7 On Sundays™
7 On Sundays™ (SOS) is the only podcast today with young people sharing their raw and real experiences with sex, relationships, and mental health. SOS co-hosts Stephanie Boye and Dr. Chez Leeby, are a dynamic combination of sex educator and family therapist. Our professional and anecdotal experience, working with thousands of young people, reveals that today's socially acceptable and normative behaviors damage young people and the culture at large. Each week, with SOS, we dig in with brave high school, college, and postgrads about the unspoken, often taboo, and alarming realities they are facing today. Young people share their raw feelings and disclose vulnerable, sometimes shocking situations around red flag relationships, assault, addiction, pornography, hookup culture, anxiety, depression, and more. What we all think is uncommon is sadly rampant across college campuses. Each 7 On Sundays™ episode is emotional, impactful, and yet, incredibly inspiring. We listen, invite insight, and offer concrete tools so our guests and listeners can experience more agency, integrity, and peace. Life is messy…Tune in to 7 On Sundays™ and hear from others who have similar stories, questions, dilemmas, and most importantly, solutions. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
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Sexual Strangulation: A Critical Conversation About The Myths, Realities and The Role of Porn -with Brian Bennett
12/22/2024
Sexual Strangulation: A Critical Conversation About The Myths, Realities and The Role of Porn -with Brian Bennett
This week, we dive deep into the critical and under-discussed topic of non-fatal strangulation with expert Brian Bennett. A retired South Carolina law enforcement veteran and police academy instructor, Brian sheds light on the alarming realities of strangulation in domestic violence, sexual contexts, and beyond. Joined by Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye, the conversation explores the physiological, psychological, and societal implications of strangulation, highlighting its role as a precursor to severe violence and the urgent need for awareness and intervention. Topics Discussed: ● The mechanics and dangers of non-fatal strangulation. ● Recognizing strangulation in domestic violence and sexual contexts. ● Long-term effects, including cognitive and physical complications. ● The need for awareness in healthcare, education, and law enforcement. ● Challenges in legislation and tracking strangulation cases. ● Resources for education and support. Resources Mentioned: ● Institute on Strangulation Prevention: . ● Nurse Joanne and Strangulation (YouTube video): A detailed explanation of why strangulation survivors need medical care. ● Strangulation Law for SC (Facebook group): Updates, resources, and discussions around non-fatal strangulation in South Carolina. Timestamps: 00:00 Trigger Warning 00:17 Coming Up In This Episode 00:57 Welcome and Guest Introduction 01:20 Expert Insights: Brian Bennett's Background 05:48 The Broader Scope of Strangulation 09:25 Signs and Symptoms of Strangulation 12:18 The Dangers of Sexual Strangulation 19:02 Long-Term Effects and Medical Complications 29:06 Raising Awareness and Training 30:46 Brian Bennett's Journey and Advocacy 34:08 The Need for Better Understanding and Conversations 40:15 The Dangers of Strangulation 40:57 Strangulation in Mixed Martial Arts 41:39 No Safe Strangulation 42:07 Personal Experiences and Misconceptions 44:43 Legislation and Legal Definitions 48:29 Strangulation as a Predictor of Violence 55:22 Medical Treatment and Awareness 59:20 Sexual Strangulation and Its Risks 01:07:21 Public Awareness and Education 01:08:24 Resources and Final Thoughts 01:13:34 Closing Statements Connect with Us: ● Website: ● Facebook: ● Instagram:
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Creating Digital Intentionalism & Cultivating Real Connections: Harrison Haynes on Mindful Technology Use
12/22/2024
Creating Digital Intentionalism & Cultivating Real Connections: Harrison Haynes on Mindful Technology Use
In this enlightening episode, we welcome Harrison Haynes back to dive into the profound impacts of digital dependency and how intentional technology use can enhance our connections and well-being. Harrison, alongside hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye, explores the challenges of social media addiction, digital minimalism, and creating a life of presence. Through personal stories, actionable advice, and reflections, this episode offers a fresh perspective on digital intentionalism. Topics Discussed ● Technology and Relationships: How screens impact our connections and Harrison’s insights on restoring genuine relationships. ● Post-COVID Social Dynamics: Challenges young adults face in rebuilding face-to-face connections after extended isolation. ● Intentional Digital Practices: Harrison’s personal journey with a “dumb phone” and how it has transformed his relationships and personal growth. ● Mindfulness and Digital Minimalism: Tips on creating spaces free from digital distractions to foster personal and communal healing. ● Building Trust and Presence in Relationships: How setting boundaries with technology fosters stronger, more trusting relationships. ● Weekly Digital Detox: Harrison’s practice of a regular digital detox and its benefits on his mental clarity and relationship quality. Resources Mentioned ● The Light Phone 2A minimalist phone designed to be used as little as possible, supporting digital intentionalism. ● The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer Link Discusses the importance of slowing down in a hurried world, referenced by Harrison in his conversation on modern social spaces. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Content Warning 00:17 The Impact of Technology on Relationships 01:01 Welcoming Harrison Haynes 01:19 Harrison's Mission and Technology 02:06 Post-COVID Digital Dependency 03:07 The Desire for Real Connections 03:40 Social Anxiety and Digital Distractions 06:18 Creating Intentional Spaces 10:30 The Digital Detox Journey 11:39 The Light Phone Experience 17:13 Mindfulness and Digital Minimalism 24:15 Weekly Digital Detox Practice 25:55 The Impact of Constant Availability in Relationships 27:17 Navigating Long-Distance Relationships with Limited Technology 27:48 The Healing Power of Limited Phone Use 29:20 The Dangers of Codependency and Urgency 32:18 Trust and Vulnerability in Modern Relationships 41:33 Practical Tips for Digital Intentionalism 46:35 Final Thoughts and Reflections Connect with Us ● Website: ● Instagram: ● Twitter: ● Facebook:
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Navigating Intimacy: Lexi's Journey with Vaginismus, Hymenectomy, and Emotional Healing
12/15/2024
Navigating Intimacy: Lexi's Journey with Vaginismus, Hymenectomy, and Emotional Healing
