more outbursts, pushing them further apart. Round and round they went. Amy knew something had to change. Seeking Help: A Life-Changing Clarity Call That’s when she reached out and scheduled a Clarity Call, where she was introduced to the heart of our coaching approach. Through the program, she came to a powerful realization: she had been so focused on her pain that she hadn’t stopped to consider what loving him well actually looked like. She learned that, regardless of her husband's actions, she was responsible for her own mindset and behaviors. This mindset shift was the beginning of a profound transformation. Embracing Gratitude Practice, Letting Her Husband Lead, and Aligning Family Dynamics Her first big shift? Gratitude. Instead of seeing her husband’s contributions—like fixing things around the house or maintaining their cars—as expectations, she began to recognize them as gifts. This simple but profound change softened her heart. She also felt convicted about how she had unknowingly taken control of their marriage and family decisions. Deep down, she wanted him to lead, but she had been the one steering the ship. So, she changed course. Through personal growth, she learned to step back and allow him to take his God-given role as the leader in their home. And little by little, things changed. The Power of Forgiveness and Apology As Amy continued to grow, she felt convicted about her past actions. She humbled herself and apologized to her husband for ways she had contributed to their struggles. This act of forgiveness and vulnerability created space for genuine healing. Over time, she witnessed a shift—not just in herself, but in her husband and their marriage as a whole. The relationship healing was undeniable. We were so moved by what she shared with us: “The Lord specializes in restoration and redeeming what is broken and lost.” A Testament to God’s Restoration and Redemption Today, Amy’s marriage looks entirely different. The patterns of hurt and rejection have been replaced by love, intimacy, and a renewed sense of partnership. Praise God! God is absolutely still in the business of restoration and redemption, and we are so honored to witness His work in marriages like Amy’s. Let her story be a reminder that God redeems, he restores, and He can change things. Be blessed! Love, Belah & Team /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/35199875

468-Love, Faith, & the Joy of Discovery: Interview with Nathan Rittenhouse 01/30/2025

468-Love, Faith, & the Joy of Discovery: Interview with Nathan Rittenhouse I have been a long time fan of Nathan Rittenhouse and his work at Thinking Out Loud Together and today, I had the incredible privilege of sitting down with Nathan Rittenhouse for our podcast! Nathan is a speaker, apologist, and co-founder of Thinking Out Loud Together. Our conversation today was filled with rich insights about intimacy, humility, integrity, and the way marriage fits into God's grand design. I truly can’t wait for you to hear it! There’s so much to unpack, but here are some of the biggest takeaways from our conversation: The Bigger Purpose of Marriage: Building a Legacy That Lasts Nathan shared how his perspective on marriage has been deeply shaped by the generations of faithful, steady relationships in his family. He reminded us that marriage isn't just about two people—it impacts generations. "What will my descendants 200 years from now say about the type of life I lived?" he asked. This long-term vision is something I would encourage every reader and listener to think about. We often get so caught up in the day-to-day struggles of marriage, but when we zoom out, we see that every choice we make—every act of love, every moment of kindness, every decision to honor our spouse—ripples out for generations. What an incredible reason to be intentional about how we love, respect, and serve in our marriages! Intimacy as Worship: God’s Design for Physical and Emotional Connection One of the most powerful themes we explored was how intimacy—yes, physical intimacy—can actually be an act of worship. Nathan pointed out that God designed the physical world—including our bodies—as good. And when we engage in intimacy within God’s design, it’s not just a physical act—it’s a deeply spiritual one. It’s an opportunity to delight in God’s creation, to experience His love, and to reflect His heart. Instead of something to be endured or achieved, it becomes something to celebrate—a way to glorify the Lord. Sexuality & Integrity: Practicing Spiritual Discipline in Private Nathan emphasized that our true selves are revealed in private moments. He highlighted Jesus’ words in Matthew 6, where He speaks about the Father rewarding what is done in secret. And that’s so important when it comes to things like purity, faithfulness, and battling temptations like pornography. True integrity means being the same person in private that we present in public. Or as Nathan said, “Preach what you practice”, not just practice what you preach, but actually live with such integrity that your life naturally becomes the message. The Power of Male Friendships: Emotional Support & Community for Men Nathan and I also talked about something that’s so often overlooked: the power of godly male friendships. He pointed out that a lot of men struggling in their marriages—whether it’s loneliness, unmet expectations, or just feeling stuck—often lack deep, strong friendships with other men. And part of the problem is that our culture has sexualized everything- including strong, male friendships- making it difficult for men to form those healthy, meaningful bonds. But here’s the thing: God designed men to need other men in their lives. Just like women thrive when they have strong female friendships, men need brothers—not just surface-level friendships, but real, deep, iron-sharpening-iron relationships. Christian Hope in Marriage: Finding Strength in God’s Design We also discussed that unity in marriage is a byproduct of a shared focus on Christ. Unity in marriage isn’t found by fixing our eyes on each other—it’s found by fixing our eyes on Christ. When we try to make our spouse the center of our world, things get out of balance. But when we prioritize our relationship with God, everything else—including our marriages—falls into its rightful place. Encouragement for Those Struggling: Finding Strength in God’s Love And finally, for those feeling discouraged—whether it’s low intimacy, unmet expectations, or loneliness—Nathan left us with this powerful reminder: Our ultimate satisfaction must be in Christ. Marriage is a gift. But it was never meant to replace our deepest need—to be fulfilled in God’s love. If you’re struggling right now, know this: God sees you. He loves you. And He is the one who fills the deepest places of your heart. Thank you again, Nathan, for this incredible conversation, for your joy in the Lord, and the deep, valuable insights you’ve shared with us! This conversation was truly such a gift. And to you, dear listener and dear reader- may this conversation bless you, inspire you, and remind you of how deeply the Lord loves you. Blessings, Belah & Team PS - Want to hear more from Nathan? Check out his podcast, Together Out Loud , and the Thinking Out Loud Together website for more. https://toltogether.com/ PPS - If the idea of a family with no drama seems like a far off dream, or the thought of your private life being revealed in public brings thoughts of shame and hopelessness, we want you to know… there is hope. Give us a call: PPPS - Here is a quote from a recent graduate: “We were planning on how to keep a family together while breaking our family up - We were at the end of ourselves and decided it was time to give up and go our separate ways… I have grown in patience, perspective, my faith and connection with God, my understanding of my husband, and peace. I have learned how to build my marriage. Building it is now a journey and no longer an intense, overwhelming mission impossible.” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/35083490

