Episode 9 | Language of White Supremacy
Hey White Women
In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the intersections of cult dynamics, whiteness, and gender, discussing how personal experiences shape broader societal issues. They delve into the importance of language, the exit costs of leaving cults, and the power of storytelling. The discussion emphasizes the need for community support, the role of silence in conversations, and the challenges of navigating identity and intersectionality. They also reflect on the impact of personal narratives on societal change and the importance of inclusivity and representation in various spaces. Books: ...
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Episode 8 | White Supremacy in the Cult of Corporate America
Hey White Women
The conversation explores the themes of color, PowerPoint culture, repetitiveness of work, cult-like aspects of organizations, the need for individuality, the impact of white supremacy, and the power of democratized knowledge. In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella discuss the loaded language around the word 'racist' and the fragility and volatility that white people often exhibit when confronted with accusations of racism. They emphasize the importance of deconstructing belief systems and actively working to dismantle white supremacy. They also explore the concept of traumalages, the...
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Episode 7 | The Undergarments of Control
Hey White Women
The conversation explores the topic of underwear and its role in control and oppression. It delves into the societal expectations and policing of women's bodies, the arbitrary nature of professionalism, and the intersection of underwear with race and gender. The discussion also touches on the history of underwear, the influence of capitalism and consumerism, and the connection between underwear and abuse in cults. Overall, the conversation highlights the ways in which underwear is used as a tool for control and the need to challenge societal norms and expectations. The conversation...
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Episode 6 | Body Coverage
Hey White Women
In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella discuss the concept of body coverage as a form of appearance control in cults and white supremacy. They explore the loaded language and thought-stopping cliches used to enforce modesty and control women's bodies. They also touch on the intersection of race and body coverage, highlighting the policing of black women's bodies and the privileging of white beauty standards. The conversation delves into the influence of cult language and the importance of challenging and deconstructing these harmful ideologies. The conversation explores the limitations...
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Episode 5 | Kamala Harris and The Glass Cliff
Hey White Women
In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca discuss the representation of women and people of color in politics, particularly focusing on Kamala Harris. They explore the excitement and hope that Harris's candidacy brings, while also acknowledging the challenges and limitations that come with being a Black woman in a position of power. They emphasize the importance of not expecting one person to represent an entire demographic and the need to address anti-Blackness and white feminism. The conversation also touches on the concept of the glass cliff and the ongoing process of deconstructing white...
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Episode 4 | Body Size Control
Hey White Women
In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca discuss the concept of deconstruction and how it relates to body size and white supremacy. They share personal stories and insights about the control and manipulation of appearance in cults and society. They explore the impact of body size on self-worth and the harmful effects of societal beauty standards. The conversation highlights the need for self-reflection and the ongoing work required to challenge and dismantle these harmful ideologies. The conversation explores various aspects of control and coercion, particularly in relation to body size,...
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Episode 3 | Oops, I Married a White Supremacist
Hey White Women
In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca discuss the impact of white supremacy and cult-like behavior on their lives. Daniella shares her personal experience of being married to a white supremacist and how it made her reflect on her own identity and choices. They explore the pressure to conform to societal expectations and the importance of embracing individuality. They also discuss the power of self-expression and the need to challenge the norms imposed by white supremacy. The conversation explores the themes of freedom, perfectionism, chasing success, self-sacrifice, and the cult-like...
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Episode 2 | White Women and Black Hair: Bridging the Gap
Hey White Women
The conversation explores the significance of hair in relation to coercive control, dehumanization, and racism. The hosts discuss the experience of having their hair touched without consent and the emotional journey of embracing natural hair. They highlight the lack of consent and respect in interactions between white women and black women regarding hair. The conversation also touches on the impact of compliments and the importance of language when discussing these issues. Overall, the conversation sheds light on the deep-rooted biases and discrimination surrounding hair and the need for...
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The Myth of White Supremacy and the Process of Deprogramming
Hey White Women
In this conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca discuss their experiences with cults and the deconstruction of white supremacy. They explore the stages of leaving a cult and the process of deprogramming from the myth of white supremacy. They also touch on topics such as privilege, racism, and the impact of cult dynamics on society. The conversation highlights the need for self-reflection, questioning societal norms, and working towards equality. In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca discuss the importance of self-reflection and deconstructing the systems of white supremacy...
info_outlineIn this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca discuss the concept of deconstruction and how it relates to body size and white supremacy. They share personal stories and insights about the control and manipulation of appearance in cults and society. They explore the impact of body size on self-worth and the harmful effects of societal beauty standards. The conversation highlights the need for self-reflection and the ongoing work required to challenge and dismantle these harmful ideologies. The conversation explores various aspects of control and coercion, particularly in relation to body size, bathroom control, and workplace dynamics. It delves into the ways in which control is exerted in different contexts, such as cults, corporate America, and educational environments. The discussion also touches on the weaponization of compliments and the societal pressure to conform to certain body standards. The importance of reclaiming agency and challenging societal norms is emphasized throughout the conversation.
Links:
Connect with Rebecca at:
Connect with Daniella at:
Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young
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UnAMERICAN Videobook
Takeaways
Deconstruction involves tearing things apart to create new solutions and solve problems.
Body size is often used as a tool for control and manipulation in cults and society.
Societal beauty standards perpetuate harmful ideologies and negatively impact self-worth.
Challenging and dismantling white supremacy requires ongoing self-reflection and work.
Emotional labor and the control of appearance are interconnected aspects of oppressive systems. Control and coercion can manifest in various aspects of life, including body size, bathroom control, and workplace dynamics.
Societal norms and expectations around body size and appearance can be oppressive and contribute to fatphobia and body shaming.
Compliments can be used as a form of control and can perpetuate harmful beauty standards.
Reclaiming agency and challenging societal norms is essential for personal empowerment and dismantling oppressive systems.
Recognizing and questioning systems of control and coercion is crucial for creating a more equitable and inclusive society.
Sound Bites
"When you tear things apart, when you spend the time deconstructing things, you come up with ways to create new things and to solve problems."
"It's not like you have good intention and all of a sudden, boom, we are not racist anymore."
"The idea of fat became inherently a negative word... unless you believe we're all supposed to look and be the same."
"Bathroom control is another thing that we always see in coercive control."
"This woman's a cult leader."
"Kids are the new slaves that we just treat."
Chapters
00:00 Deconstructing and Creating
05:40 The Control of Appearance
13:38 Bathroom Control and Emotional Labor
20:04 The Dehumanization of Children
43:38 The Value of Physical Presence in the Workplace
46:05 The Pressure to Conform to Body Size Ideals
52:28 The Role of Compliments and Jokes in Body Control
54:32 Valuing People Beyond Their Physical Appearance