In this heartfelt episode, Lexi shares her deeply personal journey of navigating physical and emotional challenges related to intimacy and sexual health. With the guidance of hosts Stephanie Boye, a seasoned sex educator, and Dr. Chez Leeby, a licensed marriage and family therapist, Lexi opens up about her experiences with hymenectomy, pelvic floor therapy, and finding the courage to advocate for her well-being. Together, they unpack the stigmas and societal pressures surrounding hookup culture, relationships, and self-discovery, offering listeners validation and insights into healing and empowerment. Topics Discussed - The emotional and physical challenges Lexi faced with tampons and intimacy. - Diagnosis and treatment: Understanding hymenectomy and its impact. - Pelvic floor therapy: Tools and techniques for overcoming pain. - The emotional toll of societal pressures and feeling “behind.” - Exploring hookup culture from a personal and reflective perspective. - The importance of finding supportive doctors and safe spaces. - Transgenerational trauma: How historical pain can manifest physically. - Vulnerability and communication: Building trust in relationships. Resources Mentioned - **Pelvic Floor Therapy**: Learn more about pelvic health and therapy options [here](https://pelvicpain.org). - **Psychology Today Therapist Directory**: Find a supportive therapist in your area: [Psychology Today](https://www.psychologytoday.com/). **"It’s Not a Trauma Olympics"** by Brené Brown: A guide to understanding and validating personal trauma. Timestamps 00:00 Trigger Warning 00:17 Coming Up In This Episode 00:51 Welcome to 7 on Sundays 01:29 Lexi's Early Struggles with Tampons 02:39 Discovering the Hymenectomy 04:08 Navigating Sexual Experiences 16:57 Pelvic Floor Therapy 20:43 Exploring Transgenerational Trauma 22:29 Exploring Historical Trauma and Female Bonding 24:23 Navigating Hookup Culture in College 25:01 Personal Reflections on Hookup Culture Connect with Us - **Website**: [7onSundays.com](https://7onsundays.com) - **Instagram**: [@7onSundays](https://instagram.com/7onSundays) - **Twitter**: [@7onSundaysPod](https://twitter.com/7onSundaysPod) - **Email**: [email protected] 26:02 Challenges in Current Relationships 28:51 Communicating Vulnerability in Relationships 32:03 Mindset and Physical Tools for Pain-Free Intimacy 40:37 Wrap Up 42:03 The Importance of Validation and Finding the Right Physician 44:05 Final Thoughts and Encouragement
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The Overwhelming Pressure of Hustle Culture on Young Men -Levi's Story
12/08/2024
The Overwhelming Pressure of Hustle Culture on Young Men -Levi's Story
In this episode of 7 on Sundays, Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye dive into a candid conversation with Levi, a 20-year-old college student, about the pervasive influence of hustle culture on young people. Levi shares his personal journey of navigating the pressures of achievement, societal expectations, and mental health, offering profound insights on finding balance, authenticity, and purpose. The discussion explores the spiritual and emotional dimensions of hustle culture, providing listeners with both inspiration and practical takeaways. Resources Mentioned ● Chi Alpha Campus Ministries: A national organization providing spiritual and community support for college students. ● The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer: A book exploring the dangers of hurry culture and offering insights on slowing down to live a meaningful life. Connect with Us ● Website: ● Instagram: ● Facebook: ● Email: [email protected]
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Intimacy, Porn, and Mental Health: Lessons from Parker’s Story
12/01/2024
Intimacy, Porn, and Mental Health: Lessons from Parker’s Story
In this powerful second part of our interview with Parker, we delve deep into the impacts of growing up in a sheltered, conservative environment and the formative influence of pornography on mental health, self-esteem, and relationships. Parker courageously shares her journey of self-awareness and healing, offering listeners valuable insights into overcoming shame, understanding sexuality, and rebuilding confidence. Resources Mentioned ● Digital Intentionalism 7 On Sundays Podcast with Harrison Haynes (episode Discusses strategies to reduce digital distractions and build healthier habits. ● Books on Body Awareness and Cycle TrackingExplore resources that helped Parker understand her menstrual cycle and its impact on her mental health. ● 988 Suicide and Crisis LifelineA free, confidential resource for anyone in crisis. Connect with Us ● Website: Find past episodes, resources, and show updates. ● Social Media:Instagram: Facebook: Twitter:
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Growing Up Conservative: Overcoming Porn Addiction and Shame - Parker's Story
11/24/2024
Growing Up Conservative: Overcoming Porn Addiction and Shame - Parker's Story
In this powerful and candid episode, hosts Stephanie Boye and Dr. Chez Leeby sit down with Parker, a thoughtful and reflective guest who shares her journey of navigating pornography addiction, self-worth, and sexual discovery while growing up in a conservative household. This episode delves into the impacts of early media exposure, shame, and societal expectations on young people’s sexual development and emotional health. Parker’s openness provides insight and hope for listeners who may feel alone in their struggles. RESOURCES: The Porn Myth: Wendy and Larry Maltz Timestamps 00:00 Trigger Warning 00:17 Coming Up In This Episode 01:15 Welcome to 7 On Sundays 02:02 Early Exposure to Media 03:16 Discovering Pornography 04:33 Struggles with Guilt and Shame 05:15 First Orgasm Experience 08:22 Confession to Mom 15:18 Impact on Self-Esteem 29:04 First Relationship and Parental Disapproval 31:55 Ongoing Struggles with Pornography 34:00 Masturbation Without Pornography 36:03 The Impact of Pornography on the Mind 36:26 Debunking Myths About Male and Female Arousal 37:53 Personal Experiences and Emotional Numbness 39:47 Struggles with Confidence and Performance 42:41 Therapy and the Path to Recovery 43:31 The Role of Communication in Relationships 53:07 Understanding Sexual Pleasure and Misconceptions 56:17 Navigating Relationships and Self-Worth 01:04:07 Concluding Thoughts and Future Conversations 01:05:48 Wrap Up Connect with Us ● Website: [Insert Website Link] ● Instagram: [Insert Instagram Handle] ● Twitter: [Insert Twitter Handle] ● Subscribe: [Insert Podcast Subscription Link]
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How Purity Culture Impacted My Relationships and Self-Worth -Haley's Story
11/17/2024
How Purity Culture Impacted My Relationships and Self-Worth -Haley's Story
In this heartfelt episode of 7 on Sundays, hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye are joined by Haley, who shares her journey of overcoming an abusive relationship rooted in a restrictive religious upbringing. Through an honest conversation, Haley reflects on her experience within purity culture, the emotional impact of family dynamics, and her path to reclaiming her voice, boundaries, and self-worth. This episode highlights resilience, self-discovery, and the importance of empowering young people to make informed choices about relationships and personal identity. Topics Discussed: The Impact of Purity Culture: Haley shares her experience of growing up in a fundamentalist environment that enforced rigid gender roles and limited education, leaving her unprepared for healthy relationships. Understanding Consent and Emotional Coercion: The conversation explores how emotional manipulation, often masked as love, can lead to a distorted sense of consent and boundaries. Healing Through Therapy: Haley discusses how therapy helped her address trauma, understand her own needs, and develop healthier ways of relating to others. Reclaiming Self-Worth: A journey from self-doubt to empowerment, Haley explains how she began to prioritize her well-being and recognize her value outside of relationships. The Role of Friends and Mentors: Supportive friends provided Haley with essential validation and perspective, helping her recognize the abuse and take steps toward healing. Resources Mentioned: 7 on Sundays Website An open forum for discussing relationships, mental health, and more. 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline Call 988 A free, confidential support line for mental health crises and suicidal thoughts.