467-Knowing His Love: Growing in Faith in the Father's Kindness (Re-Release) 01/24/2025

467-Knowing His Love: Growing in Faith in the Father's Kindness (Re-Release) This episode is a Re-Release, formerly titled: If You Only Knew His Love We hope it blesses you now as it blessed you then! ---------------------------------------------------------------- When I look back on my life—when I see what is currently unseen—when I see Jesus face to face—when all has been revealed… I am convinced I will be BLOWN AWAY by the love I never realized He truly had for me. God’s Care for Every Living Thing The Bible says, "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them." (Matthew 6:26) Yesterday, I was at the park, watching birds flitting around, this way and that. And yet, the God of the universe cares for them. So much so, He FEEDS the birds! If He cares so deeply for the birds, how much more does He care for you and me? God Is Intimately Involved in Your Life He is feeding you. He is clothing you. He is providing far more than you may realize. And He is intimately aware of your life and what you’re going through. In both the joys and the suffering of life, God remains good. There is so much we cannot see, and yet He is in control. Even in suffering, His purposes are higher than ours, and His plans are always good. He allows suffering for His reasons, only He can see. Trusting God Through Pain and Suffering Suffering is hard. It hurts. Deeply. But when we trust that every good gift in our lives comes from Him, it changes how we endure the hard times. Instead of despair, we can face suffering with peace, joy, and contentment. This shift allows us to fulfill at least part of the purpose God has for our pain. God Cares About Your Pain Make no mistake—God sees your suffering. He knows your struggles, whether they are rejection, loneliness, or unmet needs in your closest relationships. God cares about the pain in your marriage. He cares about the lack of intimacy, warmth, or connection. He sees the ache in your soul. And He cares. His Goodness Never Fails Even in the hardest moments, God is good. He loves you so much that He’s willing to risk you turning away from Him because He has a bigger plan for your life. As Isaiah 55:9 reminds us, “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” We don’t have to understand His reasons. But we are called to trust His goodness. Every Good Gift Is From God If God feeds the birds, how much more is He doing for us every day? He makes each breath happen and every movement possible. Every smile from your child, every sunset you see, every heartbeat you experience—these are His gifts. He knit you together in your mother’s womb, and He continues to sustain you every moment of every day. He is still designing, directing, and causing all these things to go well for us. When we take the time to notice, we see His hand in everything good. Even in suffering, when something breaks, it reminds us of all the days He allowed it to thrive. Soak in the Truth of His Love If we truly understood His love, if we only soaked in the truth of His love, we would trust Him more easily, even in the midst of pain. If we only knew His love… If we only knew His love… If we only knew His love… May you know the love of Christ today. And may I know it, too. Love, Belah & Team PS - If you would like help with your marriage, we invite you to schedule a free Clarity Call with our advisor. This call allows us to help you evaluate where you are in your marriage, and whether or not we are a good fit for you. Click here to schedule a free call: /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/34999260

466-Dasha Had Lost Hope in Her Marriage, Now it’s Full of Fun! 01/17/2025

466-Dasha Had Lost Hope in Her Marriage, Now it’s Full of Fun! We are so honored to share Dasha's incredible transformation story with you today! If you’re looking for hope for your own relationship, Dasha’s journey might be just what you need to hear today. Dasha's Marriage Story Dasha came into her second marriage with a guarded heart, carrying pain from her previous relationship. It wasn't easy; the beginning of this new chapter was rocky. She felt disconnected and had no desire for her husband. At one point, she even told him he could leave if he was unhappy. Her Husband's Transformation But instead of walking away, her husband chose a different path. He joined Masculinity Reclaimed, Delight Your Marriage’s program for men, designed to inspire personal growth and transformation. Through this program, he was able to learn the differences between men and women and how to fully love his wife in a way that she would receive love. He began implementing what he had learned in his marriage and Dasha began noticing the changes in their home and in their marriage. At first, Dasha was skeptical. She had seen temporary changes before, and they’d tried other methods, like counseling. But as Dasha put it, those methods “revealed” problems—they didn’t heal them. This time, something was different. The changes in her husband weren’t just surface-level; they were real, lasting, and kept getting better. For the first time, Dasha began to feel emotionally safe. The walls she had built around her heart started to come down. She felt connected, relaxed, and fully free to be herself with her husband. When she realized these changes weren’t going away, Dasha decided to take her own step of faith and bravery. She joined the Delighted Wife program to do her part in their journey. Dasha's Marriage Transformation Through the program, Dasha found the healing she had been longing for. By embracing gratitude, forgiveness, and the biblical principles we teach, she experienced transformation—not just in her marriage but in her own heart. She connected with other women who are on the same journey as her and now has a support system that is cheering her on and encouraging her. She learned how to open up her heart, though she was afraid it might bring hurt, she found that it brought healing. Today, she describes her marriage as not just connected, but fun! And the sweetest part? Her son gets a front-row seat to a joyful, loving, and laughter-filled home. A Marriage (and Home) Full of Fun We are so proud of Dasha for her courage, vulnerability, and willingness to embrace the process. Her story is a beautiful reminder that no matter how your marriage starts, you can change where it’s going. It is possible to have a marriage that’s stress-free, emotionally safe, deeply connected, and full of fun. We’re rooting for you and cheering you on every step of the way! With love, Belah & Team PS - If you are looking for this type of change in your marriage, we invite you to make a Clarity Call and learn more about the programs we have for men and women: PPS - Here is a testimonial from (another) recent graduate of the Delighted Wife program: “My husband and I were at the brink of complete and utter separation. There was anger, yelling, and volatile behavior. We were not even sleeping in the same bed or the same room... Through the program, I realized how much healing needed to take place in my own heart. I’ve learned to see my husband through God’s eyes and to love him with all of his strengths and weaknesses. The forgiveness [module] helped me release past hurts, and I now truly feel loved.” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/34901085