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The Dark Side of OnlyFans: Exploring Manipulation, Control, and Empowerment (Sophie's Story)
11/10/2024
The Dark Side of OnlyFans: Exploring Manipulation, Control, and Empowerment (Sophie's Story)
In this powerful episode of 7 on Sundays, hosts Stephanie Boye and Dr. Chez Leeby dive into the story of Sophie, who opens up about her experience with OnlyFans and the complexities of navigating desire, manipulation, and self-worth. Sophie shares how a trusted relationship initially led her into content creation, which soon became a path marked by emotional challenges, self-reflection, and hard-won insights. Stephanie and Dr. Chez explore the themes of codependency, validation, and finding one's voice amid difficult dynamics. Topics Discussed Sophie's Journey with OnlyFans: How a friend’s influence led her into OnlyFans and the unexpected impact it had on her self-image. Understanding Manipulation and Control: Identifying subtle signs of coercion and the toll they take on one’s sense of autonomy. The Fine Line Between Empowerment and Exploitation: How society markets empowerment and how it can sometimes be used as a tool for manipulation. Building Self-Worth: Insights into developing internal validation and boundaries, especially in relationships. Advice for Young Listeners: Recognizing the importance of gut instincts, self-reflection, and prioritizing personal values. Resources Mentioned Codependent No More by Melody Beattie A foundational book on understanding codependency and building healthier relationships. Codependents Anonymous (CoDA) A free support group for those navigating codependent relationships. National Human Trafficking Hotline A resource for anyone needing information or support related to trafficking. Connect with Us Stay updated with 7 on Sundays: Website: Instagram: Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | | Google Podcasts TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 01:02 Stephanie and Dr. Chez Introduce the Episode 02:38 Sophie's Story Begins 03:06 The Manipulative Relationship with Adam 05:00 The Emotional Toll of OnlyFans 09:11 Reflecting on the Experience 11:53 Understanding the Dynamics of Manipulation 13:08 The Realization of Trafficking 23:18 Advice for Young Girls 35:39 Reflecting on a Defeating Experience 35:53 Understanding Trauma Bonds 36:53 People Pleasing and Validation 40:31 Empowerment vs. Exploitation 42:01 The Reality of OnlyFans 48:16 Trusting Your Gut Instincts 55:17 Concluding Thoughts and Advice
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Spiritual Connection After Loss: A Conversation with Laura and Beverly
11/04/2024
Spiritual Connection After Loss: A Conversation with Laura and Beverly
In this emotionally powerful episode, hosts Stephanie Boye and Dr. Chez Leeby engage in a heartfelt conversation with Laura and Beverly, two mothers who have navigated the profound loss of their children. Together, they share their stories, experiences with grief, and journeys toward healing. This episode touches on spirituality, connection with loved ones in spirit, and how Laura and Beverly found support and purpose through Helping Parents Heal, a supportive community for parents who have lost children. RESOURCES Community Recommendations Helping Parents Heal An organization dedicated to helping parents who have experienced the loss of a child find peace and connection. Website: [helpingparentsheal.org](http://helpingparentsheal.org) Book Recommendations "Dying to Be Me" by Anita Moorjani "Walking in the Garden of Souls" by George Anderson "When Bad Things Happen to Good People" by Harold Kushner Podcast Recommendation Next Level Soul – A podcast exploring spiritual topics, including near-death experiences and afterlife connections. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 00:17 Opening Thoughts on Life and Loss 00:55 Host and Guest Introductions 03:22 Laura's Story of Loss and Healing 08:57 Connecting with Loved Ones in Spirit 11:27 The Power of Meditation and Signs 16:14 Navigating Grief and Finding Purpose 22:16 Embracing Emotions and Support 42:01 The Power of Presence in Therapy 43:03 Soul Agreements and Spiritual Realizations 43:41 Stories of Spiritual Lessons 48:23 The Healing Journey and Community Support 55:08 Resources for Healing and Connection 01:02:46 Personal Reflections and Final Thoughts
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Part II Surviving Online Predators: Journey to Healing -Harrison Haynes
10/27/2024
Part II Surviving Online Predators: Journey to Healing -Harrison Haynes
This is the second part of Harrison Haynes' story, a journey that dives deep into healing and recovery from the trauma that began with online grooming. If you missed last week's episode, we encourage you to catch up before listening to today’s continuation. Prepare yourself for a deep dive into a story of survival, resilience, and the power of vulnerability. In this episode, Harrison bravely continues sharing his journey of healing after experiencing trauma from online grooming and self-harm. You’ll hear firsthand how moments of isolation can evolve into powerful opportunities for growth and resilience. Harrison’s story offers insights for anyone navigating recovery from trauma, struggling with loneliness, or seeking connection. His transformation offers hope and valuable lessons on community, vulnerability, and healing. Whether you are a young adult, a parent, or a survivor of trauma, this episode is filled with important takeaways. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 01:07 Harrison's Story: A Journey of Healing 03:47 A Life-Changing Dream 10:43 Finding Community and Support 14:26 The Power of Vulnerability 20:35 A New Path: From Atheism to Faith 28:54 Advocacy and Activism 31:53 The Importance of Open Conversations 42:15 Navigating Intimacy Beyond Pornography 43:58 The Healing Journey: Embracing Vulnerability 46:08 Unlearning Harmful Narratives 48:30 The Power of Community and Vulnerability 51:36 Recognizing Red Flags in Relationships 54:19 Parenting in the Digital Age 59:31 The Importance of Connection and Support 01:03:52 Final Reflections and Advice 01:19:01 Conclusion and Gratitude
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Part I Surviving Online Predators: Hidden Dangers of Online Gaming -Harrison Haynes
10/20/2024
Part I Surviving Online Predators: Hidden Dangers of Online Gaming -Harrison Haynes
Today, we’re diving into part one of an incredibly moving story with Harrison Haynes. If you’ve ever struggled with bullying, dubious online relationships, loneliness, or navigating the challenges of adolescence in the digital age, this episode is for you. Why You Should Listen In this episode, Harrison shares his deeply personal journey of being groomed online as a young teen and how it impacted his mental health and relationships. His story highlights the dangers of online predators, the emotional weight young people carry, and the importance of support systems. Whether you’re a parent, educator, or someone who has experienced online isolation, Harrison's wisdom and insights offer both caution and hope. Please be advised that we will be discussing sensitive topics, including suicide and online grooming. RESOURCES Suicide Hotline -Call or Text 988 Website The Cyber Helpline -Supports victims of cybercrime www.thecyberhelpline.com TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 00:17 Harrison's Early Online Friendship 01:01 Meet the Hosts and Guest Introduction 03:24 Harrison's Story: The Beginning 06:02 The Dark Turn in Friendship 07:47 Isolation and Emotional Burden 09:12 The Impact of Pornography 27:21 A Parent's Intervention 32:07 The Aftermath and Seeking Help 37:05 A Divine Intervention 39:33 Conclusion and Next Episode Teaser
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Sexual Choking: A Candid Conversation About Risks and Realities - Joy's Story
10/13/2024