465-Wives, Here is How To Trust Your Husband Again 01/10/2025

465-Wives, Here is How To Trust Your Husband Again Trust is an essential part of the foundation in your marriage, but what happens when that foundation cracks—or even shatters? Maybe you’ve been hurt by the person you thought would always protect your heart. Perhaps betrayal, harsh words, or neglect have left you questioning everything. Can trust ever be rebuilt? Should you even try? If you’ve found yourself asking these questions, you’re not alone. Broken trust can feel overwhelming, leaving you guarded, uncertain, and even hopeless. But this doesn’t have to be the end of your story. There is hope for healing, even in the deepest wounds. Wives, we know that you have every reason to not trust your husband again: You might get hurt again. Even if your husband is making changes, doubts linger. What if he goes back to his old ways? What if he’s only changing to get something from me? Emotional wounds take time to heal. Maybe arguments, harsh words, or emotional distance have left you wondering: If I trust him again, will the hurt just continue? [Dear wife, please know this is in reference to emotional hurt. If physical abuse is part of your story, your safety must come first. God’s heart breaks for your pain, and He wants you to be safe. Please seek help from trusted organizations or individuals who can support you. He has been Untrustworthy in the Past Maybe your husband has broken your trust—whether it’s with finances, responsibilities, or even his faithfulness. Perhaps he’s been judgmental, leaving you feeling small and unseen. Or maybe his words have torn you down so often that you’ve built a wall to protect your heart. Your feelings are valid. The wounds are real, and they cut deep. But alongside these fears, could it also be worth asking: Are there unmet needs—on both sides—that are contributing to the pain? Here is what we want to make sure all of our readers know: Wives & Husbands need different things to thrive in a marriage. Wives need to feel safe, known, and whole-heartedly cherished. This isn’t just about physical safety; it’s emotional too. You need to feel that your thoughts, feelings, and dreams can be shared without fear of criticism or rejection. When this safety is missing, it’s hard to open your heart. I wrote the above reasons why not to trust your husband or fears you might have… Because I understand what you’re going through at least to some degree. I have the privilege of walking alongside women who have “been there”. It’s a painful place to live: guarded, in fear, lonely… wounded. I hear your pain. I would love to speak with you in this episode and just see if by the end you are encouraged and even (prayerfully) gain hope that God could do a work in you. "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him" Romans 15:13 We do serve a God that loves you, brings healing, and gives you a reason for hope. He really loves you. He really does bring hope. We love you and are praying for you. Belah PS - If you want to start making this change in your marriage but don’t know how, we would love to chat with you: PPS - Here is a testimonial from a recent graduate: "Before DYM there was a lot of tension and stress in our marriage and disconnect. My husband had affairs, and these were replayed constantly in my head even though one of them occurred 25 years ago. I did not trust him and had not forgiven him… After going through the program, the stress is gone, and replaying the affairs in my head is pretty much gone… We are both so much happier in our marriage! I have also started back on my spiritual journey with God that I have been away from for many years." /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/34813000

464-New Year Disciplines for Confidence and Faith 01/03/2025

464-New Year Disciplines for Confidence and Faith How do you plan to step into this year with confidence and faith? The new year often brings a whirlwind of resolutions and lofty goals. Perhaps you’ve felt that familiar pull—“I’m going to do more of this,” “I’ll cut back on that,” or “This year, I’ll completely turn things around.” But maybe that’s not where you are right now. Maybe, instead of a burst of motivation, you feel unmotivated, stuck, or unsure. What if what you’re missing isn’t motivation, but faith? Faith that God is with you. Faith that He has a plan. Faith that, in Him, you can walk with a new sense of purpose. Faith is confidence. And if you feel like you’re lacking confidence, let this be an invitation to lean into Him. Here are a few ways to grow in confidence this year—because as your confidence in God grows, so does your faith. 1. Make Time for Intentional Moments with the Lord Husbands, as spiritual leaders of your home, you’re called to guide—not perfectly, but faithfully. Start small. Read a Bible verse to your children before bed, or take a moment to pray with your family. When you open your Bible, ask God to speak to your heart: “Lord, what do You want me to learn? Reveal Yourself to me.” These simple steps will deepen your relationship with God, building faith and intimacy with Him. 2. Embrace Risks with Courage Wives, stepping into the unknown—whether in your marriage or personal growth—can feel daunting. But just as thrill-seekers find exhilaration in challenges like skydiving or bungee jumping, there’s a unique joy in stepping out in faith, even in intimate parts of your marriage. Confidence begins with trust—both in God and in the one He’s placed by your side. 3. Be Useful for God’s Kingdom In Revelation 3, we’re reminded that God desires us to be useful—not lukewarm. Whether it’s the hot water for cleansing or cold water for refreshing, each has purpose. Empty nesters, your wisdom and experience are invaluable. There’s a generation that needs your guidance and your prayers. Step boldly into the role God has for you. 4. Trust in His Faithfulness No matter what you face, trust that God is working for your good. His love is steadfast, His discipline is kind, and His plans are perfect. Even in moments of waiting or trial, you can have confidence that He will see you through. 5. Look to Biblical Role Models Scripture is filled with examples of faith under pressure. Think of Mordecai’s courage, Esther’s boldness, Peter’s willingness to step out onto the waves, and Paul’s unwavering hope even in chains. Their lives remind us that faith often requires action—and that God uses those who trust Him to do extraordinary things. This year, don’t wait for the perfect moment to begin. Take a step, even a small one, toward the place you feel God is calling you. A moving ship is easier to steer than one that’s standing still. We’re here for you, cheering you on and praying for God to fill you with confidence—confidence that will not only transform your life but ripple out to bless your family, your community, and the Kingdom. God delights in you. Let this truth guide you as you step boldly into what He has prepared for you this year. God bless you! Love, Belah & Team PS - If you want to grow in discipleship and transform your relationship with God (and in turn your marriage), we would love to chat with you: delightym.com/cc PPS - Here is a testimonial from a recent graduate: "I have grown in my time with God, my intense desire to understand the Word and trust God. I have also grown in my openness and vulnerability with my wife, I was honestly intimidated by having open conversations with her about how I felt." /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/34715585

463-Reflect and Refocus: Renewed Vision for 2025 12/27/2024

463-Reflect and Refocus: Renewed Vision for 2025 How do you step into a new year with purpose? Life can feel like a constant rush, can’t it? Maybe you’re juggling tasks right now, trying to get it all done before the clock strikes midnight on December 31st. But as we prepare to turn the page on this year, what if we paused? What if we took a moment to breathe deeply, to reflect, and to realign with what truly matters? Believe it or not, you have done a lot of good this past year. Yes, there may be places where you have slipped up or there were hard lessons to learn, but look at the good. And look at the good God has done in you. God loves you. He really loves you. He delights in you! Take a moment to really let that sink in. God delights in you. As we step into the new year, I invite you to hold on to that truth. So, how can you make the new year something that will honor Him and help you grow? Here are 10 things we suggest: 1. Continue to take time to reflect on this past year Where did you see God’s hand in your life and marriage? Even in the hard moments, what growth or blessings came out of them? By reflecting, you not only honor what God has done but also prepare your heart to hear what He might want to do next. 2. Start your mornings with Purpose Your mornings set the tone for the entire day. Carve out time to meet with God—reading Scripture, praying, or journaling your thoughts and goals. It doesn’t need to be lengthy or perfect, just consistent. A morning routine focused on Him can help you anchor your day in peace, purpose, and His perspective, rather than the perspective of the world. 3. Prioritize reading Scripture from a physical Bible There’s something grounding about holding a physical Bible in your hands. It slows you down, removes distractions, and helps you focus on God’s Word. His truth brings clarity and wisdom, especially as you make decisions and set goals for the year. 4. Pace Yourself It’s tempting to set ambitious goals for January, but remember—life is a marathon, not a sprint. Instead of overwhelming yourself, focus on what’s realistic. Break down your goals by quarter. What’s most important for the first three months? Then build from there. 5. Aim for 80 Perfection is not only unattainable but also draining. Instead of striving for flawless execution, aim for steady, faithful progress. Aiming for 80% will get you much farther than burning out in pursuit of an impossible ideal. 6. Create a Life Vision If you haven’t done this in our program yet, a Life Vision is about looking at the bigger picture. Who is God calling you to be? What kind of legacy do you want to leave? Your Life Vision can guide your daily decisions, helping you prioritize what truly matters over what feels urgent. 7. Take Inventory of Your Relationship with your Spouse this past year Your marriage is one of the most significant relationships God has entrusted to you. How was your connection this year? Are there areas where you want to grow closer—spiritually, emotionally, or physically? Taking inventory helps you identify what’s working and where you’d like to improve in the coming year. 8. Remember to Defend Against the Enemy’s discouragement Discouragement is one of the Enemy’s favorite tools to derail us. Be alert to his lies and counter them with God’s truth. Surround yourself with Scripture and people who remind you of your worth and God’s plans for your life. Remember, “Greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world” (1 John 4:4). 9. Fight the Battle of Comparison Comparison can steal your joy and distract you from God’s unique calling for your life. Just as the eye and the foot serve different purposes in the body, we each have our roles in His plan. Focus on what He’s calling you to do, not what others are doing. 10. Ask yourself, “What does God want me to focus on?” At the heart of all your planning and reflection, this is the most important question. Seek His wisdom and guidance as you set your intentions for the year. He knows the plans He has for you (Jeremiah 29:11), and they are good. Through it all, stay rooted in God’s eternal perspective. Fix your heart on Christ, let His Word transform you, and step into the good works He’s prepared for you. As we enter this new year, know that we’re here for you. Whether it’s helping you grow in your marriage or deepen your walk with Christ, we’re rooting for you and we cannot wait to see what God has in store for you. God bless you! Love, Belah & Team /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/34632475

462-Fall in LIKE with Your Spouse Again 12/20/2024

462-Fall in LIKE with Your Spouse Again Do you remember what it was like falling in “like” with your spouse? What was it that originally drew you to them? Maybe it was their humor, kindness, or how they made you feel seen and appreciated. Over time, it's easy for that “like” to fade. Instead, criticism, judgment, or even indifference creeps in. But imagine being in your spouse’s shoes—everything they say and do, examined under a magnifying glass, critiqued and picked apart. That kind of scrutiny doesn’t help them thrive. And nothing wounds deeper than feeling that the person you chose, the one closest to you, doesn’t actually like you. What if, instead, you accepted their weaknesses and quirks? After all, they have them, and so do you. What if you chose to see their strengths instead? What if you noticed what they’re doing right and spoke it out loud? I want to encourage you to take that step. Scripture is clear about encouragement and loving our neighbors: “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NIV) “Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” Matthew 22:37-39 (NIV) “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves” Philippians 2:3 (NIV) “Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.” Romans 12:10 (ESV) “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” Ephesians 4:2 (NIV) Your spouse needs to know that you see the good in them. That you still like them. That you’re rooting for them, not against them. It’s amazing what a little grace and encouragement can do to rebuild connection and joy. This Christmas week, I invite you to be gracious with your spouse. Notice the small things—their kindness, their effort, their dedication—and let them know you see it. Accept their weaknesses, support them gently, and call out the good that God has placed in them. God bless you, and from all of us here at Delight Your Marriage, Merry Christmas! Love, Belah & Team PS - If you want to learn more about how to love your closest neighbor well, we would love to chat with you. Click the link to schedule a FREE Clarity Call: PPS - The third installment of our Pre-Marriage series, the Pre-Wedding Workbook, is available now! We hope this book blesses you and sets you on the path to a peaceful, playful, passionate, and purposeful marriage! Check it out here: /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/34553225