Sexual Choking: A Candid Conversation About Risks and Realities - Joy's Story
In this episode of 7 on Sundays, hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye dive deep into a sensitive and often misunderstood topic: sexual choking. Joined by returning guest Joy, the conversation explores personal experiences, societal norms, and the implications of this practice in sexual relationships. This is a crucial listen for anyone seeking to navigate the complexities of sexual relationships, particularly regarding the often-overlooked and dangerous practice of sexual choking. Joy shares her experiences and sheds light on the nuances and potentially deadly unknowns surrounding this practice. Listeners will gain insights into: Recognizing the Risks The Importance of Communication and Boundaries Challenging Societal Norms & the Cultural Implications of Pornography Join us as we delve into these critical discussions with sensitivity and awareness, empowering listeners to advocate for their own safety and well-being in intimate situations. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 00:48 Hosts Introduction and Episode Overview 01:30 Guest Introduction and Topic Revisit 04:02 Understanding Sensual vs. Aggressive Choking 06:07 Boundaries and Communication During Intimate Moments 08:42 Normalization of Aggressive Sexual Behaviors 17:22 Conversations About Aggressive Sexual Practices 21:26 Advice for Young People and Parents 34:11 The Importance of Clear Communication 35:28 Developing Trust in Relationships 43:27 The Role of Safety in Intimacy 49:42 Final Thoughts and Reflections
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Setting Boundaries: Empowering Yourself After Abuse - Root's Story
10/06/2024
Setting Boundaries: Empowering Yourself After Abuse - Root's Story
In this powerful episode of 7 on Sundays, hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye engage in a candid conversation with Root, a survivor of sexual trauma. Root shares her deeply personal story, shedding light on the complexities of abusive relationships and the journey towards healing. This episode is essential for anyone looking to understand the dynamics of abusive relationships, particularly among young adults. Root’s bravery in sharing her story serves as a beacon of hope for others who may be experiencing similar situations. Listeners will gain valuable insights into: The significance of recognizing unhealthy patterns in relationships. The importance of seeking help and support from trusted individuals. How to reclaim one’s narrative after experiencing trauma. Episode Discusses Understanding Boundaries: The discussion emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries and recognizing one's worth in relationships. The Impact of Trauma: Root shares how trauma can manifest in various ways, affecting mental health and self-perception. Support Systems: The episode highlights the role of friends and family in recognizing red flags in relationships and providing support. Myths Around Sexual Relationships: The hosts encourage listeners to reflect on common myths surrounding consent and sexual behavior that are often perpetuated by societal norms. Join us as we explore these critical topics with sensitivity and compassion, aiming to empower listeners to advocate for themselves and others. RESOURCES If you or a loved one are in an abusive relationship, please call your local police or any of the following... *988 the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline Call your local police or (NCVC) 1-800-FYI-CALL if you suspect that you have been the victim of crimes 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) or 1-800-787-3224 1-866-331-9474 A service of Love is Respect, this national, 24-hour resource is specifically designed for teens and young adults. The Helpline is accessible by phone or online chat and offers real-time, one-on-one support from peer advocates trained to offer support, information, and advocacy to those involved in dating abuse relationships as well as concerned friends, parents, teachers, clergy, law enforcement, and service providers. A collaboration between Break the Cycle and the National Dating Abuse Helpline, this web resource provides information and resources on dating violence and healthy dating attitudes and relationships for youth. The site includes an overview of the issue (e.g., early warning signs, types of abuse, the cycle of abuse), quizzes for teens to determine whether they are experiencing or inflicting abuse, a live chat feature that connects youth with a peer advocate 24/7, videos, a blog, and more. In addition to the live chat, Love is Respect connects youth to the National Dating Abuse Helpline at 1-866-331-9474 or 1-866-331-8453. Youth can also reach out for help by texting “loveis” to 22522. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 00:15 Setting Boundaries in Relationships 00:40 Welcome to 7 on Sundays 01:25 Introducing Root's Story 02:20 Root's First Relationship 03:11 The Abuse Unfolds 06:14 Grounding and Support 07:39 Reflecting on the Trauma 08:34 Understanding the Abuse 17:35 The Impact of Pornography 30:17 Root's Second Relationship 36:35 Understanding Deserved Love 37:29 Setting Boundaries and Self-Worth 38:03 Family Dynamics and Dysfunction 40:35 Breaking the Silence 41:49 The Importance of Therapy 45:49 Recognizing Unhealthy Relationships 01:02:43 Power Dynamics in Relationships 01:08:02 The Journey to Healing 01:10:43 Final Thoughts and Encouragement
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Suicide and Silence: Men’s Unseen Battles on American Campuses
09/29/2024
Suicide and Silence: Men’s Unseen Battles on American Campuses
In this episode of 7 on Sundays, hosts Stephanie Boye and Dr. Chez Leeby delve into pressing mental health issues affecting young men, featuring a candid conversation with 24-year-old college graduate Thomas. The discussion sheds light on the high rates of suicide among young adults, influenced by societal pressures, toxic masculinity, and hustle culture. Thomas recounts his personal struggles and losses, underscoring the urgency of open dialogues, group therapy, and strong support networks. The episode also explores the significance of retreats and character-building activities, advocating for practical strategies like employing therapists for fraternities. Overall, it emphasizes the need for creating environments where young men can comfortably seek help and find their purpose in early adulthood. RESOURCES 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline Call or Text #988 Crisis Text Line text "TALK" to 741-741 SAMHSA Treatment Referral Hotline (substance abuse) 1-800-662-HELP (4357) Timestamps 00:00 Trigger Warning 00:47 Hosts Introduction and Episode Overview 01:54 Discussing Suicide and Mental Health Statistics 06:08 The Danger of Hustle Culture 09:16 Thomas’s Personal Experience with Suicide 15:47 Emotional Impact and Coping Mechanisms 26:41 Toxic Masculinity and Hustle Culture 39:32 Exploring New Interests 41:09 Parental Concerns and Support 41:29 Pursuing Passion Despite Practicality 42:15 Mental Health and Expectations 43:21 The Loneliness Epidemic Among Men 45:36 Superficiality and Genuine Connections 48:52 Recognizing Red Flags in Mental Health 53:22 The Importance of Deep Conversations 01:01:58 Proposed Solutions for Mental Health Support 01:14:39 Final Thoughts and Future Plans
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Navigating Depression and Loneliness in College: A Candid Conversation -Belle's Story
09/22/2024
Navigating Depression and Loneliness in College: A Candid Conversation -Belle's Story