461-Isolation Wasn't the Answer that Healed Him. Pat's Transformation Story 12/13/2024

460-A Wife's Holy Privilege 12/04/2024

460-A Wife's Holy Privilege How do you prioritize your life? This episode is for our lovely wives in the audience. Dear wives, life can feel like a never-ending whirlwind. Maybe right now you’re juggling errands, picking up your kids, or running around doing everything for everyone else. It’s easy to get caught up in all the demands, isn’t it? But let’s pause for a moment and think about what God has asked us to prioritize. When Jesus was asked about the greatest commandment, His response was crystal clear: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” Here’s something worth reflecting on—have you neglected your closest neighbor? Your husband is your closest neighbor. He’s the one God has entrusted to you. The one you’re called to love as yourself—not just love, but love in a way that truly meets his unique needs. It’s not about doing it all perfectly. It’s about leaning into curiosity and compassion. What if you remembered your husband is a brother in Christ? What if you began to discover and appreciate how God intentionally designed him—even the aspects you might not fully understand, like his sex drive? It’s all part of God’s good and purposeful plan. In this episode, we’ll explore how God designed men (all the way from the beginning to now!), why their design matters, and how to love them in a way that speaks to their heart. It’s not about fixing him or changing him but learning to support and honor the way God made him. I pray that as you listen, your perspective will shift. That you’ll see your husband with fresh eyes—eyes of grace, compassion, and discovery. Let this be a reminder to focus on loving your first neighbor well, just as God calls us to do. God bless you! Love, Belah & Team PS - If this episode resonated with you and you want to learn more about how to truly love your first neighbor well, we would love to chat with you: delightym.com/cc PPS - Mark your calendar: The Pre-Wedding Workbook is releasing December 18th on Amazon! We cannot wait to get this workbook into your hands and hope it proves to be a great blessing to you and those around you. Stay tuned! /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/34282365

459-Socially Unskilled But Now Connected: Stu’s Transformation Story 11/29/2024

458-Why Doesn't She Want Sex: Drop The Expectations 11/22/2024

458-Why Doesn't She Want Sex: Drop The Expectations Let’s set the scene- You’ve planned the perfect evening. A Friday night—date night. You and your wife are dressed to the nines. There’s a show, a fantastic dinner, and deep conversation that reconnects your hearts. But then you arrive back home… What are you hoping will happen next? Here’s the truth: that unspoken hope—your expectation—might be doing more harm than you realize. When a husband subconsciously expects intimacy, it can feel like pressure to his wife. And that pressure? It makes her withdraw. Intimacy begins to feel transactional—like something she owes you, a “reward” for good effort, rather than a mutual outpouring of love. In fact, the more you expect it, the less she’ll desire it. So, how do you break free from this pattern and draw her closer instead? Here are three key ideas: Drop the expectations & be content in your life (find true contentment in life by letting God satisfy you in many ways) Share your feelings more with your wife (She needs emotional connection in order to be open to physical intimacy) Think strategically about your marriage (You’re intentional about your career, your goals—why not your marriage?) In today’s episode, we unpack these three steps and explore how to release the pressure of expectations, discover fulfillment outside of intimacy (even when sex isn’t in the picture) [We highly recommend you checking out Ep. 417: Re-sensitize Your Pleasure for more on this topic], and create a marriage that’s full of joy, connection, and God-honoring pleasure. We believe God when he said he meant for couples to be “one flesh”. And we believe that he created intimacy to be unifying, satisfying, and connecting heart, soul, and body. We hope this episode brings a new perspective and new joy, intimacy, and connection into your marriage. God bless you! Belah & Team PS - If this episode resonates with you, we highly recommend signing up for our FREE Masculinity Reclaimed Foundations Course at . PPS - Here is a quote from a recent MRF graduate: "We were emotionally, intimately, and spiritually disconnected. We lived in the same house but didn't live together. I was angry and bitter, critical of everything, and judgmental. I hated that about myself. [Now,] My wife and I are closer than we have ever been! She has a glow. It's crazy how much we love each other. Life is fun! I can't stand to be without her. Glory to God!” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/34113276

457 - Why Doesn't She Want Sex: The Basics 11/15/2024

456-Don't Give Up (my husband joins me :)) [Re-Release] 11/08/2024

455-Honor Their Strengths & Support Their Weaknesses (Belah's husband joins!) 11/01/2024

454-Hopeless & Frustrated to Restored Legacy: Craig's Transformation Story 10/25/2024

454-Hopeless & Frustrated to Restored Legacy: Craig's Transformation Story We’re thrilled to share Craig’s story with you today. For years, Craig and his wife were stuck in a painful cycle—“You always ____,” “You never _____”—both keeping score, building walls of resentment, and matching hurt with hurt. Things seemed like they’d never change. Then, a friend from church mentioned the transformation he had experienced through Delight Your Marriage. Craig was skeptical at first, but as the months passed, he couldn’t deny the remarkable shift in his friend’s life. That’s when Craig decided to take the first step and schedule a Clarity Call. What surprised him most was that the change didn’t come from trying to fix his wife—it started with him. Within the first month, Craig embraced a new way of showing up: becoming “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.” Through his own transformation, the marriage began to heal. Today, Craig shares with joy that his children will never have to grow up in a divided home. The family tree will remain unbroken, with a straight and strong trunk—thanks to the tools, community, and growth Craig found through our program. We hope Craig’s story reminds you that change is possible. It’s possible to break free from arguments. It’s possible to experience peace and joy in your marriage. And it’s possible for God to rewrite your story in ways you never imagined. We believe in you, and we are cheering you on. Love, Belah & Team PS - If you want a change in your marriage like Craig had, with no more arguing and no more resentment, we would love to talk with you. Check out our free Clarity Call here: PPS - Check out this testimonial from (another) recent graduate: “My wife had her mind pretty much set on divorce. She said she had an upcoming meeting with an attorney when I first joined the program. My stress level was up, my appetite was pretty much nothing, and I couldn't sleep. [After MR}, I have grown spiritually, mentally, and feel more whole as a person. My wife and I have come to a place in our marriage where it used to be, like when we first got married. We are happy to be around each other again, can't wait to see each other at the end of the day, and have more connected conversations again.” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/33620447

453-Moving On from His Mistakes: Lindsay's Transformation Story 10/17/2024

452-Forgiven & Free of Resentment & Past Affairs. Jim's Transformation Story 10/11/2024

452-Forgiven & Free of Resentment & Past Affairs. Jim's Transformation Story Today’s episode is an incredible story of God‘s transformative power. From a man who started out broken and lonely, with a history he wasn’t proud of, God was able to take his little seed of faith, his little seed of hope that just maybe something could change for him, too. He decided to sign up for a free Clarity Call, and then to join our program. He went through the program once on his own. Eventually, his wife saw some changes in him and decided that she wanted to do the work to heal from their past. Ultimately, they both did the program at the same time, and praise the Lord, they are completely renewed and restored. You would not believe the description that Jim gives of their marriage today. He said that it’s the way he always dreamed marriage could be. I hope this gives you encouragement, that you too, can have a marriage rescue no matter the past. God can redeem. If you’d like our help, we’d love to help you on a free Clarity Call. Love, Belah & Team PS There IS hope, dear one! Healing is what Jesus does! Bring it to Him and ask for His touch. Our programs can help with the healing process and equip you with the tools. Jesus does the rest! Take that step of faith.... From someone who did: "Celebrating making it to 12 weeks when I thought I wouldn’t make the course at all... GOD is great! ...Loving my husband again after infidelity on both sides - never in my wildest dreams did I think it was possible to find that love again and so quickly. The peace God has bestowed upon my marriage, life, house, and children since walking through this course... I love life and am dreaming again because God has brought healing to my marriage. It’s like all the stop buttons that were pushed because I was out of alignment with God’s will in my marriage have been pushed to GO/GREEN again and I feel more aligned, more focused, and things are moving again." /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/33425137

451-How to Deal with Anxiety Biblically 10/04/2024

451-How to Deal with Anxiety Biblically Is it true? Are you sure it’s true? How often do we ask these questions when an anxious thought comes to our mind? Too often we allow ourselves to assume a thought is true and allow the anxiety to drive us to choices we don't want to make. Anxiety is fear. Stress is masked fear. And controlling or mothering behavior... yep... it's also fear. The Bible is crystal clear: Do not fear. Be anxious for nothing. If you want to break free from this snare, it starts with 1) calming your physical body 2) investigating the mental tapes playing in your mind. What anxious thoughts have you allowed to run your life? ‘I’m not good enough’ 'I'm a failure as a husband' "My husband doesn't love me" Whatever it is, I challenge you to investigate those thoughts. Get curious about your anxiety. When you work on acknowledging and understand your fears, you build the resilience needed to face them, biblically. It’s not about denying the struggle; it’s about leaning in and clarifying what is actually going on. This is a technique adapted from Byron Katie, and it is a series of questions you ask yourself. A - What mental tape am I repeating? B - Is it true? C - Am I absolutely sure it’s true? There are a couple more steps we talk through in the podcast, which I'm very excited for you to listen to! May God give you grace to walk in His abundant peace and comfort. Love, Belah and Team PS - If you want help rewriting that mental tape and want help getting rooted in the truth of Scripture and your marriage, we would love to talk to you. Please contact us at delightyourmarriage.com/cc PPS - Here is a quote from a recent graduate: “[Some of my] quick fire celebrations: -The peace God has bestowed upon my marriage, life, house, and children since walking through this course -The new refreshed hope I have in Jesus -Praying and reading my Bible and actually getting together with people who love and believe in Jesus. I was repulsed by Christians for a while but I now see value in community after doing this course. -The way I’ve grown to know what God thinks about marriage and life in general. He actually wants to make it easy and wants to help us not make us work hard or struggle like slaves for the sake of marriage. HE REALLY IS GOOD.” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/33319787

450-Where There is Breath, There is Hope: Kevin's Transformation Story 09/27/2024

450-Where There is Breath, There is Hope: Kevin's Transformation Story Have you ever felt so disconnected in your marriage that you wondered if it was worth fighting for? Kevin found himself in that very place—emotionally, spiritually, and physically distant from his wife. Harshness and criticism seemed to cloud their every interaction, leaving him discouraged and ready to give up. He felt his energy was drained and was unmotivated in many aspects of life. He took the courage to sign up and speak with Dana on a Clarity Call, he felt it gave him insights into himself and helped him discover what was at the root of their disconnection. He felt he wasn't the role model he'd want to be for his children. He had allowed his marriage to be transactional which he knew wasn't what God designed marriage to be. That's when he decided he wasn't giving his family all that he should and he signed up for the men's program. Through this journey, Kevin began to implement the daily gratitudes—a practice that sparked a profound shift in his mindset. He was encouraged through his Coaching Calls to stand firm as the spiritual leader he longed to be for his family, even amidst resistance. He finally feels he is spiritually leading his family. We are so proud of Kevin and know that the same change he saw in his marriage can happen with yours. As he shared with us, where there is breath, there is hope. We believe this podcast will encourage you that God CAN heal this marriage. He may be calling you to be the very one who does it, by changing yourself. Love, Belah & Team PS - If you are interested in a Clarity Call and speaking with one of our advisors as Kevin did, we would love to talk with you: PPS - Here a quote from a (different) recent graduate: “Some of my biggest celebrations: Our relationship, our discussions have become much more peaceful, easygoing and playful than before!... She has expressed often how she likes the changes she sees in me… I have a renewed hope that things can get better. I now have a clearer vision of my role as a husband and how things can and should be. I have grown in confidence by learning what is the path to get there. I understand my wife so much better now and realize that contrary to what I thought before, she is not broken!... One change that I think is the most telling of how the DYM program has impacted our lives: Prior to the program we had been sleeping in separate rooms for years. I am thankful to say that I am back in our marriage bed, physically, emotionally – for good now!” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/33238182