In this episode of 7 on Sundays, hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye discuss the profound challenges of depression and loneliness with guest Belle. The conversation delves into Belle's personal experiences with suicidal ideation, coping mechanisms, and the impact of college life on mental health. The episode highlights the importance of recognizing depression, creating a supportive routine, and reducing the stigma around mental health. Belle shares valuable insights and practical strategies for managing depression, making meaningful connections, and helping those in crisis. Listeners are reminded that the show is for mature audiences and that mental health support is always available through the suicide and crisis lifeline at 988. RESOURCES 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline Call or Text #988 Crisis Text Line text "TALK" to 741-741 SAMHSA Treatment Referral Hotline (substance abuse) 1-800-662-HELP (4357) TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 01:16 Belle's Personal Experience with Depression 05:22 Coping Mechanisms and Their Impact 07:04 Depression is a Numbness to Joy 09:33 Why Depression Shows up in College 13:26 The Role of Loneliness and Social Media 16:56 Hookup Culture and Depression 20:47 Suicidal Ideation and Seeking Help 29:32 Therapeutic Tools and Strategies 38:18 Final Thoughts and Resources
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Why We Need To Talk About Smut - Anne's Story
09/15/2024
Why We Need To Talk About Smut - Anne's Story
This episode of the '7 on Sundays' podcast, hosted by Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye, dive into the controversial topic of smut, a form of erotic literature that is popular among teens and young adults. With guest Anne, a college student, the discussion covers her personal journey through fanfiction and smut, the psychological and societal impacts, and the normalization of content that often parallels the explicitness of pornography. Anne shares insights on how smut shapes sexual expectations and its effects on real-life relationships. The episode explores the hidden dangers, parental ignorance, and the broad normalization among young readers while addressing the need for open conversations and self-regulation. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Content Warning 01:28 Guest Introduction and Early Exposure to Smut 02:35 Discovering Fan Fiction and Smut 04:05 Exploring Different Types of Fan Fiction 04:50 Impact of Fan Fiction on Sexual Understanding 12:58 Revisiting Old Fan Fiction 20:13 Hiding Fan Fiction from Parents 25:30 Normalization and Popularity of Smut 27:12 Violent Themes in Smut 29:24 Psychological Impact and Sexual Templates 41:45 Power Dynamics in Smut Literature 42:37 The Escalation of Smut Writing 43:52 Vanilla and Consent in Modern Relationships 46:59 The Impact of Smut on Real-Life Relationships 48:54 The Importance of Human Connection 52:42 Addressing the Influence of Smut on Youth 57:29 Final Thoughts and Reflections
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What We Compromise For The Promise of Connection - Bonnie & Beth's Story
09/08/2024
What We Compromise For The Promise of Connection - Bonnie & Beth's Story
In this episode of 7 on Sundays, hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye engage in an insightful conversation with college sophomores Bonnie and Beth. They discuss the challenges and dangers young adults face in seeking connections, particularly through dating apps and hookups. The discussion delves into the emotional repercussions of seeking validation through shallow encounters and emphasizes the importance of building genuine, meaningful relationships. The hosts offer advice on self-worth, safety, and the significance of listening to trusted friends and family when making risky decisions. This episode is an honest exploration of the pressures and pitfalls of young adult relationships, aiming to inspire listeners to pursue meaningful connections and self-care. RESOURCES: TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 01:14 Episode Overview 02:22 Bonnie's Story: Seeking Connection 13:05 Beth's Story: Mixed Signals and Heartbreak 15:58 Self-Worth and Seeking Genuine Connection 21:17 Reflecting on Personal Needs and Desires 34:15 Realizing What You Want in a Relationship 36:05 The Importance of Self-Love and Self-Knowledge 37:43 The Power of Affirmations and Self-Respect 41:35 Empowered Statements and Personal Growth 47:35 Building Genuine Connections and Intimacy 54:15 Making Safe and Thoughtful Decisions 58:24 Closing Thoughts and Final Advice
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Breaking the Hookup Cycle, My Journey to Empowerment - Sam's Story
09/03/2024
Breaking the Hookup Cycle, My Journey to Empowerment - Sam's Story
In this episode of 7 on Sundays, hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye dive deep into candid discussions with Sam, a recent college graduate, who shares her journey of navigating through hookup culture and finding self-worth. The conversation explores Sam’s personal experiences, the impact of early family dynamics on her relationships, the realization of needing more than superficial validation, and how she learned to set firm boundaries. This episode is a profound look at how young adults can reconcile past traumas and choose healthier paths in their relationships. The discussion includes insights on overcoming codependency, understanding the influence of childhood experiences on adult relationships, and the journey towards embracing self-respect and healthy interactions. Sam highlights the significance of clear boundaries and the importance of communication in fostering meaningful connections. 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 01:17 Sam's College Experience and Hookup Culture 03:51 Seeking Validation Through Hookups 06:34 Codependency and Early Relationships 18:03 Impact of Childhood and Parental Influence 22:51 Healing and Self-Realization 29:50 Transformation and Moving Forward 35:45 The Importance of Communication in Relationships 37:41 Empowerment Through Boundaries 38:33 Parental Influence and Personal Development 41:30 Navigating Dating and Setting Expectations 55:14 The Role of Courage in Building Relationships 57:20 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
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Sorority & Fraternity Hazing - with Dr. Chez & Stephanie
08/25/2024
Sorority & Fraternity Hazing - with Dr. Chez & Stephanie
Dr. Chez and Stephanie take a critical look at the time honored tradition of fraternity and sororotiy hazing. As kids head back to school, or are going to college for the first time they will likely make the decision to rush Greek life or not. What are the good and bad aspects of the Greek system. Why are we allowing others to tell us our worth? How is it hurting young people? how could the system be improved? Let's dig in! TIMESTAMPS [00:01:30] Introduction to sorority and fraternity hazing discussion [00:03:55] The appeal of fraternities and sororities [00:07:05] Dr. Chez’s excitement for her daughter joining a sorority [00:07:57] Personal experience of Dr. Chez’s son being harmed during fraternity hazing [00:11:15] Introduction to the book "Among the Bros" and its coverage of fraternity crimes [00:17:07] Understanding hazing laws and university conduct codes [00:21:40] The Bystander Effect in Hazing Situations [00:26:42] Women and identity in sororities [00:29:45] The National Epidemic of Loneliness and Its Relation to Hazing [00:31:15] The Impact of Greek Life on Parental Pride [00:41:45] Making meaningful connections in college [00:44:05] Creating college community [00:49:03] Addressing both the physical and emotional abuse in hazing [00:50:56] Hazing experiences in sororities
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My Sorority Hazing Nightmare - Sadie's Story
08/18/2024
My Sorority Hazing Nightmare - Sadie's Story
In this 7 On Sundays Episode Dr. Chez and Stephanie explore sorority and fraternity hazing. Their guest, Sadie, shares the stories of her sorority hazing that ultimately caused the sorority to be booted from the campus and Sadie to drop out of the organization.
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Navigating College Life: Social Pressures, Self-Respect, and Authenticity - Hanna's Story
08/11/2024
Navigating College Life: Social Pressures, Self-Respect, and Authenticity - Hanna's Story
In this episode of 7 on Sundays, hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye converse with Hannah, a sophomore at a large public university on the West Coast, about the challenges female students face when not involved in sorority life. The discussion delves into issues such as loneliness, the pressures of Greek life, non-consensual encounters at frat parties, and the broader hookup culture. Hannah shares personal experiences and advice on maintaining self-respect and authenticity despite peer and societal pressures. The episode emphasizes the importance of staying true to oneself, the power of saying 'no,' and the impact of media and pop culture on young adults. It concludes with a reminder that opting out of certain social activities is normal and that the show is not a substitute for professional mental health support. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Content Warning 01:15 Welcome to 7 on Sundays: Episode Overview 02:48 Hannah’s Story: Frat Party Experiences 05:49 Greek Life and Recruitment Stories 10:12 Fraternity Party Dynamics and Safety Concerns 25:55 Navigating Social Life Outside Greek Parties 30:34 Dealing with Peer Pressure 37:15 The Dangers of Party Culture 39:39 Personal Experience: Being Drugged 41:28 The Impact of Negative Experiences 43:24 Meeting a Healthy Relationship 45:18 Objectification and Sexualization 49:44 Shame and Body Image 59:17 Building Trust in Relationships 01:09:57 Advice for Younger Generations 01:13:19 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
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Navigating College Life: Authenticity, Social Expectations, and Hookup Culture - Lauren's Story
08/04/2024
Navigating College Life: Authenticity, Social Expectations, and Hookup Culture - Lauren's Story
In this episode of the 7 on Sundays podcast, Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye delve into the complex challenges that young adults face during and after college life. They are joined by Lauren, who provides insightful reflections on Greek life, social expectations, and hookup culture. Lauren discusses the importance of self-exploration and emotional intimacy, highlighting the struggles that come with conforming to societal norms and the paradox of choice in college environments. The discussion emphasizes the significance of doing what you genuinely want and not caring about others' opinions to foster authenticity and genuine connections. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 01:53 Welcome to 7 on Sundays: Exploring College Life 04:06 Social and Academic Expectations 06:41 Hookup Culture in College 13:58 We’re Losing How to be in a Relationship 17:30 Transitioning to Post-College Dating 21:58 The Loneliness Epidemic 26:18 Navigating Greek Life and Hookups 28:36 Rewards and Gender Differences in Hookups 32:20 Fear of Gossip and Rating Systems 33:45 Flying Under the Radar in College 39:34 Advice for College Freshmen 41:48 Wrap-up: Exploring Interests Outside Greek Life 45:39 The Importance of Authentic Connections 50:37 Final Thoughts
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"Repeating The Same Red Flag Relationships Stops NOW" - Hope's Story
07/28/2024
"Repeating The Same Red Flag Relationships Stops NOW" - Hope's Story
In this episode of the 7 On Sundays podcast, hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye dive into a candid interview with Hope, who courageously shares her experiences with two significant and emotionally abusive early relationships. Discussing the intense emotional dependency and manipulation she faced, Hope provides detailed insights into recognizing red flags, trusting intuition, and learning from unhealthy relationships. The episode emphasizes the importance of self-awareness, setting boundaries, and seeking support and therapy. Both the hosts and Hope offer valuable advice for young adults navigating similar situations. RESOURCES If you or a loved one are in an abusive relationship, please call your local police or 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) or 1-800-787-3224 1-866-331-9474 *988 The National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Trigger Warning & Introduction 01:32 Hope's Story: Early Relationships and Emotional Manipulation 06:35 A Second Relationship: Casual to Toxic 11:20 Hope's Reflections and Lessons Learned 17isCatching Red Flags 19:50 Breaking Patterns From Your Upbringing 25:07 Relationships Shouldn’t be a Burden 30:04 Hope's Advice for Young Listeners 37:25 Therapist's Analysis and Final Thoughts
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"Breaking Down Porn Myths" - With Dr. Chez Leeby & Stephanie Boye
07/21/2024
"Breaking Down Porn Myths" - With Dr. Chez Leeby & Stephanie Boye
In this episode of the 7 On Sundays podcast, hosts Dr. Chez Leeby and Stephanie Boye tackle sensitive and often triggering topics surrounding the porn industry. Through Stephanie's candid conversation with former adult film star Cici, they explore the dehumanization and abuse experienced by women and men within the porn industry. They delve into the psychological and physical harm perpetuated by the industry, discussing the impact of conditioning, the lack of safety standards, and the devastating consequences for those involved. This episode highlights the need for awareness, critical thinking, and bringing humanity back into the conversation. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Welcome to 7 On Sundays 01:28 Impactful Interview with Cici 04:27 Lack of Safety and Protections 10:13 The Exploitation of Youth 16:31 The Recruiter's Trap 26:03 The Concept of 'Making Hate' 28:18 The Evolution of Pornography 30:39 The Impact of Violent Pornography 33:05 Psychological and Emotional Effects 37:22 The Industry's Dark Side 44:04 Porn Is Teaching A Twisted Version of Sex 48:02 Empowerment and Critical Thinking 51:40 Final Thoughts and Resources
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"The Ugly Underbelly Of Big Porn - My Experience" -CiCi's Story
07/14/2024
"The Ugly Underbelly Of Big Porn - My Experience" -CiCi's Story
Today we are re-airing an episode from Stephanie's podcast, Laid Bare With Anonymous X (still available on spotify and all podcast platforms). In this powerful episode re-airing on 7 On Sundays, host Stephanie Boye interviews Cici, a former porn star, who candidly shares her experiences and busts myths surrounding the adult film industry. Big porn is as corrupt and deceitful as all the other BIGs - tobacco, food, pharma. The discussion focuses on the harsh realities faced by performers, including the lack of consent, painful and degrading scenes, unrealistic depictions of sex, and the psychological and physical toll on those involved. This episode aims to educate listeners about the true nature of the porn industry, encouraging critical thinking and informed choices. Viewer discretion is advised. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Content Warning 01:17 Hosts Introduction and Episode Overview: Myths and Realities of the Porn Industry 06:09 Cici's Personal Experiences and Testimonies 10:54 Debunking Common Porn Myths 12:12 Myth 1: Porn Sex Positions Are Pleasurable 18:02 Myth 2: Sex Should Last An Hour 22:32 Myth 3: Aggressive Non-consensual Sex is Acceptable 28:24 Myth 4: Size Matters 31:31 Myth 5: Women Enjoy a Facial 34:50 Myth 6: Women Like Being Called Sluts 38:48 Myth 7: All Women Love Anal Sex 48:06 Myth 8: Say Yes to Anything and Everything 50: 35 Myth 9: Porn is a True Depiction of Sex 57:38 Myth 10: Choking Is Acceptable Sex Play 01:00:36 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
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"I Am Way Too Hot For This" - Caroline's Story
07/07/2024
"I Am Way Too Hot For This" - Caroline's Story