449-Cowardly Lions Aren't Sexy (Lies Undermine Courage) 09/22/2024

449-Cowardly Lions Aren't Sexy (Lies Undermine Courage) By the end of this episode, I hope you'll get this, men: Courage. Character. Restraint. What I really want to share is that if you want your wife to follow you and be turned on by you, cowardice isn't sexy... to say the least. It's true that the "righteous are as bold as a lion". If you want to grow in courage you must grow in your character. When you lie to yourself or to others, you are undermining your confidence and courage. You are the leader of your home. Whether you feel that way or not, what you do (or don't do) creates the culture. You are the first man your children ever see as a role model. You are the first husband your wife has ever had. You are their standard. If you "follow" your father, and don't realize you're a leader, you will fall into the same issues he had. But if you realize that you're a lion, you are a leader. You have the opportunity to do everything differently. It starts with looking at your character. It starts with not lying. You must work on integrating all the parts of yourself: your spirituality, sexuality, wealth, family life, etc, etc, etc. When your character is your focus and goal to increase, you become more courageous. When you can be honest with the tiny, then you can make big decisions easily. I give some embarrassing examples that I hope you can learn from (at my expense). Please know I love you and am praying for you. Blessings, Belah PS - If you’re ready to take the next step in fighting for your marriage, we want to talk with you. Please contact us at and schedule a totally free Clarity Call with us. PPS - Here is a quote from a recent graduate: Before the Masculinity Reclaimed Program: “I often felt disrespected and controlled. To a degree I felt unloved because of the lack of physical intimacy. I often felt I couldn’t be myself or express my opinion because of the disapproval I would feel when I did. There was anger and indifference growing in me. We were growing further and further apart… hopelessness was making me accept the fact that we would continue to become more and more estranged until one or both of us died.” After MR: “I have a renewed hope that things can get better. I now have a clearer vision of my role as a husband and how things can and should be. I have grown in confidence by learning what is the path to get there. I understand my wife so much better now and realize that contrary to what I thought before, she is not broken! Anxiousness about when sex will happen next is pretty much gone. Our communication is so much better: we have not had an argument since the beginning of the program. I am sharing more of myself now – my wife will not die without knowing her husband of all these years!” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/31679387

448-Embrace Your Thorn Before it Kills You 09/12/2024

448-Embrace Your Thorn Before it Kills You Consider this: you might be more like Paul than you realize. Yes, Paul—the apostle whose praises were so powerful they shook prison walls, and who found joy even in his suffering. What could you possibly have in common with him? Well, Paul had a thorn in his side. A persistent struggle that he begged God to remove. I’m willing to bet there’s a thorn in your side too—something you’ve desperately asked God to take away. Whether it’s sexual sin, pride, greed, jealousy, or anger, this thorn is your personal struggle. I am here to tell you: Embrace the thorn in your side. This might sound counterintuitive, but in your weakness, God’s strength is made perfect. The thorn is there for a reason. God has given it to you to keep you humble, to remind you that you’re not in control of everything, and to draw you closer to Him. How do folks often respond to their (God-given) thorns? Disassociate. Disown. Disregard. Disassociating yourself from these struggles—especially the deep ones like hidden addictions—can be perilous. Essentially, if you do not embrace your thorn, it is the enemy's playground to attack you in the same way again... and again... and again... to the destruction of all those you love and the reputation of the gospel that you represent to others. We are urging you, bring these struggles into the light. Seek accountability, find support, and create a plan. On the good days it's easier to make that plan and structure to support you on the hard days that you know will come... because you've embraced the thorn that is God's gift which keeps you humble. Important: Perfection isn’t required- 80% of a plan is enough to start making meaningful progress. The point is to start. Remember when you perceive the negative pattern in your history, it's time to take action so you can prevent things going downhill... for when you are weak, then you are strong. This week, I encourage you to identify your thorn (start with one, we likely all have many! I certainly do), confront it, confess it to God, repent and confess it to safe people. Then, know that He forgives you and makes a way of escape for the future so you can truly truly walk in the humility that comes through the gift of this thorn... because His grace IS sufficient for you. Love, Belah & Team PS - If you are interested in learning more about our program, maybe even getting that accountability in your life, we would love to talk to you. Check out PPS - I am excited to share with you a resource that I believe will be of value for your marital intimacy! A group of pro-marriage / intimacy experts have gotten together and are doing a sex seminar. These are folks that believe marriage is right and good but they are not necessarily Bible-believing Christians. Amongst really valuable and wise content, there will likely be perspectives represented that I don’t 100% agree with. I encourage you (as always) to seek discernment from God to gain the good insights that may be in this event and leave what may not be helpful to you. Keep eternity in mind: at the end of it all we want to hear from God “well done.” We want it to be true that we loved the spouse we were given with a servant heart and according to His Word. I hope you gain wonderful encouragement and practical ideas to love your spouse well through intimacy! Here are the links- 2024 Sex Seminar: Sex Seminar Bundle (all 5 years): PPPS - Here is a quote from a recent graduate: "After 8 years of marriage, we had both grown complacent in investing in each other… I have long struggled with pornography and I tend to be a bit of a workaholic while my wife has been at home with our kids for 15 years. It seems we took every one of those opportunities to create distance in our relationship… [Now], I'm taking ownership. This is my home. This is my marriage. She is my wife. Ours is a union blessed by God. In taking my roles as husband, father, help mate more seriously, my whole family has begun to benefit. The man's role is not to simply coexist, but to lead the marriage and family. I can make a difference in the family by leading to and with God.” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/33029642

447-Widower, Blended Family & Pastor in Pain...but God: Karl's Transformation Story 09/06/2024