Do college students REALLY have an understanding of consent? The answer is “no." Many young people believe "yes" to hooking up means "yes" to any and all sexual acts. They mistakenly believe that "yes" to some sexual act yesterday, an hour ago or last week means "yes" forever to that act. None of these things are true. Whether due to failed sexuality education programs, rapey cultural messages, caregivers naivete and insecurity about how to properly educate children about consent, there are grave misunderstandings about the nuanced aspects of many sexual hook ups. As a result, much of what is happening during hookups (especiallly when drunk) are closer to assault than consensual sex. Hint: you can not get consent from a drunk person. While affirmative consent means your partner has willingly agreed to sexual acts that have been clearly communicated, it is just the legal low bar. In sexual hookups the goal should be enthusiastic consent. Not only is your partner agreeing to communicated sexual acts but they are desirous and excited to participate in them. This is enthusiastic consent “Yes please and I can not wait to do it!” In this episode of 7 On Sundays™ we talk to Caroline, who has experienced sexual assault either intentionally or due to lack of education on the part of her partner. She did not consent to what happened during a hookup. The next day, the vague but scary, sickening, unwanted, and intrusive memories surface. Caroline shares her raw experiences and emotions about this harsh reality. We are so grateful to Caroline, a heroic warrior willing to speak out to help others. She turns her experience from pain to triumph, even if only for her little sisters. Thank you Caroline. RESOURCES (Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network) 800.656.HOPE, y 988 (National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline) TIMESTAMP 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 00:54 Welcome to 7 on Sundays 01:26 Introducing Caroline's Story 03:08 Caroline's Experience of Assault 09:43 Understanding Consent 14:27 Impact on Relationships and Self-Worth 17:27 Learning to Identify Sexual Assault Setting Boundaries in your Relationship 25:30 Finding Self-Worth During Sex 33:21 Exploring Modern Sexual Norms 38:48 Healthy Intimacy and Communication 42:11 Reflecting on Self-Worth 44:36 Wrap-up: The Power of Consent Education
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"I Thought I Was Disgusting And Wanted to Die" - Brooke's Story
06/30/2024
"I Thought I Was Disgusting And Wanted to Die" - Brooke's Story
In this 7 On Sundays episode, Dr. Chez and Stephanie to to Brooke, a college student who bravely shares her struggles with genital dysmorphia, a form of body dysmorphia. Genital dysmorphia involves a constant concern about the genitalia. Body dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) is diagnosed when an individual has a preoccupation with an imagined defect in their appearance or an exaggerated concern with minor aspects of their physical appearance. This preoccupation causes significant disruption in social, occupational, sexual and other areas of functioning. Like our guest today, these individuals often report social isolation, anxiety, increased depression, and even suicidal thoughts (Bjornsson et al, 2010, Himanshu, 2020). Two thirds of individuals with BDD develop the disorder before age 18 (Bjornsson et al., 2010). There is an increase in young people seeking plastic surgery, as our guest Brooke did. A relatively new phenomenon called, “Snapchat Dysmorphia” describes a preoccupation with wanting to look like a filtered self image from social media and seeking surgical consult for this. Increased social media screen time contributes to dissatisfied body image, particularly for young girls. Research indicates that BDD affects 2.4% of the population, however, it is likely that this number is lower due to undiagnosed and unknown individuals who struggle but do not reach out for help. Our guest, Brooke, shares how damaging comments from peers, societal pressures, and cultural stigmas shaped her self-worth, genital dysmorphia, and OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). We also discuss “the orgasm gap,” the impact of societal norms on sexual satisfaction, and the importance of open dialogue about sexual health and body image. This episode emphasizes the need to stop shaming others' bodies and to embrace self-love and acceptance over the pursuit for “perfection” (which does not exist). RESOURCES Emily Nagoski “Come As You Are” TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 01:17 Brooke's Story: Struggles with Genital Dysmorphia 07:41 What Triggered All This? 11:48 Cultural Critique: The Pursuit of Perfection 21:45 The History of Shaming Vaginas 24:23 The Orgasm Gap and Female Pleasure 29:30 The Importance of Open Conversations 37:42 The Impact of OCD on Body Image 39:29 Healing Through Relationships and Self-Acceptance 42:23 The Power of Positive Affirmations 43:51 Challenging Genital Shaming 48:08 Therapy and Self-Reflection 54:42 Wrap up: Stop Talking About Others Bodies
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"Purity Culture Fed My Porn Sexpectations" - Drew's Story
06/23/2024
"Purity Culture Fed My Porn Sexpectations" - Drew's Story
Purity culture is defined as a movement beginning in the 1990’s that promotes a religious view of purity to mean abstaining from sex and sometimes even dating, before marriage. Purity culture emphasizes traditional gender roles in relationships and encourages women/girls to dress modestly so that boys/men are not aroused sexually in their presence. The doctrines and teachings are rigid and stereotypical in regards to roles and burden of “purity.” How does purity culture play out today for young people? Our guest this week, Drew, grew up in a conservative Christian household and a church that preached abstinence until marriage. He attended purity “conferences” that reinforced the rigid roles and rules. Drew openly shares how he experienced the words, images, and teachings that his church provided during his teenage years. For Drew, and others growing up with purity culture values, the information presented about sex was confusing, guilt-inducing, and shaming. He and other boys were watching porn and thinking that after marriage, this will be the type of sex they will engage in. The goal of porn viewing is usually masturbation and orgasm. When porn becomes the means for sexual release, the porn scripts and scenes can become the expectations you have for your partner. Drew had these expectations of his wife until he began to question and explore her needs further–thank God. It is important to note that pornography does not discriminate between religious and secular homes. It touches everyone. According to Covenant Eyes, 68% of church-going men and over 50% of pastors view porn on a regular basis. Of young Christian adults 18-24 years old, 76% actively search for porn. Drew and his friends were not an anomaly. In today’s SOS episode, Drew shares his personal journey to free himself from shame. He explores his feelings about the teachings he received at purity conferences, his experiences in a new marriage, and the ongoing process of unlearning harmful beliefs on both ends of the spectrum. The episode emphasizes the importance of open dialogue, education, and finding a healthy balance with sex and relationships. Porn has the potential to destroy intimate relationships in a myriad of ways. Luckily Drew and his wife are honing their communication skills and questioning the porn myths. They are working to understand the needs, desires, and interests (without guilt or shame) so that they both experience pleasure and true intimate connection. Drew provides us with an honest way to integrate our past and present understandings and consciously create healthy, reciprocal sexual relationships. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Content Warning 00:15 Personal Experiences with Purity Culture 01:46 Defining Purity Culture 02:57 Drew's Story: Growing Up in Purity Culture 03:59 Purity Conferences and the Apple Pie Analogy 06:27 Impact of Purity Culture on Relationships 10:36 Gender Roles and Double Standards 16:54 Navigating Marriage and Sexual Expectations 26:14 Challenges and Hypocrisy in Purity Culture 27:21 Marriage Pressures and Personal Reflections 28:56 Balancing Values and Realities 34:59 The Role of Masturbation in Clarity 36:41 Navigating Godly Relationships 37:24 Balancing Strengths in Relationships 40:37 Healthy Sexual Relationships 43:45 Deconstructing Faith and Shame 49:16 The Importance of Communication 54:10 Questioning Traditional Beliefs 01:02:28 Final Thoughts and Resources
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"Hey, Sara...I saw you on PornHub!" - Sara's Story
06/16/2024
"Hey, Sara...I saw you on PornHub!" - Sara's Story
Today’s story is about Sara, a survivor of non-consensual pornography (NCP), by her on-again-off-again hook-up we call, Dick! For legal reasons Dr. Chez and Stephanie share this particular story, not Sara herself. “Non-consensual pornography,” sometimes called “revenge porn,” is the sharing or distribution of electronic or printed photographs, pictures, or films that; show the genitals, anus, or female breast of the other person; or depicts that person engaged in a sexual act. The distribution, either purposefully or inadvertently, harasses, hurts, or shames the individual depicted in the photos. NCP is illegal in most states and punishments range from small fines to jail time, depending on the state. The newest iteration of this is known as “deep-fake porn,” where an image or recording is created using part real images, part AI generated images to misrepresent someone doing something that was not actually done. Sara is not alone. In fact, 1 in 12 people are the victims of non-consensual pornography, and 1 in 20 admit to perpetrating this crime. The most likely victims are young people between the ages of 15-29. Women represent 90% of victims and are far less likely to be the perpetrators of this crime than men. A study in 2019 suggests the problem has grown 400%! In our conversations with young women, we learned that many victims felt coerced or manipulated into taking sexual pictures or videos. Offenders use these images to sell or post (without consent) on sites and/or to blackmail their partners for a variety of reasons. For many victims of this technological assault, the traumatic aftermath is the same as sexual assault. The severe and disruptive mental health effects include PTSD, anxiety, and depression. The public humiliation and shame confound the psychological impacts. Sara has successfully moved past this horrifying time in her life. She feels some sense of justice and most importantly, she feels stronger and supported. She is thriving and considering working as an advocate to speak out against non-consensual pornography and help others understand the damage it incurs. For the time being however, she is happy to share her journey with anyone who asks. The tools and therapies that helped Sara will serve as a balm for the explosion of other victims of NCP. The resources listed below offer information on your rights and what to do if you are the victim of NCP. There are ways to remove the images and resources for healing. If you are a survivor of these crimes, we want you to know that you are not alone. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning 01:28 Sarah's Story: Understanding Revenge Porn 08:06 Sarah's Journey to Recovery 16:45 Legal and Emotional Ramifications 24:17 Therapies That Helped Sarah Heal 28:52 Raising Awareness About Trauma 36:14 Ethical Considerations and Consent 39:44 The Impact of Non-Consensual Content 42:51 Sarah's Resilience and Final Thoughts RESOURCES What To Do if You’re the Target of Revenge Porn (or NCP) 800.656.HOPE, y
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The Night My Boyfriend Strangled Me - Karoline's Story
06/09/2024
The Night My Boyfriend Strangled Me - Karoline's Story
Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) and Domestic Violence (DV) affects millions of women worldwide. According to recent research, almost one in two women (47.3% or 59 million) in the US report experiencing IPV at some time during their lifetime (Leemis et al., 2022). According to The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, approximately 1 in 3 teens is the victim of dating violence. IPV and DV may be considered the same thing, but they are not. Domestic violence is any abuse happening in the home. It can involve more than just intimate partners and can mean that a victim is fearful of violence in the house, possibly by more than one person. Intimate Partner Violence implies the victim is afraid of one individual, their partner. They do not have to be living in the same home. A Relias Media article explains, “Because the need for power and control is at the root of IPV, abusers generally need to manage every aspect and every minute of their victims’ lives, including increasing isolation from family and friends, using intimidation and emotional abuse, coercing and threatening, threatening to harm loved ones or pets, using the children, destroying important and sentimental objects, minimizing and denying the abuse, and shifting blame onto the victim.” According to the CDC, “‘intimate partner violence’ describes physical violence, sexual violence, stalking, or psychological harm by a current or former partner or spouse.” The abusers in these relationships use intimidation, emotional abuse, coercion, threats of harm, belittling, blame, minimizing, controlling, and denying behaviors (and words) to keep the victim silent, isolated, and oppressed. The root of these destructive relationships are power and control. How subtly does DV or IPV begin? How can young women recognize the red flags early? Our SOS guest today, Karoline, helps us understand how these dangerous relationships progress over time. Karoline was in a committed relationship with her boyfriend for a few years before he became physically violent. Why did she not share his dark side with even her closest friends? They weren’t married; why didn’t she break up with him? For the person experiencing the highs and lows of the IPV cycle, these situations are very complicated and confusing. Victims want to believe that their partner will change when they promise that they will. The hard reality is that change in these situations usually does not happen because of a promise to “do better.” If you, or anyone you know is experiencing any form of abuse, please call for help immediately. As Karoline shares, there is hope outside of the relationship. Empowered action for yourself is the first step to healing. You are not alone. RESOURCES If you or a loved one are in an abusive relationship, please call your local police or any of the following... *988 the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline Call your local police or (NCVC) 1-800-FYI-CALL if you suspect that you have been the victim of crimes 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) or 1-800-787-3224 1-866-331-9474 A service of Love is Respect, this national, 24-hour resource is specifically designed for teens and young adults. The Helpline is accessible by phone or online chat and offers real-time, one-on-one support from peer advocates trained to offer support, information, and advocacy to those involved in dating abuse relationships as well as concerned friends, parents, teachers, clergy, law enforcement, and service providers. A collaboration between Break the Cycle and the National Dating Abuse Helpline, this web resource provides information and resources on dating violence and healthy dating attitudes and relationships for youth. The site includes an overview of the issue (e.g., early warning signs, types of abuse, the cycle of abuse), quizzes for teens to determine whether they are experiencing or inflicting abuse, a live chat feature that connects youth with a peer advocate 24/7, videos, a blog, and more. In addition to the live chat, Love is Respect connects youth to the National Dating Abuse Helpline at 1-866-331-9474 or 1-866-331-8453. Youth can also reach out for help by texting “loveis” to 22522. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Content Warning 00:15 Cold Open & Introduction 01:28 A Shocking Story of Abuse Unveiled 03:36 Understanding the Dynamics of Abusive Relationships 06:18 Caroline's Harrowing Journey Through Abuse 14:52 The Cycle of Abuse and Its Red Flags 16:56 Insights on Toxic Relationships and Communication 23:23 The Importance of Recognizing and Acting on Red Flags 28:03 The Impact of Differing Social Habits and Values 29:53 The Role of Self-Worth and Fear in Staying 31:30 Confronting Abuse and Seeking Help 41:04 The Healing Journey: Therapy and Self-Discovery 50:27 The Importance of Autonomy and Recognizing Unhealthy Relationships 55:16 Closing Thoughts: Empowerment and Awareness
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