447-Widower, Blended Family & Pastor in Pain...but God: Karl's Transformation Story We want to share an inspiring story about Karl, a widower who experienced profound loss when his first wife passed away in 2020. Since then, he’s rebuilt his life with a new marriage to his lovely wife Rachel and a vibrant blended family of six children. At first, their new life together seemed to be falling into place beautifully, but just nine months into their marriage, an unexpected challenge arose. Due to circumstances beyond their control, pornography was inadvertently introduced into their home through one of their children’s devices. This incident outside of their control ignited a series of conflicts, tension and bitterness. As a pastor, he realized if he lost his marriage, everything, every thing in his life was at stake. Through a series of unusual events, Karl learned of the success of Delight Your Marriage and decided to give it a try and fight for his marriage. He took our free Clarity Call and described it as a “breath of fresh air” that gave true clarity. He was able to see how not only the past few months had affected his marriage but how things from his previous marriage and the loss from 2020 were also affecting him even now. He committed to the men's program, and the transformation was remarkable. Through the tools and guidance he received, he learned to communicate more effectively and approach his relationship with a renewed sense of empathy and understanding. As Karl’s approach to their marriage shifted, Rachel’s heart began to soften. This newfound healing was put to the test when their luggage, including passports, thousands in cash, work laptop, and IDs, was stolen right before their trip to Rachel’s home country. He said this (and this is what we want for you) they leaned into each other and God during crisis, rather than being torn apart. When they used to have massive discord on something as simple as a family routine, now they have connection and healing amidst what could be described as a significant disappointment. What they've discovered through it all... they have both said: “I have my best friend back.” Be encouraged by God's miracle working power, which He can do for you too! Belah & Team /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/32945662

446-Overcome Your Own Apathy (Exhaustion or Pride?) 08/30/2024

446-Overcome Your Own Apathy (Exhaustion or Pride?) There’s a profound truth that can often be overlooked: love, in its truest form, is sustainably sacrificial. This means loving your spouse in a way that endures, even when it's challenging. If you're a spouse who is tempted towards apathy—losing hope and withdrawing—it can feel like a deep, unending chasm. This apathy might stem from various sources: exhaustion from the relentless demands of daily life, pride that blocks genuine connection, unforgiveness that creates barriers, or perhaps a combination of all these factors. Whatever the reason, it’s crucial to recognize these signs before they evolve into a dangerous pattern that jeopardizes your relationship. There may be times when your spouse’s attempts to reach out (or lack thereof) seem ineffective or even hurtful. I encourage you to see beyond the surface and engage with the deeper purpose of marriage -- to make God proud of you. Remember, you’re not loving your spouse for a specific result; you’re doing it because you love God. That love for God will sustain you when you’re not seeing the fruit of your efforts. He CAN fill us with all joy and peace, irrespective of our circumstances or the immediate outcomes of our actions. Even amidst the temptation to lose hope and become apathetic. Don't. Instead, look to the Lord. Rejoice in Him, and trust that God is a God of hope. Your perseverance is not in vain, even when it feels like you’re giving more than your fair share in loving and meeting your partner’s needs. Love, Belah & Team PS - If you are wanting to fight apathy, fight for your marriage, or just even get some clarity for your marriage... we would love to talk with you. Schedule a free Clarity Call at delightyourmarriage.com/cc. PPS - Here is a quote from a recent graduate: “My biggest celebrations have been: Forgiveness- I had no idea how much resentment I had towards my wife. There is no doubt in my mind that she felt that… I learned to not only forgive her, but look at some of those things as a strength for her… Replacing bad habits with good daily habits of first thanking God for my blessings. praying for my wife, shouting my faith statement and focusing on making my marriage the best it can be. I learned that it is all up to me. I know God is with me every step of the way, but I have to be the leader of my life and my marriage.” /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/32811207

445-Revive Your Marriage: Overcome Apathy Before It's Too Late 08/23/2024

445-Revive Your Marriage: Overcome Apathy Before It's Too Late Perhaps the most heartbreaking situations I encounter are when one spouse becomes apathetic—losing hope—and decides to "pull the plug" on the relationship. When a spouse gives up hope, apathy sets in, leading them to consider divorce, an affair, or even a secret addiction because they feel their spouse isn’t meeting their needs. I may not fully understand all the dynamics that have brought your marriage to its current state, but my hope is that you recognize the warning signs before apathy takes hold. LISTEN to your spouse’s heartcry. Don’t let them lose hope because their attempts to communicate with you have been ignored. Yes, their communication may have been ineffective—perhaps controlling, critical, or accusatory—but underneath it all, they are expressing a hurt that you are overlooking. If you ignore it long enough, they may stop hoping things will change. Tragically, this can lead to apathy and the potential destruction of your marriage. As a marriage coach who genuinely cares, I urge you: please don’t wait until apathy sets in before you start paying attention to what your spouse is trying to communicate. Even if their words make you feel like a failure, could you, just possibly, listen to the deeper message? They are crying out to be loved in the way they need to feel loved, and if you don’t respond, they may become so weary that the dangerous temptation of apathy takes hold. NOTE: If you’re the spouse who seems to be doing more than your fair share of loving and meeting your partner’s needs, know this: your reward will be great, far beyond what you might receive in this life. Don’t stop. Don’t let apathy take root in your heart. Remember, God is a God of hope, and He will fill you with hope as you trust in Him. He doesn’t want you to be hopeless. Trust in God. Love, Belah PS - If you're on the verge of losing hope and becoming apathetic about your marriage, we want to help. And if you're worried that your spouse might be feeling this way, we want to help too. Your next step is a free, "low-stakes" conversation called a Clarity Call. We'd love to hear what's going on and potentially be the lifeline that prevents disaster—God has worked miracles in situations like yours before. But it takes courage to take that first step of HOPE. Speak to a compassionate Clarity Advisor: PPS -- Here is a quote from a recent graduate: "I had grown so apathetic towards my husband that I KNEW this was very dangerous. I had built a case against him in my mind for the ways he did not appreciate me or accept me... I am a highly sensitive person with strong feelings, so to have little to no feeling towards my husband was intolerable to me. This is what drove me to DYM... A truly KEY realization I had to admit, was that I was a “bickering wife” and that I had been undermining him, disrespecting him, and deeply wounding him... I am so convicted of how it tore down my marriage, impacted my husband’s self-esteem, and definitely was negative example to our children... Once I admitted that, I was able to grow!" /episode/index/show/delightyourmarriage/id/32713732

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